


🌹 Desert Rose 🌹

by EmeraldTrident



Category: Charlie Countryman (2013), Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bisexual Nigel, But not until the end, Daddy Kink, Exhibitionism, Feminization, Forcibly medicated with needles (not in detail but in passing), Gaslighting, Gay Hannibal Lecter, Gay Will Graham, Genderfluid Character, Infidelity, M/M, Main Character Death, Manipulative Relationship, Mental Abuse, Mentions of Heterosexual sex, Open Relationships, Oral Sex, Panties, Physical Abuse, Prostitution, Rimming, Self-Harm, Threesome - M/M/M, Unprotected Sex, Voyeurism, Whump, Will Graham is Genderfluid but uses ‘he’ pronouns, Will is 20, age gap, mentions of cannibalism, mentions of dead bodies, photos taken during sex, smoking cigarettes, vomiting? Not sexy vomit. But someone pukes so I wanna be safe and tag it lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2020-04-07
Packaged: 2020-10-06 22:29:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 83,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20514542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldTrident/pseuds/EmeraldTrident
Summary: Young Genderfluid Will Graham works at a brothel in Louisiana run by his much older and controlling boyfriend, Hannibal Lecter. When Nigel randomly visits the brothel one day and lays his eyes on the beautiful boy, it’s all over for him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve never written anything like this in my life. At the risk of sounding unprofessional, shit gets real. It will have a lot of angst and drama, so if that’s not your bag and you’re just looking for fluff, this isn’t the fic for you...
> 
> ENJOY!
> 
> Also, there’s nothing wrong with being in the sex industry. Sex work is good valid work and it can be done safely and there are plenty of good people involved in sex work. This fic is simply telling one man’s story. 
> 
> Also : I’ve been wanting to write a genderfluid Will story for a long time because I myself am genderfluid. Please don’t leave hateful comments on that aspect. 💐

Art by @magpiewendigo on Twitter

Nigel’s friend and business partner, Darko, had told him about the place years ago. An underground brothel in Louisiana with the, to quote Darko; “hottest, sluttiest, and upmost-depraved gay boys”.

“They love cock, Nigel,” Darko had said in his drunken stupor, surrounded by a skunk-smelling cloud of smoke, speaking loudly enough so his voice could be heard over the seedy club’s music. The back room was private but the noise easily permeated the thick maroon-colored curtains. “I’ve never gotten better head. Fucking never. Like hoovers, those boys. God,” his head flew back against the sofa as he remembered his experience. Nigel chuckled, taking a deep drag of his plain nicotine cigarette, mentally taking the place down as a possible tourist destination for the future, if he was ever lucky enough to drive through that part of the country.

Years later, the story still hadn’t left Nigel’s mind. Darko was a difficult man to please, and if even _he_ was able to sing the place’s high praises, Nigel knew it was something special. Which was why, when a long-term job sent him to New Orleans, Nigel decided to seek the place out.

It was well hidden, off a small dirt road of highway an hour outside of the big city, about a mile down near the water, surrounded by a thick brush of trees. It was ironic, the name _Desert Rose_, the place was built over a swamp. But the large glowing red words over the top of the building stood proudly, despite the environment around them.

Nigel parked in the small, almost empty lot. There were only two other cars and they were stationed between the _Staff_ lines. Nigel cursed under his breath, this place was off the map, just like Darko had said. Of course, it had to be, prostitution was still very illegal in the state, and while Nigel wasn’t a stranger when it came to an illegal activity he couldn’t help but feel like he was being set up. All he wanted was a good hot fuck, if the police suddenly came swarming out from the brush, it would totally kill his hard-on.

He walked up the steps to the front door of the brothel after stamping out his cigarette and rang the instructed doorbell. A sign on the front stated ; _Ring once, we’ll be right with you_, with a small decal of a rose in the center underneath. Nobody was coming to the door for almost a full minute and Nigel considered turning around and leaving when the door flung open and a squirrelly looking man answered, dressed formally in a blue and black checkered suit. Even the man’s smile was obnoxious and his voice was overly peppy.

“Hello and welcome to Desert Rose,” he held out his hand for Nigel to shake.

Nigel stared at the man’s hand for a moment and back into his eyes, not making a single move to accept the gesture.

The man smiled awkwardly, swallowing his embarrassment before dropping his appendage.

“You’ll see Mondays are a bit of a slow day. Hardly any appointments. You’re in luck! You get your pick of the boys,” he gestured Nigel to enter, stepping off to the side and sweeping his arm out beckoning him in.

The entrance room was a bit tacky, looking like a room belonging to a museum with its wall paintings and sculptures. Nigel was no interior designer but even he knew he could do better. But he figured the type of men to frequent the establishment didn’t care much about the over the top décor, they probably didn’t notice it at all, surely focused solely on what hole they were about to fuck.

“They like to congregate around the bar, just through those doors. I’m Frederick, I’m the manager. If you need anything or when you make your selection come find me and I’ll show where you can make your up-front payment.” He gave Nigel a curt nod before excusing himself back to his office. 

Upon opening the door to the main part of the brothel, Nigel’s eyes went wide. He’d found the party. Nine men, young and pretty, aging anywhere from nineteen to twenty-five were sat at or were standing around the bar, scantily clad, most of them shirtless, as they conversed with each other. A few of them were laughing at a joke one of them had just told when they noticed Nigel.

“Fresh meat, boys,” one of them said. A few wolf whistles rang out as Nigel stepped forward to take a seat at the bar. Some of the men swarmed him while the others decided to wait on the next customer, continuing to talk amongst themselves.

“You’re cute,” one man said, rubbing Nigel’s shoulder as he gave his order to the bartender. The tender was back in a flash with a fifth of whiskey. Nigel took a swig before replying with a halfhearted, “Thanks.”

The ones in Nigel’s vicinity were aesthetically pleasing but average as shit, seemingly incapable of nothing but dishing out compliments and bragging about their sexual techniques.

“You know I can make a man come in a minute flat.”

“I can pull my legs over my head, bet you’d like to fuck me like that.”

“My ass is so tight, bet you’d love to slide in, huh?”

Nigel was painfully bored, none of the men caught his interest. He wouldn’t take any of the men speaking to him home for a free fuck, much less pay for it. They were all disgustingly bland, too cookie-cutter, identically desperate, trying way too hard to get Nigel’s attention. Pathetic. He knew they were prostitutes and for fuck’s sake he wasn’t looking for a life partner but he wanted at least a smidgen of substance. Nigel finished his drink, tossed a bill down, and got up to leave, ignoring the underwater echo of the men’s voices still trying to talk to him. He would surely have better luck at a club down the street from his hotel room. He was almost to the door. 

That’s when he saw him.

In the corner booth, in an opened room attached to the bar sat a boy, keeping to himself. He had long brown wavy hair grown out just past his shoulders and he wore glasses. He was focusing on a drawing he was sketching. Immediately, Nigel was intrigued. He walked closer, silently observing him. The boy didn’t look up until Nigel was almost hovering over him.

“What are you drawing?” Nigel said, his voice soft, not wanting to spook the boy.

The boy looked up and Nigel saw his face in its entirety, having to hold back an audible gasp. He was beautiful. His eyes were turquoise in color, glistening in the light of the room. His pretty bow lips had a thin sheen of lip-gloss on them. He wore a pair of tight black dancer-shorts and a faded-blue thin t-shirt, the collar draping down below his clavicle on one side, his entire right shoulder out. He looked Nigel up and down quickly before turning back to his drawing.

“Just something I dreamt about last night,” the boy said, turning his sketch pad around so Nigel could see it. Nigel sat down and pulled the pad toward him so he could get a better look.

“Holy shit.”

The drawing was a black and white photo-realistic rendering of a mountain scene, the tops of the mountains were capped in snow, a lake below was frozen solid for winter. The boy had immense talent. “It’s really good. What, um, what was your dream about?”

The young man shrugged. “Just mountains. I’ve never seen them. They seem peaceful. Gentle giants, that whole…” he circled his pencil in the air flippantly, “…thing.”

The boy went back to his drawing and Nigel sat and stared, not at the pad of paper as he worked but at the beautiful boy’s face lost in concentration again. He had the urge to yank the boy toward him, kiss all that shiny gloss off his pretty lips, show him just how beautiful he thought he was. But he kept his distance, not wanting to come off as desperate. But damn, the boy already had him weak.

“Uh oh, looks like we lost another one to Willow,” one of the men still sitting at the bar said loudly nodding his head over toward Nigel and the boy, causing a small group to laugh.

Nigel didn’t register it at first until Will looked up to shoot a grimace toward the bar before continuing with his drawing.

“Willow?” Nigel said, confused.

“My name is Will,” the boy said looking into Nigel’s eyes. “_ They _like to call me Willow.”

“Not a bad nickname,” Nigel shrugged, attempting to help Will feel better. “It could be much worse. When I was in school my nickname was ‘_baiat prost_’ which in Romanian loosely means ‘_stupid boy_’. Mostly because I failed…almost everything. Even the teachers called me that,” He laughed and swiftly swallowed, feeling like a nervous teenager in front of his crush. Surely he was talking too much.

Will looked up at him and smiled politely before dropping his head again.

Nigel stayed silent for over a minute, watching the boy draw while brainstorming what to say next. 

“Can I buy you a drink?” Nigel said. 

“I don’t drink.”

“Admirable.”

“I’m not old enough.”

“How old are you?”

“How old are _you _?” Will said with a smirk.

“…Old enough.”

Will chuckled. “I’m just messing with you, man.”

“Why aren’t you over there?” Nigel gestured toward the bar with a tilt of his head. “Why are you over here all by yourself?”

“It’s my strategy,” Will said, dropping his pencil and lacing his fingers together. “Men come in, they see all those identical tight half-naked bodies and then they see me, over here by myself. I’m either drawing or reading, one of those quote-unquote intelligent projects. It’s psychology. The men flock to me because I’m different. I’m…cultured.” He smirked.

“You’re full of shit,” Nigel laughed, seeing through Will’s sensational lie.

Will laughed, nodding and taking his glasses off, laying them on top of his sketch pad. “I just…don't like the game of fighting for attention. If a guy sees me and he wants me, then I know he _really_ wants me. Not that I begged for his money or his body.”

“I don’t see how a single man could choose any of them over you,” Nigel said, his voice soft.

Will smiled, a blush starting at his cheeks. “Some men just have really bad taste, I guess.”

Nigel nodded. “I guess.”

Their eyes met for a few seconds before their gaze was broken by loud hoots and hollers surrounding the bar. A chorus of ‘_Hey Daddy_’ rang out around the bar as a man walked past them. He was wearing a red and grey three-piece suit and he looked expensive, his hair was perfectly quaffed, combed to the side, and he had a little spring in his step. He looked menacing until he broke a smile. “Hello, boys,” he grinned, touching some of their shoulders. “Slow day today. Staying ready for anything? On our toes, are we?” “You know it, Daddy.” “Always!” “Very good,” he praised before landing his sights on Nigel and Will and began walking toward them.

“How’s my favorite boy?” The man said sitting down on the other side of Will and tugging the boy’s chin over to him with the hook of his finger. Nigel looked away as the two men shared a lingering kiss full of tongue. The tiny whimpering sound Will made in their embrace was difficult to ignore, going straight to Nigel’s cock.

“Who is your friend, darling?”

“Nigel,” he introduced himself but looking at Will instead of the new man as he spoke his name. Will’s expression was soft. “My name is Nigel. Perhaps I made a mistake?” He moved to get up.

“No, stay,” the man said, his arm wrapped around Will’s shoulder. Sitting up Nigel saw Will was rubbing the man’s leg under the table. “Please do. He likes you, I can tell.” The man pressed his face against the side of Will’s who was staring straight up at Nigel, big doe eyes, pleading.

Nigel was transfixed by that look, sitting back down.

“Pleasure to meet you, Nigel,” the man held out his hand for a handshake that Nigel accepted, making sure to not skimp on the pressure. “I’m Hannibal, and this is my brothel.” He held his arms out, looking like an arrogant king in the process. “This here is my boy,” Hannibal said, kissing the side of Will’s face again. Will turned his face to kiss Hannibal, short and chaste.

Nigel would’ve given anything for Will to look at him the way he looked at Hannibal after that embrace. A fleeting look to his lips again, a bite of his own, his eyes hungry for more.

“One of many. But he’s my favorite,” Hannibal smiled a sharp-toothed grin before breaking eye contact with Will to look over at Nigel.

“You’re my favorite too, Daddy,” Will sighed, pressing his forehead against the side of Hannibal’s face.

“I really should go,” Nigel said.

“You wanna fuck him?” Hannibal asked Nigel. “You didn’t come all the way out here for nothing, did you?”

Will leaned to whisper something in Hannibal’s ear and he smiled wide. “He wants you to fuck him. Tell him yourself, darling.”

It was as if a completely different look had glossed over Will’s face, full of lust, his cheeks blushed with want. “Please stay, Nigel.”

Nigel felt like an arrow had been shot through his heart at those words, those gorgeous words from those pretty shiny lips. Was this all a ploy, bait and hook for some money? Regardless, Nigel didn’t care. He just wanted to be inside the beautiful boy.

Nigel nodded, a lowly sailor to Will’s irresistible siren song.

“Take him back to your room, darling,” Hannibal nuzzled the side of Will’s face. “I’ll run his card and meet you there.”

“Yes, Sir,” Will said getting up and offering his hand to Nigel, a shy smile on his face. He was too good at playing innocent and sweet. Nigel wanted to destroy him. He couldn’t wait to get his hands on that pert little body.

He blindly slid Hannibal his card and accepted Will’s hand in his and began walking to the other end of the bar where all of the boy's permanent bedrooms were located, stemming off a long hallway. Along the way Nigel couldn’t keep his eyes off Will’s body, letting him walk in front of him for a moment so he could watch his body sway in his stride. His ass in the little black shorts had Nigel wanting to drop to his knees in the hallway, rip those shorts down and start kissing and licking inside his body. He wondered what Will would sound like in ecstasy, his heart was thrumming hard in his chest knowing he wasn’t too far away from finding out.

“Sorry about that,” Will said, finally speaking again when he could guarantee Hannibal was out of earshot, turning to Nigel as he unlocked his bedroom with the bracelet he was wearing. It lit up green, as did the digital door handle as he pushed inside.

“For what?” Nigel said, taking in the large room. An entire wall of the room was a mirror, the bed was massive; a California King, with a large fluffy white comforter atop it.

“Hannibal can be a little…possessive,” he smirked. “We can expect him back any minute now.”

“Wait…he’s gonna fucking stay?”

“He likes to watch,” Will smirked taking a seat on his bed and crossing his legs, gesturing for Nigel to do the same, patting the space next to him with a flat palm.

“What if I deny him?” Nigel said.

“He’ll have you kicked out and keep the deposit. He’s almost always in the room when I’m with someone new. Like I said he’s very…”

“Why are you saying all this? I’m sure that guy, Hannibal, wouldn’t like you breaking character.”

“I can tell you’re not into it. A lot of men are. But…”

“So this is the real Will? Not that little sex robot out there?” He chuckled.

Will shook his head. “I am when I need to be. When I want to be. It makes me hot. Truly. Give it a chance, he’s bound not to stay the entire time. He’s a pretty busy man.”

“Even on slow Mondays?”

“Even then,” Will’s gaze dropped to Nigel’s lips. Nigel started moving forward to claim him but Will pushed him back.

“Strict no kissing rule. If you have a kink for castration you’d try that in front of Hannibal.”

“How would he know?”

Will pointed to the multiple cameras on the ceiling in the corners of the room. “They don’t miss much.”

“I take it they don’t pick up sound? Can’t imagine how this..._possessive Hannibal_...would react if he saw you ruining the illusion.”

Will shook his head. “No sound. We’re safe.”

“What’s in those?” Nigel gestured with a tilt-up of his chin toward the two big crates on the floor in front of the mirror wall.

“Toys,” Will smirked.

“Oh yeah?”

“For an extra charge, I’ll dress up with a pig-tail butt plug and squeal real loud for you,” Will winked, holding back a laugh.

Nigel chuckled. He loved the boy’s sense of humor. “I’ll politely decline that offer, but thank you.”

They sat in silence on the edge of the bed for a moment before Nigel spoke up again.

“Are we waiting for him?”

Will nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault. It’s his rule. I’ll take you any way I can have you.”

Will’s lip twitched, hiding a smile.

“You’re exceptional you know that?”

“I’ve been told,” Will said, his voice soft.

“Not by me you haven’t.”

Will smiled, his lips pressed together.

“God, you could have anyone you want, you know that? So fucking pretty,” he lifted his hand to move a strand of hair behind Will’s ear at the same time the door to the bedroom opened and Nigel dropped his hand quickly. 

“Good boy,” Hannibal said with a cocky smirk. “You know to wait for me.” He walked toward them tossing Nigel’s card into his lap. “Charged you for the hour. Will here is going to do anything you desire,” he bent to run his fingers through Will’s hair. “Isn’t that right, darling?”

Will nodded, staring up at him. “Yes, Sir.”

Hannibal winked at Nigel.

“Go on then, on your knees for our new friend. Show Daddy how much you love cock.”

Will turned to Nigel, keeping eye contact with him as he got up to drop to his knees in front of him. Will nuzzled Nigel’s pant leg with his cheek, pouting his lips, silently asking for access. Nigel would give him anything. Everything he wanted. Just the simple touch of the boy’s face against his leg sent electricity through his veins. Will unbuckled Nigel’s slacks and unzipped him, staying staring up as he tugged them down.

Nigel’s cock was hard against his groin, leaking at the tip. Will found it with his tongue, lapping slow and tentative on the head and a bit under the foreskin as he raked his nails slowly down Nigel’s bare naked thighs. Nigel bucked his hips up. “Fuck,” he sighed.

Nigel tried ignoring Hannibal’s presence, zoning him, and his soft words of praise to Will every few moments, out. Staring into Will’s beautiful eyes was enough to do that for him. He didn’t hear a thing, every molecule of his body and mind focused on the pretty boy on his knees licking the end of his cock. He raked his fingers through Will’s long curls, holding and tugging at the root, directing him where he wanted him. “Take it in,” Nigel sighed.

Will obeyed, his pretty lips, somehow still glossy, opened wide to take Nigel’s cock between them. Will relaxed his throat and took him deeper, moving his head back and forth, soft and slow. His hands were still planted on Nigel’s thighs, tickling the skin with delicate nail work throughout. Making Nigel’s legs twitch. 

“God damn,” Nigel groaned. He pet Will’s face, his mouth full of his cock. He couldn’t believe the beautiful boy with the glasses, pad, and paper, from earlier was so good with his mouth. “Gunna fucking come if you keep doing that, pretty.”

A flash of light came from Nigel’s right and he whipped to look over at Hannibal who was taking photos of Will on his knees, full of him. “Loves having his photograph taken,” Hannibal smirked. “Loves looking at them later. Isn’t that right, darling?”

Will nodded minutely, his eyes watering a bit from the ache in his jaw. Nigel ignored it and turned back to Will, petting his face again. “Can’t last. Wanna fuck you.”

Will pulled off, leaving a thin line of spit between his bottom lip and Nigel’s cock. He left a hot open-mouth kiss on the tip before sitting up and crawling onto the bed, his arms folded against his chest pressed against the bed, his back arched. His ass up in offering.

“Do what you want,” Will sighed, turning his head back to Nigel, his long pretty hair splayed against the comforter along with his cheek. 

“That’s my little pride and joy,” Hannibal chuckled scooting forward. “Can’t resist him, can you?”

Nigel ignored him, ridding his pants and getting up onto the bed to join the boy. He wasted no time in snaking his fingers into the lip of Will’s shorts and tugging them down. Upon seeing what he had underneath, Nigel let out a deep groan. A white thong, pretty, demure, lacy. “Fuck,” Nigel sighed, it was the last thing he’d expected and he nearly came across Will’s back at the sight. He sewed his finger under the piece of fabric between his cheeks and tugged it to the side. Will was completely waxed, his pretty pink hole on full display. Will pressed back and whined. “Touch me.”

“I’m going to, pretty. Just entranced…” he ran the tip of his index finger down Will’s crack over his hole that twitched and contracted from the delicate petting.

“Nigel,” Will whimpered.

Nigel’s heart stopped for a second at the sound of his name. “What is it you want, gorgeous? Tell me.” He rubbed his finger against the hole, teasing him and watching his hips wiggle.

“Your tongue,” Will sighed. “Please.”

Nigel landed his palm against Will’s cheek causing the flesh to jiggle before diving in, his tongue lapping and sucking at the boy’s sensitive hole. Will gasped clutching at the comforter with both hands. “Oh my god.”

“Does that feel good, darling? Tell Daddy how it feels. How’s his tongue?” Hannibal said, laying five feet away on the bed stroking himself through his pants, not able to tear his gaze away from the scene before him. He’d watched countless men play with his boy and it never got old.

“So good, Daddy,” Will whined.

Nigel groaned, his tongue vibrating against Will’s sensitive flesh. “Tastes so fucking good,” Nigel sighed. “Such a sweet little hole.” He pressed the tip of his tongue inside Will and withdrew it slowly, going back and forth fucking him with his tongue.

“Nigel, please. Fuck me. Want your cock.”

“Give him what he wants,” Hannibal said, tossing a condom Nigel’s way.

Nigel avoided looking at Hannibal’s face, treating him like an invisible burden as he accepted the tossed condom. He ripped the package open with his teeth and rolled it down onto his cock. It was pre-lubricated. “Is this enough?” Nigel referenced the condom’s slight wetness, he didn’t want to hurt him. Will turned and nodded.

Nigel began rubbing the tip of his cock against Will’s hole, slapping softly against the warmth but not pushing in, teasing. Will tried to push back, trying to get the cock in his hole. “Please,” he whined. “Please,” he looked up at Nigel over his shoulder. “Nigel, please.”

Nigel slowly pressed in, Will’s pink hole slowly stretched around him. He gripped the comforter again as he whimpered. Nigel tugged the thong more to the side so he could see a clear view down at where his body connected with the beautiful boy. He slid in easily, his hole relaxing around him. “Fuck,” Nigel retreated his hips leaving just the head inside, before pressing back in.

“I love you watching me take cock, Daddy,” Will whimpered, holding his hand out to hold Hannibal’s. They laced their fingers together against the bed.

Nigel was too busy staring at Will’s body, drunk off the pretty view of the rose-pink hole stretched around him to notice them holding hands. By the time he did, Hannibal’s phone was ringing in his pocket.

“I’m afraid I’m needed elsewhere,” Hannibal said, checking the caller ID without answering it. “Be a good boy for our friend, darling.” Hannibal kissed Will’s lips, giving Nigel an ignored nod before leaving the room.

The second Nigel heard the door close Nigel gripped Will’s hips and pulled back. “Turn over,” he said. “On your back. Want to look into those pretty eyes.”

Will obeyed, flipping onto his back. Nigel rid himself of his shirt and Will of all of his clothing. Once Will was nude he wrapped his legs around Nigel’s body, running his fingers through his silver-peppered hair. “I already miss you inside me,” he sighed gripping the back of Nigel’s head, rubbing his other hand through Nigel’s hairy chest.

“I’m right here, gorgeous. Hold onto me.” He pressed in again, his face in Will’s neck, careful not to kiss, positive the cameras would pick it up, but breathing heavily.

* * *

Will’s legs tightened around Nigel’s waist as soon as he was full again. “God,” he sighed.

Nigel began softly fucking into the boy below him, petting his face with the back of his knuckle.

“You’re truly the prettiest boy I’ve ever seen,” he sighed.

“I can be a pretty girl too,” Will smirked, his breath catching as Nigel hit his prostate, his mouth falling open.

“You like this don’t you?” Nigel picked up the speed slightly. “Having your little pussy fucked? All these men. Being watched. You like being a little slut for it? All the time?”

“I love it.”

“Yeah?”

“So much.”

Will gasped. “Right there, fuck right there,” he angled his hips and gripped at Nigel’s back.

“You gonna come on my cock, sweetheart?”

Will nodded, his face hiding up in Nigel’s neck, his nose slowly running the length of his tattoo.

“Head back,” he nuzzled him. “Wanna look in those eyes when you come. Such a pretty boy. God, I wanna fucking kiss you.”

Will looked down at Nigel’s lips and Nigel imagined he wanted it too.

Nigel, leaned down, just about to break the rule, continuing his pace, when Will’s head was falling back and his eyes were slamming shut as he came untouched, painting his hairless stomach and chest with spurts of his release. He looked up half-lidded, green eyes watering and streaming down his cheeks.

“Nigel,” Will moaned, his nails digging into the skin of his back as Nigel picked up the pace, overstimulating him through his orgasm but chasing his own. He collapsed on top of Will when he came, lazily moving his hips back and forth as his body twitched and they held each other. Will pet Nigel’s hair, smoothing it back as the man’s body trembled over him. His own body suffering from its aftershocks, both of their bodies covered in sweat.

“Holy fuck,” Nigel sighed, nuzzling Will’s neck.

Will nodded in agreement, still trying to catch his breath.

* * *

Nigel stayed buried inside Will for as long as he could as their heartbeats slowed. When he was able to form a coherent sentence he sat up to look down into Will’s eyes. “I want to steal you.”

“Not the first time I’ve heard that one,” Will smirked, running his nails up and down Nigel’s bare sides.

“I’m serious,” Nigel said. He could’ve sworn he’d fallen in love. He finally finished his work of moving the strands of Will’s hair behind his ear. He couldn’t take his eyes off him, continuously marveling down at him. How was one human so physically beautiful?

“Hannibal and I are together.”

“I know,” Nigel said.

“He would kill you if he saw the way you’re looking at me right now. Right there,” he pointed at Nigel’s face. “That look,” he laughed.

“Can’t fucking help it, gorgeous,” he grit his teeth. “Kill me? I’d like to see him try.”

Will’s face turned serious.

“Do you love him?”

Will nodded.

Nigel sighed. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Will cupped Nigel’s face between his palms. “I can be your fantasy. When he’s not here and it’s just us. You can pretend he doesn’t exist.”

“But you’re in his bed every night. Aren’t you?”

“Don’t think about it.”

It would be difficult not to, but it was needed for his sanity. “You’re going to have me spending every dime I have here. You know that?”

Will nodded, a smile on his lips.

“Do you…do this with all the men?” Nigel asked, dreading the answer.

“Most of them aren’t keen on talking,” Will said. “Don’t even use their full hour. They fuck and they leave. So this is kinda nice,” he said. “I won’t lie.” Will ran his fingers through Nigel’s hair.

“Hannibal not keen on talking either?”

“Can’t we get off the subject of him? Please? Enjoy your last…” he turned to look at the digital clock. “Thirteen minutes with me. Don’t worry about him. Focus on me.” He pet Nigel’s cheek.

Nigel nodded. “So you have plenty of other pairs of panties like the ones you wore tonight?”

Will smiled. “Dozens.”

“Next time I come to see you I’d love to see you in them, matching outfit. The works.”

“You got it,” Will said. “I have just the outfit in mind. Skirt included.”

“Fuck,” Nigel sighed. “There a defibrillator in this place? We may need it.”

Will chuckled. “When we’re done just make an appointment with me with the manager upfront. He has a list of my open times.”

The realization of it all being a transaction came crashing down on Nigel. He would have to share Will’s time, his affections, with so many other people. The angel he’d fallen for, so fast, didn’t belong to him. Never fucking would. It felt like a punch in the gut.

“I’ll do that,” he said softly, his finger tracing over Will’s lips. Will didn’t make a move to push him off, his eyes stuck on Nigel’s. There was something Will wasn’t saying, Nigel could sense it. But he wasn’t going to drag it out of him. It would come out in time, if at all.

“You’d better,” Will said softly.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback to one year in the past, showing how Will and Hannibal met.

Art by @magpiewendigo on Twitter

**One Year Earlier**

“Happy Birthday! Wake up, you old bitch!”

Will groaned and hid his face in his pillow as his bed dipped. His roommate gleefully shouted the greeting into his face.

“Get off me, fucker,” Will said flinging his other pillow up knocking his friend across the face but not hard enough so he was thrown from the bed. His eyes squinted up at Matthew. “What time is it?”

“Time for you to accept the fact that you’re ancient,” Matthew laughed. “Get up! Hurry! It’s your last year of being a teenager, get up! Before you know it you’ll be dead!”

Will looked out the window between their beds, it was still dark out. He covered his face with his hands, rubbing his eyes and groaning again, turning over in his bed on his side away from his roommate. “I think I’ll be fine a few more hours, dude.”

“I want to take you to breakfast off campus,” Matthew whined. “You mentioned last week how much you missed pancakes and were sick of cafeteria Lucky Charms every morning. I got paid yesterday, Will. Come on!”

Will’s roommate was very eccentric, very kind and selfless, but also overwhelmingly annoying, particularly in the early hours. How did he have so much energy already?

Will sighed, sitting up.

“Atta boy.”

* * *

“Are you ready for the exhibit today?” Matthew asked, drenching his pancakes in syrup.

Will took a sip of his black coffee and nodded, his face still slightly droopy from exhaustion, his long hair, a few inches to his shoulders, hung in his face. “Yeah, I finished my final piece last night.” He moved his hair behind his ears.

“You think anyone will buy our stuff? I hope someone buys my watercolor, I worked on it for weeks.”

Will and Matthew attended an art school in Baton Rouge. All the students had submitted three of their best works of art for a downtown exhibit open to the public and it was being held on Will’s nineteenth birthday. His stomach was in knots, worried nobody would buy his work or even give it a second glance, think it was too weird, too out-there, too un-relatable. His main piece was a drawing of a person who was half-feminine and half-masculine, literally, with the pieces held together by hardened concrete mixed with blood. His professor had hated it. He had told Will it would have more luck in somewhere like Los Angeles; “_Land of Freaks_” he had called it. Will had allowed the dig to get under his skin and he considered pulling the work out of the show, but in the end, decided against it. If nobody bought his work, that was just fine. He just hoped nobody would badmouth him to his face on his birthday.

“I hope so, man.” Will began cutting into his pancakes and taking a bite. “Thank you so much for breakfast. I’ll pay you back as soon as I’m able.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Matthew smiled. “It’s my treat.”

* * *

“Don’t be nervous,” Matthew said with a smile, his arm wrapped around Will’s shoulder. “I’m sure people will love your stuff. If they don’t, then fuck them. You’re too good for this place anyway.”

“Thank you, man,” Will said, his smile meek, clapping Matthew back on the shoulder.

Will’s professor and curator of the exhibit walked forward toward the doors to the building. “The exhibit is now…open!” Their fellow students around them cheered, hooted, and hollered as people began spilling in to check out the art.

Each student had been directed to stand by their works and answer questions if anyone had any. Which Will frankly thought was bullshit. It felt overbearing. Art spoke for itself. But he wasn’t about to make his professor mad, he knew he was already on thin ice for his excessive tardies. Art school wasn’t anything like he had imagined. Art wasn’t something to be managed, it was free, it was its own being.

As time went on, some people walked by and checked out Will’s stuff, sometimes not acknowledging Will at all and sometimes giving Will an awkward polite smile before leaving. Nobody asked him a thing. But as Will observed his classmates getting nibs and orders and holding discussions he began to feel disheartened. He made eye contact with Matthew across the room, he had just finished selling his second painting. Matthew gave Will a sad smile. He gave him a thumbs down and slowly tilted it into a thumbs-up, a signal to stay optimistic. Will smiled and nodded. He was distracted when he heard a man’s voice to his right.

“I love your use of color.”

Will whipped his head to the side to see a man standing there looking at his work. He was wearing a three-piece tan-colored suit, and his hands were behind his back as he stood formally. He had an impeccable posture and a thick accent. Will couldn’t place it.

“T-thank you,” he said.

The man turned to look at Will and their eyes met. Will stopped cold and his heart skipped a beat. The man exuded power, status, wealth. Not to mention he was handsome, devastatingly so. The man smiled, toothy and wide. He moved closer to Will but still kept a respectable distance. “Excuse me for being forward, but the work you’ve created here, while gorgeous, pales in comparison to the work of God when he created your beauty. I’m Hannibal. It’s a pleasure.” He held his hand out.

Will placed his hand into Hannibal’s. His brain forgot to connect to his body for a moment and forgot the formality of a handshake until Hannibal’s hand moved first. “Thank you, Sir.”

“Talented, beautiful, and polite?” Hannibal smirked. “I’ve hit the jackpot.”

Will blushed.

“Tell me, darling,” Hannibal turned to the painting of the half feminine and half masculine person. “What was the inspiration for this piece? I can’t seem to look away.”

“Well,” Will cleared his throat, his voice wavering. He’d never felt so intimidated in his life. “I’m genderfluid,” he said, looking at the man to gauge his reaction to see how he would react. “Nobody knows,” his voice dropped. “I can’t believe I’m telling you right now,” he chuckled under his breath, moving his hair behind his ears nervously. Something about this man was causing him to spill one of his biggest secrets. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of his identity but rather cautious. The south wasn’t keen on such diversity. Almost everyone knew he was only interested in men, but his genderfluidity wasn’t a conversation he was ready to have.

“Is that the way you feel?” Hannibal said. “Half-masculine and half-feminine at all times, or does it waver day by day?” He kept his voice low to match Will’s, picking up on the fact that it was a secret.

“Sometimes it wavers, but mostly it’s down the middle every day. Everyone is different.” Why was he telling a stranger all of this? What about this man had him reaching into his soul to yank out all the hidden bits to proudly put them on display?

Hannibal nodded. “I’d like to buy it. I’d like to buy all of it,” he gestured to the other works which were charcoal portraits of his childhood dog and a Ferris wheel he remembered riding as a child.

“Really?” Will’s voice squeaked the end. He cleared his throat again. “Really?”

Hannibal nodded. “I’ll pay ten-thousand per piece.”

Will’s jaw dropped. He shook his head. “You’re not serious?” He chuckled.

Hannibal turned to him, his face stoic.

“Seriously?”

Hannibal nodded. “I like to support local artists. Do you believe your works are worth less?”

“Well, yeah…I’m only a student.”

“Never only a student. You’re an artist. A damn fine one too…” he looked at the art before scanning Will’s body. “Forgive me, did I already catch your name, darling?

“Will,” he said. “My name is Will.”

”William?”

”Just Will.”

“The pleasure is undoubtedly mine,” Hannibal said. “I’d love to take you for coffee after this. Perhaps some…” He scanned Will’s body. “Dessert?”

Will licked his lips right as he was being tugged into a sideways hug from someone to the side. “I sold my last painting!” Will turned and saw Matthew, a gleeful smile on his face.

“That’s awesome,” Will said with a big smile, holding Matthew’s arm. “So did I.”

“No shit,” Matthew said turning to Hannibal and back to Will. “Happy fucking birthday, I told you you’d sell it all!” He shook him in his hold. While they were distracted with each other in their glee Hannibal’s mouth pressed into a thin line.

“Birthday?” Hannibal said. “Today is your birthday, Will?”

Will smiled. “Yeah. M’nineteen.”

Hannibal nodded. “I’m pleased I was able to provide you with a birthday gift in addition to making your acquaintance. Acquiring such exquisite art in the process. I’ll leave you with your friend,” he nodded his goodbye.

Will stared after him. Matthew nudged him and gave him a knowing look.

“Wait,” Will said calling after Hannibal. “Thought we were going for coffee?”

Hannibal turned to look at both boys. “I figured you’d want to spend your birthday with people your own age. Not with some old man like myself.”

“Hey, you’re not that old,” Will smirked.

Hannibal looked Will up and down. “No?”

Will shook his head approaching the man, standing on his toes just slightly to whisper into his ear. “If I’m honest, you’re just my type.”

“Is that right?” Hannibal said, gripping Will’s waist through his t-shirt.

Will nodded. “What better way to spend a birthday than on your knees…in gratitude for helping out a starving artist?”

“Darling, you’ll be the death of me,” Hannibal said, running his fingers through Will’s hair. “Let’s go. Hmm?”

Will nodded. “I’m ready if you are.”

Hannibal wrapped his hand around Will’s waist taking him to the table to purchase the paintings to have them delivered. Before they left Will turned around to look at Matthew. He was smiling big, he mimed a phone to his head with his fingers and mouthed for Will to call him so he would know he was safe. Will nodded, positive he was in good hands.

* * *

“Magnificent,” Hannibal sighed, his hands stroking the tops of Will’s thighs as the boy rode him. “I walked into the right exhibit tonight, didn’t I, baby?”

Will nodded, his eyes half-lidded as he rolled his hips, the man’s cock deep inside him. “Yes, Sir.”

“I like that,” Hannibal said. “Love that, baby. But call me ‘Daddy’.”

“Daddy,” Will sighed, his long hair hanging in his face.

“That’s it,” Hannibal pet Will’s face, his thumb tracing the bits of left over come he’d left on the boy’s chin and lips. “Love seeing you messy with bits of me. Are you gonna come with my cock inside you, my Darling?

“Yes,” Will whined.

Hannibal smirked. “Be a good girl and come for me.”

Will slumped forward, the words hitting him deep inside like an arrow piercing each one of his vital organs. “Fuck,” he sighed, stroking himself, coming over Hannibal’s hairy chest and tummy. He soon followed, spilling into the condom, moving them both to the side so Hannibal could ravage him with kisses. Will accepted the man’s tongue into his mouth, breathing heavily around it as he floated down, clutching to the man’s arms as his mouth moved lazily trying to keep up.

* * *

“What is it you do?” Will said taking a sip of the Coke he’d ordered at the diner. “Must be a good job if you could afford to buy my paintings like that.”

“I’m petrified you’ll think less of me, darling,” he said with a light-hearted chuckle.

“Is it something illegal?” Will smirked, taking a bite of his sandwich. “Something dangerous? Are you an assassin? Drug trader and gambler? Sociopathic surgeon, who secretly enjoys the scent of the blood?” He raised his eyebrow.

Hannibal shook his head. “Illegal, yes. But no, none of that. Regretfully. That all sounds a lot more exciting than my actual line of work.”

“Which is?”

“I own and run a brothel,” Hannibal said, gauging Will’s reaction. “Full of beautiful young men like yourself. But their looks all pale in comparison to your ethereal beauty.”

“A brothel?” Will chuckled. “Like…an actual brothel? Are you fucking with me?”

Hannibal shook his head. “It’s near the water, a secret location.”

“What is this?” Will gestured between himself and Hannibal. “A recruitment?”

“I was hoping so, yes.”

Will shook his head. “I’m not interested, thank you.”

“May I ask why?”

“I’m not a whore.”

“Boys come and go, as they need the money. They never sleep with anyone they don’t want to. They went from being pizza boys, students, store clerks, to being well off and financially independent. Plus they have fun in the process. Am I incorrect in assuming your bank account isn’t in all that great of a situation lately?”

Will thought about it. His father had died the year before. He hadn’t left him anything and didn’t have any life insurance. He didn’t have ten dollars to his name before the exhibit, getting all his cash from art commissions and those were even hard to come by. His home was the art school’s dormitory and once he graduated he would have student loans, if he graduated at all. Art school was slowly stamping out his love of art itself. He’d applied for multiple jobs only to be turned down for lack of experience and all he wanted to do was draw. It was his escape, his therapy, his expression. He had no idea where he was going to go during summer. He’d hoped he could stay with Matthew and get an apartment for a couple of months but he was terrified to ask. Not sure if he’d have the money and not wanting to burden him.

“Men would line up around the block for you,” Hannibal said, licking his lips slowly. “You’d be the main attraction.”

Will imagined the lifestyle, what he thought it would be like to have money rolling in as he was paid to give head and fuck strange men. The thought was titillating, he would be lying if he said otherwise. But he was more than that, more than some common prostitute.

Hannibal could see the cogs turning in Will’s head, considering it all.

“I see you’re not comfortable,” Hannibal said. “I apologize. This evening was wonderful. If you wish to never see me again, I would understand.”

“N-no,” Will said. “I don’t want that.”

“What is it you want, darling?”

“I want you,” Will said softly.

“Have me then,” Hannibal said, reaching across the table to hold the top of Will’s hand. “You can have me, baby. Come stay with me, be mine. You can express yourself however you want to there. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Do me the honor of being on my arm. I’ll pay you for that honor if it would help you out.”

Will wanted to, already so enraptured by this man. His poise, his stoic sexiness, the way he had him wanting to drop to his knees with every word. He already felt like he was a part of him. Hannibal made him feel so irresistible, so sexy, so wanted. He could express himself however he desired with him. He could explore his fluid side without fear of judgment.

“I have school, I can’t just…”

“You aren’t happy there,” Hannibal interrupted, holding Will’s hand in both of his. “Are you?”

Will shook his head.

“They stifle you there. Don’t they?”

Will nodded.

“You can be free,” Hannibal said. “With me. At Desert Rose. Explore your deepest desires, with me by your side. You’ll have all the time in the world for your art. Relax. It could be a utopia for you. You won’t know until you try it.”

“I can’t leave Matthew,” Will said pulling his hand from Hannibal’s hold. “I’m sorry. He needs me.”

Matthew had become like a brother to Will. They weren’t just roommates, they were best friends. They helped one another with their studies, watched movies together in their dorm to cheer Matthew up after he got into fights with his abusive parents over the phone, they ate every meal together. He couldn’t just leave art school in the middle of the year, couldn’t abandon his closest friend.

Hannibal’s mouth was a thin line, he nodded. “I understand. You’re a good friend.”

Will nodded. “Thank you. For the offer, for…tonight. For buying the paintings. You really helped me out. My first year of school is paid off now.” He smiled sadly.

Hannibal slid a card with his name, number, and the name of the brothel on it over to Will. “In case you change your mind, hm?”

Will accepted it, reading the card as Hannibal was getting up to leave. He hadn’t taken a single bite of his food.

“Where are you going?”

“Your utopia,” Hannibal said with a smile. “See you soon.”

* * *

“What the fuck do you mean he owns a brothel?” Matthew laughed, shoving Cheetos into his mouth back in their dorm. “And he wanted you to come work…” he burst out laughing again, tumbling over on the bed.

Will chuckled. “It’s not that funny, man.”

“It’s hilarious!” Matthew said. “Wait till Lana hears about this. I’m gonna call her.”

“No! Don’t!” Will said. “It’s a secret place. He could get into trouble.”

“Oh, so you care about the brothel owner?” Matthew said with a lasting laugh. “Might take him up on his offer? Wait…you slept with him didn’t you?”

Will shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Wait so like, did it get you off? Knowing he was this big brothel owner? Gunna play brothel owner and prostitute with Lana next time. Hell of a role-play scenario.” He laughed. “You think she’ll like it?”

“He told me afterward, asshole,” Will chuckled, holding the card out of view of Matthew continuing to stare down at it.

“You’re not actually considering going are you?”

“I could make really good money,” Will said. “Could pay you back for everything. Could pay off school. Only do it part-time.”

“Will, you can’t be serious,” he sat up. “It’s dangerous. You could…contract something. You could get hurt.”

“It’s all safe,” Will said. “Plus, Hannibal said I wouldn’t even need to sleep with other men except him. Not until or if I ever even wanted to. I fucked him for free tonight. I could be getting paid for that,” he laughed softly. 

“Will, you cant do that,” Matthew got up to sit on Will’s bed next to him. “You don’t need to pay me back. You’re my brother. I’ll help you find a job, a good one. I joke, but you’re too important to me for me to just let you go down that route.”

“It’s not out of desperation,” Will said. “I find the idea of it intriguing.”

“That guy gives me a bad feeling, dude.”

“Hannibal?”

“Yeah…”

“Is it only because you found out what he does?” Will chuckled.

“No. I thought it since the moment I saw him.”

“And you let me go with him tonight? You prick,” Will nudged him with his shoulder. “No, but for real, man. He’s really gentle. Kind. He didn’t pressure me, he simply asked. I think he’s a good guy.”

“Who’s just infatuated with your looks?”

“Well, yeah.” Will wasn’t stupid. He knew the effect he had on men, and women, and nearly everyone who looked at him. He knew he was attractive, but he never let any of that phase him. 

“Hell...man, if I were into dudes you would’ve been my boyfriend a long time ago. I would’ve chased you for weeks.”

Will chuckled. “You’re not my type anyway.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” Matthew looked offended.

“Too tall, too lanky, kinda dorky looking,” Will lost it on the last word, bursting out laughing.

“Fuck you,” Matthew laughed, shoving Will over.

“Nah, if you were gay we’d probably be soul mates or some corny shit,” Will said.

“That’s right!” Matthew said. “Fuckin’ soul mates.”

They smiled at each other, a pause in their conversation had them both thinking.

“I just want you to be careful,” Matthew said. “I’m sure he’s okay, and I know you like him. Could see it in your eyes at the exhibit, can see it there now too. Just don’t let your guard down for a while. But you can do whatever you want.”

“Thank you,” Will said. “I probably wouldn’t start until Summer though, if at all. Can’t leave you all alone right now.” They looked at each other seriously.

Matthew had been going through a lot with his family and needed a distraction from it all. He pulled Will into a big hug, squeezing him. “Thank you, man. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

* * *

Life went on as normal for the following week. Will and Matthew attended their classes, ate their meals, spent nights watching films and working on class projects, and studying for their exams. When Matthew wasn’t with his girlfriend he was with Will. They were inseparable. As always.

It all changed on a Wednesday morning.

Will woke up to birds chirping outside their bedroom window. He grimaced and blinked his eyes open as he saw the sun streaming into the room in all its glory through the window. _ Oh fuck _. He had overslept. Matthew was typically his alarm clock on lecture days. He sat up quickly turning to look at Matthew’s bed. He wasn’t there. The bed was made. That wasn’t like Matthew to make his bed. It had been a mess since the day they moved into the dorm and it hadn’t been made since.

He got up and began to dress, hoping his Life Drawings professor would let him in the classroom after being an hour late. As he tugged his shorts up he saw a note on Matthew’s bedside table. It was undoubtedly written in Matthew’s handwriting.

_ Will, _

_ I’m sorry. I had to go. Don’t worry about me. I’m not coming back. Don’t bother calling. I wish you the best. This is goodbye. _

_ Your brother, _

_ Matthew _

Will felt a sinking in his stomach and he ran to Matthew’s drawers and ripped them open. All bare.

“No no no no,” he pleaded. _ He couldn’t have left. He couldn’t have left me. _He felt tears prick at his eyes. Matthew was his only friend in the world. The only person who kept him sane. He dialed Matthew’s number and it went straight to voicemail.

“Fuck!” He threw his phone onto his bed with force. He didn’t know where Matthew’s family lived, he didn’t have another way to contact him. This was a nightmare. _ A fucking nightmare. _ Matthew would never leave. Not without a proper goodbye. And not like this. Never like this.

He picked up his phone again to call Matthew’s girlfriend. No answer. He knew Lana was always at the gym at that time of the day. He finished getting dressed and ran across the campus to the gym.

“Lana? Have you seen Lana?” Will asked the woman at the front desk.

The woman shook her head. “She didn’t come in today. Is she okay?”

“I…can’t find her.”

“I’ll let her know you’re looking for her if she comes in later. She never misses a day.”

“I know,” Will said. “Thank you.”

He exhaled deeply and headed for his lecture. Maybe there would be someone with information. The professor let him in, but not without giving him a threat that she would allow one final tardy before she would be speaking to the dean.

Will ignored her and went to his seat, grabbing a big wooden clipboard and paper to begin sketching the nude woman in front of them. He didn’t notice he was crying until his drawing began to smear from his tears on the paper mixing with the charcoal.

“That’s not the appropriate gesture,” the professor said at a whisper behind him. “Start over.”

That was the straw to break Will’s back. Without thinking he picked up the clipboard and slammed it onto the ground cracking it in half and continued screaming as he picked it up and continued breaking it on the chair. Other students around him fled and the teacher was staring at him, her mouth agape.

Will tossed what was left of the board at the wall, nearing collapsing into a sobbing heap but remained upright.

“Mr. Graham, get out of my classroom and never come back.”

“Fuck you!” Will shouted. “Fuck all of you!” He shouted to the classroom. “Mindless drones, all of you. You just listen to what they say. This place sucks the creativity out of art. You should ashamed of yourselves,” he pointed at the teacher. “This school is a joke. A fucking disgrace. You won’t see me back here again. Don’t worry,” he snapped.

Will booked it back to his room, half hoping for Matthew to be there again. Hoping it had all been his imagination. But of course, he wasn’t there. Will began to pack, shoving everything he owned into his suitcase. Where was he going to go? What was he going to do? The only person he could think to call was…

“Hannibal…” Will ripped open his bedside drawer and rummaged around trying to find the business card. He found it and plopped down onto his bed and dialed the number.

“C’mon c’mon,” his leg bounced as the phone rang.

“Hello?”

Will’s heart fluttered hearing Hannibal’s voice.

“Hi,” his voice was soft and small.

“Who is this?”

“It-it’s Will.”

“Will? Artist Will?”

“Yeah,” he rubbed his eyes with the back of his sleeve.

“Are you alright, Will?” Hannibal’s voice was laced with concern. “You sound as if you’ve been crying.”

“My roommate left. Just out of nowhere, just...fucking left,” his voice squeaked with emotion. “Um...I’m pretty sure I’m expelled. I have nowhere to go.”

“I’ll be right there. I’ll be driving a black BMW. I’ll park near the dormitories. Give me an hour, okay, Darling?”

Will nodded. “Thank you.”

* * *

As he waited he overthought everything. Had Lana and Matthew run away together? Did they hate him? Why hadn’t Matthew told him where he was going? Had he done something wrong? It felt as if no time had passed at all when Will’s phone rang.

“Hello?”

“I’m out here. C’mon, my love.”

Will’s heart fluttered in his chest at the term.

Will shoved Matthew’s note into his bag and zipped it up, bidding the room a final farewell before he shut the door.

It was raining when Will ran out to Hannibal’s car. Hannibal got out to help Will put his bag into his trunk, holding a black umbrella over both of them. Will avoided eye contact at first, not wanting Hannibal to see the tears in his eyes. He turned to head for the passenger’s side of the car when Hannibal grabbed his wrist pulling him back toward him and into a kiss.

Will grimaced into the embrace, not in the mood for kissing but melted into it. He felt like he owed it to Hannibal. He’d driven so far out of his way to help him. He was sheltering him. Will carded his fingers through Hannibal’s silver peppered hair as their mouths and tongues moved together, Hannibal’s hand not holding the umbrella dug into his waist. Hannibal could taste Will’s tears. “Let’s go home, shall we?”

Will nodded, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

* * *

On the ride to the brothel, Will held Hannibal’s hand, staring out the window as the rain dissipated and the sun was starting to shine through the clouds. They rode in silence. Will didn’t know what he was doing, only that he had Hannibal by his side and he would be given shelter, money, and freedom, the first time in his life. Pure unadulterated freedom.

Eventually, Hannibal exited the highway headed down a long dirt road. “Are you nervous?”

Will turned and nodded.

“There’s nothing to be nervous about. You’ll see. You’ll be treated like royalty. I’ll make sure of that.”

Will’s smiled, close-mouthed and meek.

What was he doing? Had he lost his mind? He took a deep breath and relaxed. Hannibal’s hand in his filled him with warmth, he felt safe. Hannibal was still by all accounts a stranger. But, given his current misfortune, he didn’t have much to lose.

Just the day before Will and Matthew had been playing board games in their dorm, getting ready for a test on color theory of the renaissance period and now Matthew was gone and Will was running away from his old life with a stranger with the promise of freedom, of expression, from stress, away from judgmental eyes where he could flourish and be whomever he wanted to be. He stayed on his guard, however, recalling deep in his memory a few self-defensive moves he’d learned from YouTube videos in case things got hairy.

Will had never had a boyfriend before, never a true romantic relationship. He’d had a few hook-ups in his short life, a few dates, multiple-day flings, but he’d never been in love. The budding feeling in his chest for the man who promised to care for him scared Will, to death. Already he was so ready to do anything for him. Perhaps it was his delicate state causing him to cling to whoever was willing to listen, willing to help.

“We’re here,” Hannibal said with a soft coo. “This is your new home.”

He turned a corner and the brush of trees dissipated opening to a parking lot that was half-full and a large one-story building on stilts over the swamp. Desert Rose, the big glowing red sign read. It was daunting, charming, in a way. 

Hannibal parked the car and picked up his phone to call someone as Will continued to stare out the window at the building, watching men exiting their cars and walk toward the front entrance. They were dressed in suits, most of them. Some of them were decent looking, while others were mediocre in that department. Where they going in there to… Hannibal had told him he wouldn’t have to…not until or if he ever was ready. Would he be mad if he refused? Make him leave. He didn’t pay attention to Hannibal’s conversation as he was lost in thought. “Frederick, come get the boy’s bag out of my trunk, I’m going to show him around. Did you clear out the largest room as I instructed? Excellent.” He hung up.

He got out of the car and opened Will’s door, startling him out of his thoughts. He held his hand out for him without a word. Will tentatively accepted it.

“Hold onto me, you beautiful boy,” he whispered into Will’s ear as he walked them toward the entrance. Will wrapped his arms around Hannibal’s waist, resting his head on Hannibal’s chest as they walked. “That’s right. You stay close to me so everyone will know who you belong to. Isn’t that right? You belong to me?” He tilted Will’s chin up to look at him.

Will nodded. “Yes, Daddy.”

* * *

Hannibal let himself in the front door, waving to Frederick as he made his way past them to the car to gather Will’s things. Will’s eyes remained wide and curious as he took in the room. He recognized the paintings on the wall, could name all of them and their artists off the top of his head. Hannibal walked them through and into the bar area. “Don’t allow yourself to be startled.” He warned him as he opened the door. Will’s eyes grew wider as he saw half-naked men around his age all talking to and rubbing on the newly arrived men in suits. One of the boys was bent over the bar, his cheeks spread open by one of the clients inspecting what he was about to purchase.

“Daddy!” One of the men turned to address Hannibal which sparked a chain of greetings Hannibal’s way of the same title. “Daddy, where’d you go? My regular was looking for you!” “Who’s that?” “Yeah, who the fuck is that?” The men guffawed taking shots from the bar.

Will clutched Hannibal tighter, looking down away from the men’s eyes. Some of the clients turned to eye Will which made him uncomfortable. He wished he could turn invisible. Should he run? Could he run? This was all too much. After such an emotional day, sex was the last thing on Will’s mind. Hannibal clutched him back, rubbing his arm soothingly. He relaxed into Hannibal’s hold.

“Hi boys,” Hannibal smiled. “Off the menu, I’m afraid.”

“For now,” one of the half-naked men said with a chuckle.

“Leave him be,” Hannibal scolded, walking Will away toward the hallway of rooms. “Let him acclimate first.”

“Better not steal my fucking clients,” Will overheard one of the men say under his breath as they left the room.

“Right?” Another replied.

“Don’t pay them any mind, Darling,” Hannibal said. “They’re all my boys, but you’re my favorite. Hmm?”

Will nodded, allowing Hannibal to kiss his lips short and chaste. They reached the end of the hallway and Hannibal produced a glowing green key-card, opening it up. “This is your room. For when you take your clients.”

Will’s head snapped to Hannibal. “I thought you said I wouldn’t have to….”

“You don’t,” Hannibal pet Will’s face. “You don’t, my dear. I meant if you decide to start taking clients. Until then you’ll sleep in my bed with me. How does that sound?”

Will nodded, understanding. “What if I never want to…”

“Then that’s just fine,” Hannibal said. “I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, my beauty.”

Will heart melted at those words. He already felt so indebted to Hannibal. The growing bud of adoration was blossoming into love before his very eyes.

“I’m going to take you shopping tomorrow. I’ll buy you anything you want. Any clothing you desire. Any art supplies. Anything to help you flourish and explore your hidden desires. How does that sound, Darling?”

Will’s lip twitched and he nodded. “Really good.”

Hannibal turned them around and began walking them toward his bedroom separate from the others at a fork in the hallway down about twenty feet. “Now I should say, everyone sleeps with everyone around here. It may get a little noisy at night.”

“By everyone you mean…”

“I fuck all my boys, they fuck each other, sometimes it’s all of us in one room. There are after-hours parties between all the permanents every Wednesday and Friday. We go through condoms like they’re candy. It’s all very safe. STD testing once a week. You’ve joined a good group here, Darling. You’ll grow to love it. I promise you. But nobody is allowed to sleep in my bed. Nobody except for you. I haven’t had a main in years. I’m honored you decided to come.” He opened his bedroom and brought Will inside, sitting them both down on the bed.

It was a gigantic room with a large bed, a black comforter atop it. The walls were a deep shade of blue. A pair of antlers hung over the bed, nailed to the wall. It was all very calming, very homey.

Will had suspected that was the case. “I’m your…main?” He held Hannibal’s hands looking down at them and back up into his eyes.

“How could you not be?” He pet Will’s face. “You’re other-worldly, Darling.”

“And if I do decide to start taking clients you…won’t be jealous?”

Hannibal shook his head. “No. I don’t get jealous. Not when it’s just sex. In fact, it makes me hard just thinking about watching you split open by strangers. You whining the way you did the first time I slid inside you,” he nuzzled Will’s neck with his face, kissing his skin. “Saw the way those men out there were looking at you. My boys were jealous of your beauty while the clients all wanted you. I could almost read their minds,” he whispered against Will’s clavicle over his t-shirt. “Their filthy thoughts. They all wanted you on your knees. Wanted to see how your lips would look stretched around them.”

Will shook his head. He could sense what Hannibal wanted. “It’s been a long day. This is a lot to take in at once. I just want to sleep. Would that be okay?” He just wanted to be with Hannibal, just Hannibal, for a long while.

Hannibal’s lips formed a tight line, his jaw clenching before he nodded. “Of course, my Darling. Take all the time you need.” He got up from the bed to leave the room. “Make yourself comfortable. This is your home now.”

“Where are you going?” Will asked, his voice soft. “I was hoping you and I could…” he couldn’t bring himself to say the word ‘cuddle’ at a whore house. He needed Hannibal’s presence. He was so delicate at the moment. “Never mind.”

“I promised one of the boys a departure fuck. He won't be back for a few months. I’ll be back after I’m finished with him.”

It would be something he would have to get used to, he supposed. It was just sex, he told himself. Hannibal hadn’t looked at any of the other young men the way he looked at him. He would need to desensitize himself. It would take time. This was a good stepping stone.

He nodded. “Go have fun, Daddy,” he said with a forced smile.

Hannibal walked back over to the bed to capture Will’s lips in his. “You’re perfect. This is for us and us only,” he kissed him again, slowly. Will clutched to the front of Hannibal’s shirt as he dominated the embrace, nearly pushing him back over onto the bed with his domineering force, his tongue outlining his lips as he pulled back. “Only I can kiss you, only you can kiss me. Hm? Is that a deal?”

Will nodded vigorously. He liked that. A lot.

“God I hope you like it here,” Hannibal sighed. “I’d kill someone if I lost a diamond like you.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nigel visits Will for his second visit at Desert Rose.

_ Hello Gorgeous, _

_ I hope this email finds you well. I can’t seem to get the color of your eyes out of my head. Every song on the radio reminds me of your smile. I made an appointment with you for next Tuesday and I’m keen to see what outfit you’ve chosen for me. Your beauty is unparalleled. I’ll be dreaming of you until our next meeting. _

_ Always, _

_ Nigel _

Nigel took a deep breath before pressing ‘Send’. The message was perfect, or as perfect as Nigel could manage. He’d spent hours getting it just right, deleting parts that felt overbearing, adding bits that were more tame, back and forth until he felt completely satisfied with it.

Will had supplied Nigel with his work e-mail address, the very same one he gave out to all his regulars who wished to keep in contact. The one hour they had shared was enough to turn Nigel into a full-blown addict, itching his arm in anticipation of his next dose of forbidden fruit. Will was that fruit, ripe and plump, sweet and succulent. Nigel’s mouth watered at the thought of tasting him again.

It had been three full days and Nigel couldn’t get the beautiful boy off his mind, through drop-offs and meetings, travels, even while enjoying beers with some colleagues in the French Quarter, the boy was always at the edge of his vision, beckoning him back to his bedroom. 

If there was one thing about himself Nigel hated, it was his lack of self-control when it came to love, falling far too hard and far too fast and far too fiercely. Nigel knew it wasn’t love per se that he was feeling for Will, he was intelligent and self-aware enough to know it was mere infatuation, but it was so overwhelming it was causing him to lose sleep at night, to lose himself in time just thinking of Will’s angelic face. He felt crazy but he couldn’t stop reminiscing about the way Will said his name, the sounds Will made as Nigel had fucked him into the mattress, the way Will made him laugh with his wit and a stellar sense of uncaring and often crude humor.

Nigel found himself in his hotel bed, touching himself with Will’s name on his lips every evening. He’d found a perfume at a local shop that gave off the near exact scent of a candle that had been burning in Will’s room during their first tryst. He would spray his pillow, spritzing the sheets with the scent before laying with himself, imagining he was there again with the boy in his arms, his hole tight around him, his soft gasps in his ear, clinging to him, a fantasy that he was the boy’s everything, even for just a moment.

But every time, after it was all over, Nigel would remind himself the boy wasn’t his and probably wasn’t even giving him a second thought. He was just one of hundreds, a client, a lowly…fucking...client. He thought about Hannibal and how lucky the man was to have Will on his arm, to have Will’s love and commitment.

However, one thing Nigel couldn’t understand was how Hannibal could calmly sit and watch as other men took his love’s body. Nigel couldn’t fathom how that would feel, for Will to be his, only to whore him out. Of course, Will did it willingly and loved it, but if Will were his, he would be his and his alone. A wave of anger towards Hannibal bubbled up inside Nigel every time he thought about him. How could he not cherish Will instead of using him as a hot commodity? And why was Will with the man? Why was he selling his body in the first place? Was it for the excitement? The sex? The money?

Nigel had money. If Will wanted out, Nigel could gladly free him. He would spoil him like week-old fruit, buying him whatever his little heart desired and tell him every day how treasured he was. _ I could be so good to him, _ Nigel frequently found himself thinking. Then he would snap out of it, remind himself it was all unrequited and try his best to get on with the day. But no matter how hard he tried, his thoughts always drifted back to beautiful unattainable Will.

Two days passed after Nigel sent the email, with no response. Nigel checked his phone multiple times a day in hopes the object of his affections had replied. Nothing. Not a single sentence or word. He began to feel foolish, embarrassed, clingy and pathetic. He considered calling up to Desert Rose and speaking with the manager, the squirrelly man, to cancel his appointment with Will and never go back. Things had gone too far already, with time the beautiful boy would fade from his mind. Perhaps it was for the best.

He was attending lunch with some cohorts after a drop off when his phone chimed. Thinking nothing of it he traded his double whiskey for his cell phone and his stomach dropped, excusing himself from the table in search of somewhere private where he could read the message, his heart pounding in his chest the entire time. He found an alcove and leaned up against the wall to open his email, an unabashedly giddy smile on his face.

_ Nigel, _

_ You flatter me, you handsome devil. Who exactly is the woman tattooed on your neck? Should I be jealous? I went shopping for a new outfit for our rendezvous, hope your old man heart can handle me in it ;) _

_ Your friendly neighborhood hoe, _

_ Will _

Nigel laughed aloud reading Will’s email, such a witty little shit he was. He remembered him? Remembered his tattoo even? Was he serious about being jealous of the woman in his tattoo or was it merely a ploy? Nigel didn’t care, either way, he was ecstatic to hear from him. He looked at his watch counting down the hours until he would see the boy again.

* * *

“Welcome back, Sir,” The squirrelly manager said with a smile. “Are you choosing freely again today or do you have an appointment?”

“Appointment,” Nigel said, his voice low and gruff but he couldn’t help the excited shifting of his weight back and forth on his toes. “With Will.”

Frederick consulted his iPad, pressing his readers further up his nose. “Nigel?”

He nodded as the manager highlighted his name and pulled up a payment form, handing the device to Nigel along with a stylus. “Sign there, please. You can swipe your card in the reader, here.” He directed, pointing at the mass protruding from the side of the tablet.

Nigel swallowed, his happy energy quickly stamped out of him having to go through so much to see Will, quickly reminded of the transactional nature of their “relationship”. He felt as if he were purchasing a new couch, not gearing up to spend time with another human being. The air about it felt wrong and unnatural, but if those were the hoops he needed to jump through to see the boy, he would do anything.

Two-thousand dollars for one hour.

Nigel sighed, signing his name and swiping his card. The first time Hannibal had done all of the payment for him, to save him the hassle, from seeing the numbers. If Nigel was honest with himself it was an intelligent way of doing it, keeping the client ignorant, getting them addicted to the process without worrying about numbers. It was a genius ploy.

“Excellent,” Frederick said with a smile accepting the device back. He leaned toward the wall to press a button triggering an intercom. “Will, your noon client is here, please head up to the front to greet him. Will your client is here, please head up to greet him,” he repeated. He turned to address Nigel again. “Will should be in the bar area soon, if he’s not there already. Your hour starts the second you walk through that door. Enjoy your visit to Desert Rose.”

Nigel nodded and walked through, his palms sweaty, terrified, but as excited as a child on Christmas day. There was loud music coming from around the bar, many of the boys were entertaining men, sitting on their laps, sharing drinks, one of them was on his knees sucking one of the fully suited men’s cocks. He looked all around for Will but there was no sight of him, not even in the booths of the separate room off to the side where they had first met. Where was he? He stood awkwardly, looking all around. A minute had passed and Will was still nowhere to be seen. Should he have him paged again?

“Hey, handsome,” Nigel heard a voice behind him, whipping around quickly to see Will standing there, an adorable coy smile on his face.

Nigel’s heart fluttered hard in his chest, knocking about his ribs, the overwhelming desire to envelop the boy in his arms was too strong.

“Hey, gorgeous,” he said, trying to play cool, but it was difficult when Will was looking at him like that. He looked up and down Will’s body and exhaled deep. _ Holy shit. _

He was wearing a red plaid mini-skirt leaving very little to the imagination, paired with a sheer skimpy white button-up, only the bottom couple of buttons being used as the material was tied into an open crop top, and white knee-highs with lace at the top. His pink lips glistened with shiny gloss, his long brown hair hung in wavy loose curls down to his shoulders, and his belly button was pierced, a tiny platinum charm of a rose with rubies for the petals hung from his navel.

“You tryin’ to fucking kill me?” Nigel said, standing stagnant except for his eyes.

“I warned you,” Will said, reaching out to wrap his arms around Nigel’s waist.

The close proximity of the boy sent shivers down Nigel’s spine. He nodded, his voice soft and breathy. “You did. But I wasn’t expecting…”

“Wait till you see what I have on underneath,” Will said with a cute wink, his blue-green eyes glistening up at him.

“Fuck me,” Nigel sighed, not able to take his eyes off Will’s face, his pretty shiny pink lips. What he would’ve given to kiss them. Will was wearing a light feminine perfume, reminding Nigel of cherry blossom, the scent drifting off of Will’s shimmering neck and clavicle. The area was peppered with body glitter. 

“That’s what I was hoping you’d do to me,” Will gave a small chuckle ending his sentence as he took Nigel’s hand in his. “Let’s not waste your hour, hm?” He walked Nigel back to his room, walking a bit ahead of him just like the time before. The bottoms of Will’s cheeks peeked out from under his plaid skirt, the way his body swayed had Nigel wanting to sink his teeth into the flesh there, run over it with his tongue immediately afterward to soothe him.

“God damn you look pretty in that outfit, Baby,” Nigel sighed.

Will smiled, opening up his room with his wrist band and pulling Nigel in, wrapping his arms around Nigel’s waist again so they were chest to chest. “I knew you’d love it.” Will’s hands traveled up until he found Nigel’s biceps, squeezing and biting down on his own lip at how strong the man felt. 

Nigel’s hands began roaming Will’s body, caressing his sides with his palms, up to his back and shoulders and back down. His fingers purposely catching on the skirt sliding it up and turning to look at the mirrored wall to see what his pretty boy had on. He couldn’t contain his groan as he saw a pretty red lace thong from the side, toying the pads of his fingers softly against it. He wrapped his hands around Will’s sides as he moved him back a foot to look at the undergarment from the front. The pattern matched the skirt, same color and style, red plaid tight around Will’s half-hard and straining package.

“Fuck,” he sighed. Without asking permission, but knowing Will’s entire body belonged to him for the next hour he dropped to his knees and began laving and sucking on Will through the panties.

Will gasped, soft and feminine, his hands carding through Nigel’s hair as Nigel’s tongue traced him and his mouth surrounded him leaving hot wet kisses, dampening the fabric.

“Nigel…oh my g…” Will’s head tilted back as his eyes shut, his legs wobbly from the pleasure coursing through him. “I need to sit down. Nigel…”

Nigel didn’t hear him at first, so lost in Will’s taste and pretty sounds. By the time Will began tipping over Nigel was aware, catching him and standing to clutch the boy’s body against him. Will trembled in the man’s hold. “Sorry…” he chuckled softly into Nigel’s neck. “Nobody ever…”

“I know, baby,” Nigel cooed. “They all use you for their own needs, don’t they?”

Will nodded, pausing before shaking his head. What was he saying? _ No. Don’t tell him that. _

“No, I just haven’t…I’m not used to it standing up.”

Nigel ran his fingers through Will’s long hair, massaging the boy’s scalp. “Sensitive little thing. Hm?”

Will nodded.

“So young and pretty. Let’s sit you down next time. Wouldn’t want you toppling over.” He nuzzled the side of Will’s head. “If you hit your head and knocked yourself out I don’t even think I’d get my two grand back.”

Will playfully smacked Nigel’s chest. “Shut up.”

Nigel chuckled.

“C’mon, let’s get you onto the bed.” He backed Will up until they were sitting down on the surface.

Will rubbed Nigel’s thigh over his pants, staying close to the man. His skirt had stayed bunched up, his panties still showing. “What is it you want to do to me today?”

The possibilities flickered through Nigel’s mind like a pornographic photo album, so many different acts and positions to choose from, so many toys to play with. Nigel had thought about all of them over the past week, every tiny thing he could possibly do with Will. But there was one that had always stood out. The one position he imagined most often when he was touching himself.

Nigel rubbed his hand over Will’s completely shaved thigh. His legs were smooth to the touch, softer even than any female’s he had ever been with._ How does he get his skin so smooth?_

“Want you to ride me,” he said softly into Will’s ear. “In your skirt. Such a pretty girl riding my cock.”

“Have you been thinking about that this week? About me riding you?” He pet Nigel’s face.

Nigel nodded. He didn’t want to admit he’d been getting himself off to that image of Will ever since their first meeting, but he was willing to come clean about that.

Will’s hand on Nigel’s thigh traveled between the man’s legs, petting and squeezing gently, licking his lips and looking into Nigel’s eyes. “I’ve been missing this. So big and thick. Gunna look so pretty under my skirt…stretching me open.”

Nigel groaned. Whether Will was lying or not, whether it was a ploy or not, he didn’t care. The words were driving him insane.

Will unbuckled and unzipped Nigel’s pants blindly and shifted his clothes about until his cock was out of his pants and Will’s hand was wrapped around him. He bent forward a bit to dribble a line of spit to the tip of Nigel’s cock to add wetness before beginning to stroke him. Nigel’s hips twitched up, a moan on his lips as the boy touched him.

Nigel focused on Will’s face for a moment, the little panting breaths from Will’s lips as he stroked him made him throb even harder in the boy’s grasp. He glanced down to watch the filthy show, his cock sliding wet and hot in and out of the boy’s hold. He’d been waiting for that touch again all week, his body tingling all over, already coursing with the desire to climax.

Will stilled his hand against Nigel’s pelvis, holding his cock up straight and that’s when Nigel saw the boy’s tattoo. He hadn’t noticed it during their first meeting. It was a small cursive ‘H’ on the space between his thumb and index finger on the top of his hand. Nigel’s stomach plummeted, going from a feeling of euphoria quickly down to a feeling of despair, as if on the first drop of a rollercoaster. He knew what that letter stood for, and Will was marked with the man’s initial. Nigel closed his eyes willing the sight away, not wanting it to ruin their time together. He’d been waiting all week.

Will’s mouth dissipated all of the negative feelings, his head ducking and his tongue and lips began playing around Nigel’s leaking cock head causing him to groan, quickly running his fingers through Will’s soft long curls and tugging.

“Fuck,” he panted. “Baby, too much. Too much.”

Nigel felt an odd sensation on the tip and Will’s hand was rolling down. When he pulled back Nigel saw Will had rolled a condom down onto him using his mouth. God damn if that wasn’t talent.

“Back against the headboard,” Will directed him, nodding his head where he wanted him.

Nigel scooted back on the bed, ridding himself of his pants and shirt in the process. Will undid his white shirt, leaving it on but fully open and taking his panties off but keeping the skirt on as well. He met Nigel at the top of the bed, quickly straddling him, making a show of himself, running his fingers through his hair, rolling his hips and doing a little dance for the man. Nigel gripped Will’s hips, running his fingers over Will’s stomach, toying playfully with the charm hanging from the boy’s belly button.

“You want it, don’t you?” Nigel sighed. “Want my cock so badly.”

Will nodded, licking his lips. Nigel reached behind the boy to pet at his hole which was already soaked with lube. Already prepped for him. “So wet for me, gorgeous. Such a wet little pussy. Need me to fill you up, hm?”

Will nodded. “Yeah…”

Nigel slid a finger in, the lubricant dripped down Will’s thighs at the movement.

“No, your cock, please. I’m all ready for you.”

Nigel roughly gripped Will’s hip and yanked him even closer with a groan, settling him directly over his cock. Will ground himself down on it, wanting it inside so badly. Nigel pressed the tip inside and Will bunched up his skirt, holding it with his white-knuckled grasp as he slowly lowered himself down onto him. His own cock hard and leaking.

Nigel sighed as Will lowered himself, Will’s eyes remained closed, focused on relaxing as the thick cock filled him. “That’s it,” he cooed. “Nice and slow. So tight, baby.” He pet Will’s soft sides.

Will let out a whimper and his thighs trembled as soon as he had Nigel fully inside.

“Good girl,” he cooed. “Ride me, baby,” his hands guided Will’s hips, encouraging him to do so.

Will rolled his hips forward, lifting and dropping himself gently, fucking himself on Nigel’s thick cock. He let his skirt fall back down as he gripped Nigel’s shoulders for support. He whined, finally opening his eyes again to look into Nigel’s.

“The most beautiful eyes,” Nigel pet Will’s face. “All blown out in pleasure for me, hm? My cock causing those pretty sounds,” he tapped on Will’s lips, still spilling with whimpers.

Will nodded, pressing his face against Nigel’s palm with a nuzzle.

“God wanna take a picture of you like this.”

“Go ahead,” Will said, his voice soft and breathy. He lifted his skirt from the back. “Right here, wanna see what we look like…connected.”

“God damn,” Nigel reached for his phone, and positioned it behind Will’s body to take a picture of Will’s hole stretched around him, his skirt still visible. He looked at it himself before showing Will, his favorite curse word on his lips again.

Will, bit his lip and began fucking himself faster. “Take a video.”

“That allowed?”

“They’re encouraged,” Will sighed, a small airy chuckle ending his words.

Nigel obeyed, taking a video from behind. Will made a point of making his noises louder, as if putting on a show for the camera, pushing out his ass into more of a curve, showing off.

“Made for this,” Nigel said under his breath, more to himself than Will.

Nigel recorded for thirty seconds before he felt too close to the edge and stopped filming, dropping his phone and gripping Will’s soft hips again, the material of the boy’s shirt tickling the tops of his hands.

“You gonna watch that video on your own a lot, huh? Gunna get yourself off thinking about me. Yeah?”

Will’s dirty words were sending Nigel over the edge.

“Fucking little porn star,” Nigel chuckled. “Fuck yeah I will.”

“That gets me off,” Will sighed, positioning himself just so and slamming himself back down onto Nigel’s cock, falling forward and coming onto Nigel’s chest, whining and trembling. Nigel gripped the boy against him, wrapping his arms around him, hugging him tightly, his hips fucking up into the boy’s heat as he came into the condom.

* * *

“How do you get your legs so fucking smooth?” Nigel said, dancing the tips of his fingers and his palm against Will’s thigh. Will’s leg was draped over Nigel’s body as they lay together, his head on Nigel’s inner shoulder as the man’s arm was wrapped around him. Their breaths had slowed, they had thirty minutes left on the clock to themselves, just to talk.

“Laser hair removal,” Will said. “Partial electrolysis. Got it done everywhere. Fucking hate the feeling of body hair. It helps with my…never mind,” he chuckled, shaking his head.

“What were you going to say?” Nigel said, moving hair behind Will’s ear.

“You don’t want to hear about it,” Will said with a meek smile. “Trust me. It’s not what you paid for,” he ran his fingers through Nigel’s chest hair.

“I want to get to know you,” Nigel said. “You can tell me.”

Will looked into Nigel’s eyes, shocked that he sounded genuine. Nobody ever wanted to talk, especially clients. He didn’t want to scare this one off with his problems and baggage, but he had a sense that he couldn’t scare Nigel away. The way Nigel looked at him…there was no way. He was just a warm body to most men, but with Nigel, he felt different. He felt human.

It was a nice feeling, one he hadn’t felt in a long time.

He took a deep breath before speaking. “Do you know the term ‘gender dysphoria’?”

Nigel eyebrows furrowed in confusion, shaking his head gently.

Will began mentally backing up again when Nigel nudged him, his thumb was caressing the skin of Will’s shoulder. His eyes were soft, he was truly curious.

“Well, I have it,” Will said, his eye contact breaking for a moment out of fear, focusing on his hand on Nigel’s chest. “It’s much more complicated than just wearing women’s clothing and feeling feminine at times. It’s…if you want me to stop talking about this I will, I don’t want to…”

“No,” Nigel said. “No, no, I’m interested. I want to hear all about it.”

Will’s heart fluttered in his chest. Not even Hannibal liked discussing his dysphoria, always sweeping it under the rug. Abiding by his preferred gender of the day or moment, but not much else. It seemed almost like a burden to him sometimes. Hannibal never said anything negative about it and loved his wardrobe, but Hannibal didn’t enjoy talking about anything other than sex, fine dining, art, and classical music, which Will had accepted a long time ago. Hannibal still loved him with all his heart, he knew that much was true, and he loved Hannibal in return. He just wasn’t a big talker, which was okay.

“I feel like a girl and boy all at the same time. Some days one more than the other, but mostly it’s right down the middle. It really is different with everyone. It’s on the non-binary spectrum, which is under the transgender umbrella. It’s a whole…” he gestured with his hand in a circle, swallowing nervously. “Thing.”

“Would you want to transition to being female?” Nigel’s voice was soft, curious, no ounce of malice in his words.

“No,” Will said, shaking his head. “I’m very happy with my body and my…parts,” he smiled. “I just have this overwhelming femininity about me some days that I want people to see me as a girl, I want to be treated like a woman, viewed as a woman. On those days I _am_ a woman. It’s not about sex, it’s about how I feel within myself. If that makes any sense at all.”

Will had never discussed any of this with anyone before, not at length. It was nice, talking without fear of disapproval. Will had no real connection to Nigel, not yet, so if he left it wouldn’t affect him that deeply. And Nigel was willing to listen, so it was perfect, a free therapy session of sorts. Will got the feeling he could tell Nigel he was an alien from another planet with three hidden heads and he would still be falling over himself to spend time with him.

“But I enjoy being and looking androgynous. You haven’t seen me on a more masculine day yet, I’m like…a completely different person,” he laughed. “You’ve gotten used to this ‘pretty boy’ idea of me. I’d hate for you to be disappointed.”

“Never,” Nigel said.

“I do still go by the pronouns he and him, it is just what I’m comfortable with. It may change down the line but for now…fuck I’m sorry, I’m rambling,” he hid his face in Nigel’s shoulder.

“It’s perfectly alright, sweetheart,” he said at a whisper ducking his face under Will’s to leave a tiny kiss on Will’s earlobe out of view of the cameras.

Will’s body felt warm all over from that kiss, radiating out from his core, as tiny and insignificant as it was. Nigel accepting his gender identity and his dysphoria, his understanding, paired with the guts to kiss his body, knowing it wasn’t allowed, his heart was pounding. He turned to look into Nigel’s eyes, time standing still for just a moment.

The urge to claim Will’s lips was overwhelmingly strong again, but Nigel broke the silence to take his mind off it, knowing he would surely be banned from Desert Rose and Will’s company if he took it that far.

“I would pay thousands to just sit and talk to you for hours,” Nigel sighed. “You don’t need to even touch me. Just want to get inside that beautiful mind,” he tapped on the front of Will’s forehead.

Will smiled. Nobody had ever said something like that to him. There wasn’t a discussion Will had had for the past year that didn’t have sex constantly looming over it.

“You don’t need to pay me for that,” Will said. “I enjoy talking to you,” he blushed. He’d spoken too quickly, knowing something like that was beyond impossible.

“Come out with me for a night, for coffee…some dinner.”

Will shook his head. “No, I can’t.”

“Why?” Nigel looked sad, shot down by those three words.

“Well for one, I don’t have a means of transportation. I go almost everywhere with Hannibal and I have no real reason to leave alone. Also, Hannibal would most definitely view that as cheating. As would I.”

“You’re not allowed to have friends? Hm?” His hand lowered as he gripped Will’s waist.

“Believe it or not, me and Hannibal’s relationship is built on trust. Sex isn’t cheating, but he may view us talking this way as tip-toeing the line of being unfaithful.”

“That’s fucking insane to me.”

“Maybe so, for you,” Will said. “But not for us. I kiss only him, I sleep only in his bed. We’re in love and we have rules. Please respect that.”

“Hey,” Nigel cooed. “I wasn’t pushing it. Don’t be angry.”

Will shook his head. “M’not angry.”

“You sounded it there for a moment,” Nigel said, caressing his knuckle against Will’s smooth face. What he would have given to steal the boy away. But he would never push him, just make his adoration known. Will deserved to feel admired.

Will eyes flickered shut to the sensation of the touch. “M’not.” He looked into Nigel’s eyes again. “M’just sick of people always questioning what Hannibal and I have and whether or not it’s genuine.”

“Hey now. You told me during our last session to stop talking of Hannibal and enjoy the moment and now you’re bringing him up on your own. I think we’re due for a change in the subject. Don’t you?” He could tell talking about Hannibal was a testy subject and if Nigel was honest with himself, even one mention of the man’s name made him want to vomit, a seething jealous anger circled the man’s name like a pack of rabid hyenas. He would have liked never to hear it again.

Will nodded. “Please.”

“Do you want to ask me anything?”

Will sat and thought for a moment, staring up at the ceiling.

“What is your accent? M’just curious of where you’re from.”

Nigel chuckled. “Here and there. Mostly Romanian.”

“I was hoping you’d joke around and say some bullshit answer like that your accent was Irish or something,” Will laughed.

“I leave the smart ass remarks to you,” Nigel winked.

Will shrugged. “Of which I am the King.”

“And the Queen,” Nigel pet Will’s blushed face with his palm.

“Let me see that picture you took again,” Will gestured for Nigel’s phone which he quickly provided.

Will made himself busy with the phone, finding the photo on his own before handing the device back to Nigel. “Now you won’t be able to forget me.”

Will had made Nigel’s phone background the photo of Nigel’s cock inside him, the skirt bunched up around his waist from behind as he rode him. His cock halfway inside his hole as he was mid bounce. The photo was a bit blurry but it served its purpose.

Nigel laughed seeing what he had done. “As if I ever could.” Nigel smiled again before clicking his display off and returning his attention to Will. “Thank you. As if I wasn’t already horny enough daily. This will get me right up in the morning.”

Will beamed a big, cartoonish, pleased-with-himself smile. They both laughed, their mirth trickling into silence for a while before Nigel broke it. He nodded toward the camera in the corner.

“Do you think someone is watching us right now?”

“Someone always watches the cameras,” Will said, his voice suddenly a bit sleepy but very matter-of-fact.

“Obviously this is okay then?” Nigel said, his thumb softly petting Will’s shoulder again. “Me holding you this way?”

Will nodded. “It doesn’t happen often, but it does happen. I’ve laid this way with dozens of men.”

Nigel’s stomach dropped, once again reminded there was nothing special about him in Will’s eyes.

“Just didn’t want to risk getting my throat slit in the parking lot,” Nigel chuckled. “I’m relieved now.”

“If it wasn’t allowed you-know-who would’ve barged through that door ten minutes ago.”

“Why didn’t he watch us this time?”

The conversation was dipping back into Hannibal territory. Nigel accepted it, knowing a conversation with him and Will would sometimes if not always revolve around Hannibal. At least within the walls of Desert Rose. Which gave him even more incentive to convince Will to meet him outside of the brothel, somewhere else eventually.

“Busy,” Will said. “I remember him talking this morning about a whole day of Skype interviews for new boys to come here. He had thirty interviews lined up, but he can only pick three of them. He’ll probably narrow it down and ask my opinion on the last ten, as he always does. Plus, he doesn’t typically observe after a client’s first time. Usually there as a safety precaution. Especially with me.”

“Well, you’re precious cargo,” Nigel said. “Can’t blame him.”

He stared at Will, studying his face, memorizing his features until their next meeting.

Will looked into Nigel’s eyes, his heart beating a little faster than normal under the man’s heavy gaze. The sensation scared him, jolting him into action. He needed to make a joke, needed to take the focus of the unspoken mutual bond they were slowly stitching together.

“We have five minutes left,” Will said sitting up and getting onto his knees, sitting back on his legs. “Any last things you wanna do to me? The clock is ticking.” He began humming the Jeopardy theme song, clapping his hands against his thighs.

Nigel chuckled, sitting up to mirror Will’s energy, the blanket slipping off his lower half. “Five minutes, huh? Think I can come again in five minutes.” He stroked himself, he was almost fully hard again.

“Bet you can’t,” Will said, tongue in cheek with raised eyebrows.

“Oh now I’m fucking determined,” Nigel said, stroking himself faster. He reached for Will’s thigh who shifted back out of reach.

“Without touching me,” Will said with a smirk. “Expert mode.”

“Fuck,” Nigel sighed. “Okay. At least show me a little…”

Will laid back on the bed, lifting his legs back, spreading himself open. His fingers pet at his hole, teasing the tip of his index finger in and out as he stared up at Nigel. “That enough for you?”

“Fuck yeah,” Nigel teased his cock head with the pad of his thumb on every upstroke. “Say my name. Say my fucking name, baby.”

“Nigel,” Will sighed, pressing his finger in deeper. He whined, his head falling back for a moment before making eye contact with him again.

Nigel’s legs trembled and he groaned. “Fuck me, baby. Such a pretty hole.”

Will added a second finger to his hole and with that image and Will’s quivering lower lip, Nigel went over the edge, bucking forward and coming onto the sheets. He collapsed sideways onto the pillow, continuing to stroke himself through his aftershocks, his eyes closed and moaning. He gasped when he felt Will’s hand shove his own out of the way to stroke him. Nigel’s hips bucked up. “Fuck.”

Will shushed him softly. “That was impressive,” he moved Nigel’s hair back from his sweaty forehead. “For an old man.”

Nigel chuckled, playfully pushing against Will’s chest. He circled his hand around Will’s and pulled it off his overly sensitive cock. The alarm on the wall sounded, a dull beeping signaling their session had come to an end.

“See you next week?” Will said, his voice hopeful.

Nigel nodded. “You bet your ass.”

* * *

In a room of black and white monitors, sat a man. His eyes glued to one screen in particular, his hand over his clothed cock, squeezing and teasing himself through the fabric to the same rhythm of Will’s hand squeezing and petting the man on the monitor. His boy was candy to the men, and he was proud to call him his. Will was his little trophy, he loved flaunting him, loved seeing other men falling over themselves at the mere sight of his striking beauty. 

Hannibal could see the look in Will’s newest regular clients’ eyes. It was well beyond a look of lust.

While Hannibal knew for a fact Will would never leave him, he was too lovesick, too much of a little puppy following him around, too dependent on him, this particular client’s eyes were a threat. Hannibal would be watching _ that one _ closely, making sure he didn’t cross any boundaries. Damn his boy for being too addicting. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A flashback showing Will acclimating to the brothel.

**One Year Earlier **

“You okay, baby?” Hannibal said, nuzzling his face in Will’s neck, kissing him there and holding his waist tight. His thumb caught on the bottom of Will’s t-shirt riding the material up just slightly to leave gentle caresses there in the soft skin of Will’s side. “You’ve been quiet today.”

Will was sitting sideways across Hannibal’s lap in the high-backed corner chair of the brothel den area. The den was for brothel staff only and it was where all the boys and Hannibal typically retired to after the place was closed for the evening to bond and hang out.

Desert Rose was a day brothel, giving Hannibal and the boys nights off and time to relax and play with each other. Sometimes innocently, sometimes not so innocently. Usually the latter. One of the boys was currently on a stripper pole putting on a tipsy dancing show while the others threw fake Monopoly money at him as they hooted, hollered, and jeered. 

“If you moved like that sober you’d have more regulars!”

“I move better than your mom!”

“You wish!”

“Take the bundle of socks out of those briefs, you’re not foolin’ anyone!” The boys burst into laughter.

“You’re all assholes.” 

“At least the clients like mine!” 

Will turned to address Hannibal, his hand going up to run his fingers through the man’s silver-streaked hair and twirl his finger in the ones hanging down and touching the base of his neck. He nodded. “Just tired.”

“Go to sleep, darling. I’m taking you shopping again tomorrow.”

Will shook his head, knowing Hannibal was trying to send Will off to the bed alone so he could fool around with the other boys. He hadn’t been there long but he knew that all too well. “I’m fine. Wanna stay here with you.”

“Very well,” Hannibal kissed the side of Will’s forehead and held him close.

Will had been living at the brothel for a week. None of the boys had tried to talk to him, not at length anyway, for which Will was secretly grateful. He preferred his space. Will didn’t like acting fake, or suffering through small talk. Such was a major pet peeve of his. He didn’t see a point in it. Will was there for Hannibal and Hannibal only, he didn’t have an interest in becoming friends with the boys or taking part in their silly games of joking deprecation.

Some of the boys had made it a point to outwardly display their distaste for Will, blatantly obviously jealous of Hannibal’s affinity for him, side-eyeing him in the hallways, making snide comments under their breaths. Will wasn’t stupid, he knew none of the boys liked him, which was just fine because he didn’t care for them either, in any capacity. He didn’t need their approval. If anything it was amusing to him, to be Hannibal’s main and watch the others seethe with anger, wishing they were in his place. Sleeping in Hannibal’s bed, kissing his lips. They all hated him. It made Will laugh.

Hannibal may fuck them on occasion but they would never have Daddy’s heart, not like Will did.

The brothel atmosphere had been shocking for the first day or two but the environment had quickly grown on him. His acclimation of being constantly surrounded by sex came quickly and while he wasn’t ready just yet to sell his body, he wasn’t bothered. A change in scenery and dissipation of financial and educational stress freed his mind, causing his art and creativity to flourish more than it ever had. He’d drawn more in the past week than the entire past year of art school.

As promised, Hannibal had taken him shopping, buying him thousands of dollars of art supplies and clothing. Will had difficulty at first accepting such lavish gifts but Hannibal made it clear it gave him joy to spoil Will, saying such was akin to orgasm, watching Will’s face light up, to watch the cogs in his sweet boy’s mind turning with possibilities of his new supplies and wardrobe.

“You’ll look beautiful in that,” Hannibal said, kissing his boy’s earlobe from behind, his arms wrapped around Will’s waist from behind in the specialty department store. His hand reaching up to pet the soft material of the lacy lingerie with his fingers. “Get one in every color.”

Will whipped his head to the side, his eyebrows furrowed. “I can’t,” looking at the price tag. “It’s too much.” 

“What’s my name?” Hannibal said, swaying their bodies side to side.“Hmm?”

“Daddy,” Will said softly, breathing out the word rather than speaking it.

“That’s right,” he praised. “One in every color. Like Daddy says. I’m fucking you in the red one tonight, and tomorrow I’m taking you out to dinner with the black one secretly on underneath your clothes. You’ll suck me off in the car beforehand. But you won’t get to release yourself. Gonna, keep you nice and pent up over our meal, knowing you’re wearing this underneath. They’re soft. Hmm?”

Will nodded, a slave to Hannibal’s words and the way he spoke, melting into him. The way Hannibal’s big strong hands gripped his petite body. He felt owned, and he was drunk off the feeling of it. “Yes, Sir.”

“Good boy.”

Will had filled up his entire new closet with stereotypically female and male clothing and undergarments, the entire room with his art supplies, canvases, paints, sketch pads, charcoals, and pencils of every color and shade. Will kept all of it in his own assigned bedroom. The room Hannibal had told him he would be taking clients in if he ever decided to. Will used the room during the day as his sanctuary to fulfill himself intellectually, experimenting with different clothings and gender expression and the like, spending every evening with Hannibal, getting fucked in and sleeping in the brothel owner’s bed.

It had been just a week and already Will was addicted to the man, constantly craving his company and wanting to be on his arm. He enjoyed being shown off, flaunted in front of the other boys and everyone in public, he was obsessed with being the candy, sweet and succulent, on the gorgeous and rich older man’s arm.

However, sharing Hannibal’s affection was difficult, much more difficult than Will had initially anticipated. Will knew Hannibal slept with the other boys, and he tried to block it out, but the fact was thrust into his face at every possible turn.

Hannibal touched the other boys in front of him, sweet greetings with his hand on their lower backs, winks as he moved throughout the brothel, whispers of planned rendezvous. Will reminded himself he was the only one who shared Daddy’s bed, the only one allowed to kiss his mouth, and after his first round of STD testing came back with an all-clear he would be the only one allowed to fuck Hannibal raw.

A month passed and Will’s life was better than he could’ve ever fathomed. He had a man who treated him like a diamond, like a precious metal, constantly doting on him. He had all the time in the world to experiment with himself, his body, and his art. While things weren’t perfect, Will couldn’t imagine it getting much better.

“You’re special,” Hannibal would say to him when they were alone. “You’re so much better than all of them. They’re nothing compared to you, darling.” He would whisper as he thrust into Will, kissing his neck and licking and mouthing at his sweaty clavicle.

“Yeah?” Will’s vocal cords vibrated Hannibal’s kissing lips as he spoke.

Hannibal would nod, digging his nails into Will’s plump thighs as he increased his pace. “God damn you’re tight, baby. You were waiting for me all along, hmm? Waiting to show you how you should be treated?”

Will nodded, his long hair covering half his face while his face was drawn in ecstasy.

“You love my cock? Made for you. Your hole made for me. My little fuck toy. All mine.”

Will groaned, scratching Hannibal’s back arching closer against him. He loved when Hannibal talked to him while they fucked, his words drove him wild, the way the man spoke, the dirty things he said, went straight to his cock. He loved Hannibal owning him, and telling him he’s owned, fucking loved it. He didn’t remember what life was before Hannibal owned him and his body, he never wanted to. It had been a month and already Will couldn’t see himself without the man in his life.

Will felt himself getting close, Hannibal’s words coaxing him to the edge. He reached for his cock between their bodies to help himself over when Hannibal’s hand gripped Will’s hand, halting his reach. He took Will’s other hand in his and held them both up next to Will’s head, balanced on his forearms as he continued fucking into the boy. “No, darling. You need to learn to come without touching. When you start with the clients they’re going to want that of you.”

Hannibal frequently said things like that, about how _ when _ Will started taking clients what they would like. The fantasy of it was titillating, fucking strangers for his man, the teasing dirty words and imagining it all made Will’s heart pound harder, but the reality of it scared him still.

Hannibal had told Will he wouldn’t have to take clients for a long time, if ever, and yet he mentioned it daily. Will began to fear he was wearing out his welcome, or would with time. Surely he would need to take clients if he was to stay at the brothel, in Hannibal’s arms and good graces. Will wasn’t stupid, he knew what needed to be done. There was no time stamp but Will knew what was expected of him. It was blatantly obvious. The promise of not having to take clients was a mere formality, politeness. It was never something set in stone. He didn’t want to let Hannibal down or anger him. Risk getting thrown out on his ass. He would need to push himself past his comfort zone. Make Hannibal proud. If he was to keep the roof over his head.

Will knew Hannibal cared about him deeply, but he didn’t want to do anything that could jeopardize their relationship. And continuing to push off taking clients would surely do that.

“Come for me, sweetheart. Without touching. Show Daddy you can.” Hannibal’s hips moved faster, fucking Will into his mattress. Will’s legs wrapped around Hannibal’s waist, his hands gripping his, their fingers laced, as he looked up and into his eyes. He’d never before come like this, but if anyone was going to draw it out of him, it was his love.

Will’s eyes shut and he let out a loud whine, arching his back off the bed, as he came untouched all over his chest. Hannibal followed immediately after spilling into Will, raw. He collapsed on top of Will kissing his mouth lazily through their panting breaths, keeping himself buried inside as they came down from their collective high.

Will clutched at Hannibal’s arms and shoulders looking up into his eyes. “I love you.” He sighed.

Over the past month, Will had fallen and fallen hard. He didn’t want to embarrass himself by saying the words too soon but he needed to get them out. They’d been clawing at his throat from the inside for weeks. He held his breath, terrified of what Hannibal’s reaction would be.

Hannibal smirked, moving Will’s long sweaty hair from his face to kiss his lips again. “Mm…do you?” He pet Will’s face with his palm on his cheek, thumb near his mouth.

Will nodded frantically. “I do. I love you.” He claimed Hannibal’s lips with his again.

“I suppose I feel the same, darling.” Hannibal rested his forehead against Will’s. Will let out a soft sound between a cry and a whine as he clung to Hannibal’s arms and buried his face in his love’s neck. He had finally found a home, somewhere where he was loved. He couldn’t lose it. He would do anything. Not to lose it.

“I think I’m ready,” Will whispered. 

“Ready?”

“To take clients,” Will pet Hannibal’s face. “I want to make you happy.”

Hannibal smirked, pleased beyond comprehension. Devilish. “That’s a good boy.”

“Will you be with me the whole time?”

“Of course, my darling. I insist on it.”

As promised, Hannibal was with Will the entire time. Will’s first client was a handsome middle-aged man who was quiet but kind and gentle. He wanted to make Will feel good rather than the other way around which made it all such an easy transition to selling his body.

Hannibal laid behind Will, both of their bodies propped against a pillow. Will’s back was against Hannibal’s chest as his love held his legs back giving the client access to lick his hole as he touched himself, rubbing himself against the sheets.

“This isn’t so bad, is it, darling?” Hannibal kissed Will’s neck and earlobe. 

Will shook his head, turning to look into Hannibal’s eyes before kissing him. His body twitched through the pleasure the client was giving to him.

The man paid to eat him out for half an hour and afterward Will was a thousand dollars richer. He was addicted.

Over the next few months, Will met with dozens of clients, developed a rapport with multiple of them, taking some of the best ones as regulars. Hannibal, his love, was always at his side with first meetings, taking photos of the filth for the brothel website, and serving as moral support for his brothel’s newest attraction.

“You’ll only fuck men you’re attracted to. No matter the money they offer. You’re too pretty to have an ugly dick in you, baby.” Hannibal told him.

The money soon became addicting. That paired with seeing how hot it made Hannibal, to watch him sell his body. Will tried not to come during client meetings unless a client specifically wanted it. A lot of the time Will held off his release until the very end of the day when he could retire to his bedroom with Hannibal to let it all out with him.

Will became the face of Desert Rose, to the chagrin and jealously of the other boys. The majority of them still hated Will and openly picked on and teased him when Hannibal wasn’t around. Knowing better than to do it around Daddy. Anyone who was caught talking rudely to Hannibal’s precious Will would surely get kicked out of Desert Rose to never return.

Will ignored the boys, knowing they were all just bitter. Will had found a single friend in one of the prostitutes, Randall. He was a year older than Will and he was rumored to have the best mouth under Desert Rose’s roof. He didn’t live at the brothel but one weekend a month as he was still a full-time student, but they kept in touch through text while he was away.

Randall vaguely reminded Will of Matthew, which Will repressed. Still livid at his old best friend for what he had done to him. But if Matthew hadn’t abandoned him, Will wouldn’t have come to Desert Rose, wouldn’t have found his love in Hannibal. It was all for the best, he thought.

Selling his body made Will more relaxed when it came to witnessing Hannibal sleep with the other boys. Will was fucking other men so it no longer seemed so unbalanced. It still ate at him, but with a slower speed and force, previously it had been a lawnmower through an overgrown field violently ripping and tearing at the foliage and weeds and now it was like an ant munching on a single leaf.

Frequently Will retired to he and Hannibal’s shared bedroom for the evening to find Hannibal in their bed fucking one of the other boys. Will didn’t bat an eye and simply walked over, bending to kiss Hannibal on the lips short and chaste.

“Have a good day, darling?” Hannibal would ask as he pounded into the boy beneath him. 

“It was alright. I’ll tell you about it after my shower,” Will would smile and head for the bathroom. 

Afterward, he wrapped himself in a towel grabbing his drawing pad to sit on the other side of the bed as Hannibal continued fucking the boy, grateful for the memory foam so the motion of the men next to him wouldn’t disrupt his pencil strokes. After Hannibal and the boy came, the boy, whomever it was that evening would leave without a word and Hannibal would cuddle up to Will’s side, kissing his bare shoulder watching him draw.

“Why are you squinting?”

“Hmm?” Will turned distracted.

“Do you need glasses?”

Will nodded and chuckled. “Yeah, probably. I had them in high school but they broke. My dad never bought me another pair.” 

“I’m taking you to the eye doctor tomorrow. Going to purchase you a nice new pair.”

Will smiled. “You sure that’s wise? With glasses, I’ll be able to see just how old you are. I might leave.” He shrugged, teasing him.

“You’ll stay for the money,” Hannibal said with a smirk. “And you know it.”

Will nudged Hannibal. “Have a sense of humor, old man.”

Hannibal traced Will’s lips. “Wanna fuck that smart mouth.”

“Haven’t you already had enough tonight?” Will raised an eyebrow.

“Never enough,” Hannibal said. “C’mere.”

Will placed his drawing pad on the bedside table and moved down to the bed so he was nuzzled between Hannibal’s legs. Hannibal rid himself of the used condom from his tryst with the boy and combed his fingers through Will’s long hair beckoning him closer.

“Kiss it, baby.” 

Will left a hot open-mouth kiss on the tip of Hannibal’s cock, wrapped his hand around him to stroke the foreskin down to have better access to kiss and lick, keeping eye contact on Hannibal the whole time.

“I love you, daddy.” Will sighed in between pecks and traces of tongue.

“Take me in.” He pressed down on Will’s head wanting him deeper. Will obliged lowering himself down easily on him, drooling at the sides, wet and messy. “This is my mouth…hmm? I only loan it out sometimes. My biggest moneymaker.” Hannibal sighed and bucked up to fuck Will’s mouth, tracing his lips stretched around him with his fingers. 

Will nodded minutely. He loved being Daddy’s whore. Loved making him proud. He didn’t think he could ever get tired of it. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s Halloween Night at the brothel. Will puts on a little show for his man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is the shortest yet but it’s my personal favorite thus far!

**Present Day **

It was Halloween night at the brothel. The open hours during the day were business as usual, men constantly coming and going, but as soon as night fell the doors were locked and the fun started. The place had been decorated for the past week with faux cobwebs over the bar, bloody hand-print decals all over the walls, and the fiberglass mannequin with a huge dangling cock in the corner of the den that the boys had nicknamed Beau was decorated and dressed as a pirate, eye patch over his cock head to cover his “one eye”.

All the boys, as well as Hannibal, were dressed up for the brothel cast party, from costumes such as a slutty Mummy, a werewolf complete with a fake fox-tail butt plug, and a sultry version of a Silent Hill nurse.

Hannibal was dressed as a vampire, complete with cape, black slacks, and white button-up flecked with stage blood. Will was a witch complete with a tiny glittery-black witch hat that clipped to his hair like a bauble on the top and thick black eyeliner making his blue eyes pop even more than usual. The majority of his costume was kept a secret, covered by a thin black robe that he planned on shedding later at the opportune moment. Not even Hannibal knew what his full outfit was.

“It’s a surprise,” Will had said from the other side of their shared bathroom door as he got dressed.

“I bought the costume, my dear. I think I deserve to see it before anyone else.” He busied himself with buttoning his real blood-red ruby cuff links and fiddling with the antler ring he wore every day as he spoke. The ring was his favorite piece of jewelry; a platinum band with a tiny realistic stag face accompanied with antlers as sharp as tiny knifes. Hannibal frequently joked about it being for protection but Will had never witnessed Hannibal using it for anything other than opening letters. 

“You gave me your card at the mall and said ‘Have fun’,” Will said. “I’m doing just that. You can wait. You should’ve come with me instead of trying to recruit the poor guy working at the frozen yogurt place.”

“How should I have known he was married? And was straight?” 

“Maybe his ring was enough of a clue for you? And his shit haircut.”

“It could have been his class ring…” Hannibal sighed.

Will laughed. “It was a plain silver band and he was wearing a cross. You probably propositioned a youth minister, you wicked man.”

“I could have taught him a lot,” Hannibal smirked. “At least he respectfully declined.”

“I’m sure you were in his prayers that evening, my love.”

“I’m far from salvation, you know that much.”

Will opened the door wearing the robe covering his outfit much to the disappointment of Hannibal. He pouted and yanked Will in by the waist. “You know I love a good bad boy,” Will winked.

Hannibal sighed, leaning in to kiss at Will’s neck. He smelled of his newest purchased feminine perfume, notes of vanilla and fresh powder. “How long must I wait to see what you have on underneath this?” He rubbed his palm against the silk caressing Will’s back with the soft material before gripping the silk belt with a veiny hand.

Will pushed his hand down away from the belt with a half-hearted laugh, eyes-closed focused on the feeling of Daddy’s lips and tongue moving against his clavicle and throat.

“Have some patience, you’ll be glad you did.”

* * *

“Go get Daddy a drink, darling,” Hannibal said into Will’s ear. They had been sat together on their corner chair in the den, Will sideways on Hannibal’s lap, for the past half hour watching the party. The main lights were out, multiple different colored lights were flashing, music was blasting, and a spotlight illuminated the stage where each boy was taking turns putting on skits, dances, and sex shows. One of the boys dressed as a football player complete with helmet had just finished a Magic Mike type dance to Pony by Genuine that ended in him rubbing off against the stage.

“Unoriginal!” One of the boys yelled.

“Fuck off, Ashton.”

Hannibal had spent the past half hour trying to rub up Will’s robe to give himself a sense of what his pretty boy had on underneath, to no avail. Will kept pushing his hand down and wagging his finger.

“What do you want to drink?” Will said, twirling his finger in Hannibal’s short hair.

“Wine,” Hannibal said. “Cabernet, please.”

Will nodded and got up to retrieve it from the open bar in the other room. By the time Will walked back into the den Hannibal had another boy on his lap. The boy was dressed like a cheap version of a gender-swapped Dorothy with baby blue and white checkered shorts with red bows on the sides and nothing else. Hannibal spread the boy’s legs from behind and was rubbing on the boy’s bulge and talking into his ear, completely ignorant of Will’s presence. 

Will placed Hannibal’s wine down and smirked to himself.

_ Showtime. _

He located the DJ Hannibal had hired and requested his song before taking the stage. In moments all eyes were on Will. The sultry introduction of _ I Put A Spell On You _ covered by Annie Lenox started and Will’s body began to move.

He clutched the pole and walked around it once, slowly to the beat, until his back was to the crowd. He rolled his hips in a circle, lifting his robe just a bit above his cheeks for a second to tease, turning his head to send a wink Hannibal’s direction. 

_ I put a spell on you. _

Will turned and pressed the pole between his shoulder blades, using it for balance, before dipping down into a squat with his legs open. His head was tilted back, his lips pouty and full. His eyes full of lust, lost in the music. He rubbed his thighs bringing the material up a bit again but still not showing much.

_ Because you’re mine. _

The room had fallen silent except for the music as the mouths of all the boys stood agape watching Will’s show. Will couldn’t see Hannibal’s face clearly from across the room with the spotlight on him but he could tell he was staring in his direction. Of course, he was. How could he not? Will smirked.

_ You better stop the things you do. _

Will slid back up the pole, standing from his squat and rubbing himself over his robe, squeezing his legs together once he was upright again. He didn’t take his eyes off of Hannibal’s direction as he moved his hips. This was all for him.

_ I tell you, I ain’t lying. I ain’t lying. _

Will stood to the side and rubbed himself against the pole, pressing the side of his face against the cold steel bar, gasping and whining at the feeling of the phallic structure, so large and thick slipping against his cock over the silk.

_ You know I can’t stand it. You runnin’ around. _

Will walked around the pole again as he undid his fabric belt, but continued to hold the material close. He stood facing the crowd, dipping down into a cute little shimmy and a smile before he opened his robe and dropped it to the floor.

_ You know better, Daddy. _

Will was wearing an outfit of string. Velvet black strings crisscrossed and open, leaving nothing to the imagination. The brassiere had strings radiating from around his nipples and the panties were nothing at all, his cock was half-hard and fully exposed between a large triangle of string. A little gold ring cinched the top of the panties together, resting right below his belly button.

_ I cannot stand it ‘cos you put me down. _

Will turned to show off his ass that too was fully out between pieces of string, holding the pole and wiggling back and forth, the flesh jiggling from the movement. He stuck his index finger in his mouth to suck on, trailing his finger up between his cheeks and spreading himself for the room.

_ I put a spell on you. _

Will faced the crowd again slowly, strutting down the stairs toward Hannibal’s direction, running his hand through his long silky hair, his eyes narrowed, a bite to his bottom lip. By the time Will was close enough to make out Hannibal’s shocked and aroused face he could see his man’s pupils were completely blown out and he was eyeing Will like a juicy medium-rare steak, nearly salivating from the sight of him.

Hannibal blindly knocked the boy sat on his lap onto the ground with a loud thud, not bothering to look down and make sure he was okay. Will was hypnotizing.

_ Because you’re mine. _

Will pointed at Hannibal and winked.

_ All mine. _

Will turned and sat himself down on Hannibal’s lap, leaning back and grinding his ass against Hannibal’s crotch. His cock was fully hard beneath his slacks. Will and Hannibal looked into each other’s eyes, and Will rose and dipped, Hannibal’s cock sliding between Will’s cheeks, trapped between the plump flesh over the thin fabric.

_ You know I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you anyhow. _

Hannibal grabbed Will’s face and claimed his lips in a hard kiss full of tongue. Will entertained it for a moment before pulling back to continue his dance.

_ And I don’t care if you don’t want me. _

“Darling,” Hannibal breathed, gripping Will’s hips. Will continued to roll his hips. He knew the entire room’s eyes were on them, which made it all so much hotter. 

_ I’m yours right now. _

Will encircled his own cock and stroked a couple of times to take the edge off but didn’t stay focused there. He could feel Hannibal throbbing underneath him. “Baby.” Hannibal’s shaky voice told Will he was close. Will didn’t take his eyes off Hannibal, but continued to bounce gently and rock a bit harder to the music, putting Hannibal over the edge as he came in his pants.

_ I put a spell on you. Because you’re mine. _

Hannibal grunted and moaned into Will’s ear, digging his fingernails into Will’s flesh as he bucked up.

_ You know I can’t stand it. You’re runnin’ around. You know better, Daddy. _

Will smirked, pleased with himself. He’d had the whole thing planned for weeks.

_ I put a spell on you. Because you’re mine. _

Will claimed Hannibal’s lips in a kiss and they made out until the music ended. Will traced his own half-hard and abandoned cock with a wet fingertip. “Take me to the bedroom, Daddy.”

* * *

After Hannibal finished again in Will’s ass he ate him out nice and slow, tasting himself leak out of his trophy boy. Will, who had been pent up since he’d gotten dressed in the sinful outfit finally let himself go, angling his cock down and streaking Hannibal’s face with his release. Hannibal didn’t let up, continuing to lick and fuck him with his tongue through Will’s quivering orgasm.

Will tugged Hannibal up and close so he could kiss his lips and collect his own come from Daddy’s cheeks, joining their mouths again and tasting one another at the same time.

“Happy Halloween, Daddy,” Will breathed against Hannibal’s wet lips.

* * *

Hours ago when Will had first gotten dressed he had taken a few selfies in the mirror in his string outfit to send out to his regular clients. He took a few photos from different angles. One from behind with his legs spread in the mirror. One from the front where his cock was visible. And another of his face with his finger in his mouth, lips wrapped tight around the digit, eyes big, wide, and begging. He sent the photos through email to all of his closest regulars along with a message. Such things were encouraged of the boys at Desert Rose, it brought in business. It was the best form of free advertising.

“_ Hiya! Will from Desert Rose here. This is what I wore to our private Halloween party here at the brothel tonight. I hope you enjoy the view and don’t forget to make an appointment with me this November if you haven’t already. My mouth and I will be awaiting you.” _

He included a winking emoji and sent it out to just over twenty men.

* * *

Nigel was at a bar with a few low-life colleagues five beers in when he got the notification on his phone informing him of a new email. He ashed his cigarette with one hand and took another drag as he opened the application and his heart did somersaults seeing who it was from. His buddies were shooting the shit telling some stupid fucking jokes and ignoring him so he opened it there at the table and let out an audible groan, eyes bugging out.

He snubbed his cigarette out and excused himself to the restroom. It only took a few strokes once inside the stall, staring at the photos on his phone until he was coming. He rested his head against the stall and shivered, milking every last drop fantasizing Will was on his knees for him right there and then overstimulating him. Rising from the floor and whispering in his ear that he missed him. “Fuck,” Nigel sighed out loud. He couldn’t fucking wait for the next Thursday.

Art by @magpiewendigo on Twitter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen to the Annie Lenox cover version of I Put A Spell On You for this! It’s from the FSOG soundtrack. Those movies aren’t great but the soundtracks are fire.
> 
> The outfit was an actual set of lingerie me and MagpieWendigo saw at Victoria Secret and I just had to write Desert Rose Will in it. They drew him beautifully in it too.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nigel visits Desert Rose again, later everything changes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning for this chapter : Abusive and manipulative relationship, please read with caution if things like that upset you.

“Welcome back to Desert Rose,” the same squirrelly smiling manager said wearing a royal blue suit and tie. “Do you have an appointment this afternoon?” He held his iPad in one arm like before, his fingers covered in many thick rings hovering above it, ready to type.

Nigel nodded, running both hands through his hair. “Ah, yeah.” He slid his empty pack of cigarettes into his pocket with the mental reminder to refill as soon as he left the brothel at the nearest gas station. He’d wanted to have a smoke before seeing Will. The boy’s presence made his heart race; a feeling he had never felt before, at least not when caused by another human. He needed to take some of the edge off, but his pack being empty put a damper on those plans. Nigel was typically a naturally calm man, unless someone or something set him off. Will turned his blood into fire, which always warranted a smoke.

Outside in the parking lot, he had cursed, muttering his favorite word under his breath at the sight of the empty pack. But the excitement of seeing Will again stomped the disappointment out quickly. He hadn’t seen the boy in nearly two weeks and he missed him like crazy. His phone background was still the lewd photo he had taken of the boy during their last tryst. He found himself opening his phone multiple times during the day just to stare at the photo for a quick pick-me-up. 

When Nigel wasn’t working, Will was on his mind. Especially at night. His last word before he fell asleep at night in different cheap hotel beds scattered around Louisiana was always the boy’s name, breathed out between shaky lips, his hand wrapped around himself. He would never admit the fact to anyone, highly embarrassed of his infatuation with the boy who didn’t want him unless he forked over thousands of dollars first.

“Will, again?”

“Yeah,” Nigel nodded, his voice gruff.

Frederick chuckled. “Popular choice.”

Coal in Nigel’s belly ignited at those words.

The man reached his hand out for Nigel’s card. “That’ll be two-thousand even.” 

Nigel quickly provided his card. Any price, in his mind, was far too cheap for Will’s company.

Frederick swiped Nigel’s card and he signed his signature, a stylus on tablet and yet Nigel felt as if he were signing in blood. “Very good. I’ll page him,” Frederick said turning to press the button on the wall.

* * *

Desert Rose as a location had a strange air about it, nearly suffocating to Nigel, and Will was like a garden of flowers, trees, a means of oxygen. Until he joined Nigel and provided air, Nigel felt light-headed and lacking in life force. Nigel knew everything he saw at the brothel was owned by Hannibal, from the fixtures to the people and it gave Nigel an uneasy feeling, a dull pang of nausea deep in his gut. Being alone in the place was miserable. Will took his mind off it. Where was he?

Nigel sat at the bar and ordered a triple scotch, awaiting Will’s arrival. He clutched the glass and overthought everything. Why was he there again? _ Will doesn’t want you. He wants your money. You’re fucking pathetic. _

“Hey,” Nigel heard a voice behind him.

Nigel didn’t turn at first, but closed his eyes, allowing himself to drift into that voice. The voice of his fantasies and dreams. He heard the scrape of a bar stool to his right and a soft hand on his back behind his shoulder. “I missed you. How have you been?”

_ He’s lying. But he God damn he sounds like heaven doing so. _

Nigel opened his eyes and turned to look at Will, his breath catching in his throat at the sight of the boy. He was in a simple navy blue t-shirt and jeans. His long hair was down but he wore a black baseball cap on backward, he wore a masculine scent like something frat boys at college parties wore but ten times more expensive. He looked like the boy next door, the kind of guy any girl would’ve killed for him to ask them to prom. Something was relaxing about it all. Less to impress. More laid back. It felt like home.

“Hey,” Nigel said looking Will up and down.

“Remember what we talked about last time?” Will said, an eyebrow raised, moving some of his hair behind his ear.

Nigel nodded. “Yeah. You look really good.”

“Sorry, I’m not in a skirt with my ass hanging out,” Will chuckled, crossing one of his legs over the other.

“I’ll take you any way I can get you,” he took a pull of his scotch. “I like you however you feel most the comfortable.”

Will blushed. “I never greet guys like this. Ever. I always feel pressured to put on a show. Figured you of all people wouldn’t mind.” He ordered a small tumbler of Diet Coke from the bartender. “Wasn’t particularly in the mood to get dolled up.”

Nigel’s adoration for Will was blatantly obvious. He knew his effect on men, but with Nigel, he felt like he could say anything, do anything, and Nigel would go along with it. Nigel was in deep, and Will liked that. Given their very sexual relationship, Will felt like Nigel was a friend, one that wouldn’t judge him or make him feel pressured to behave in certain ways. He felt completely comfortable showing Nigel his vulnerable side. Not even Hannibal got to see that, but Will kept that tidbit of information to himself. 

“Why don’t you drink?”

“Told you, I’m not old enough,” Will smiled.

Nigel finished a swig of scotch and gave him a look. “I know that,” he chuckled. “But you’re not exactly following the fucking law here.”

”Do you want to get real deep?” Will said. “Want me to spill my guts? Make myself cry talking about my shitty childhood?” He pouted, jokingly.

“I figured it was something like that,” Nigel said, shaking his head and feeling guilty. “I didn’t mean to pry…”

“No,” Will laughed. “Dude. I’m joking.” He laid a hand on Nigel’s knee for a moment. “But yeah, drinking isn’t something I ever want to personally partake in. If you must know, yes it is the classic ‘Dad Was A Drunk’ story and I would rather die than end up like him.” He smiled. “Now,” he nodded his head up. “Finish that drink and we can head back to the bedroom.”

He grabbed his Diet Coke and took a sip, pinky up playfully pretending to be fancy. He winked at Nigel.

_ He’s so fucking cute. _

“Actually,” Nigel said taking a deep breath. “I don’t want to go to the bedroom today.”

Will’s eyebrows furrowed, confused.

“I’d rather just sit out here and talk. If you don’t mind.”

Will shook his head, internalizing what he had just said. The words sinking into his skin and paralyzing him for a moment.

Everything inside Will had stopped working, like a frozen computer, rooting him to the barstool. He didn’t know what to say. No man had ever paid just to talk to him. Especially not for such a ludicrous amount of money. He remembered their last meeting, when Nigel asked him to go with him on an outing for dinner and he had denied him, knowing such was an impossibility. Had he really paid two-grand to sit and talk to him for an hour?

“Wh..why?” Will chuckled, confused about what he was trying to say.

“It’s my money, my time, I’ll spend it how I please. Hmm?” Nigel said laying his hand over Will’s on his glass. He stroked his skin with his thumb. “Just want to talk to you. That okay?”

A chill ran down Will’s spine at the touch. He shook his head, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth with tiny nervous bites, keeping his gaze on their joined hands avoiding eye contact, blushing, his entire body heating up from the intimacy of it all. It was an odd feeling, a calm one, a good one, one Will hadn’t felt for a long time. Not since the good days at art school with Matthew, goofing off in their dorm before settling down and talking for hours.

But this was the next level, someone was paying for his time, his thoughts, not his body. It felt otherworldly, like the brothel setting around them was mere decoration, a setting for two friends to sit and talk. Without sex constantly looming over the conversation, to be fulfilled later. Cut the bullshit, he didn’t need to fake or impress. Nigel just wanted to talk to him. Get to know him.

“We can do that back in the bedroom?” Will said finally looking up. “A little more privacy?”

Nigel laughed. “As much as I want to, I think we wouldn’t get much talking done if we were to go back there. Don’t you agree?” He playfully pinched at Will’s chin with his thumb and inside of his index finger.

Will was acting strangely and Nigel was taken aback by how closed off Will seemed to be to the idea on the surface. He thought the boy would be relieved to have a break. Was talking such a scary concept? Did Will feel like he had nothing to offer except for sex? What had Hannibal done to him? Nigel got the sudden urge to beat the brothel owner’s face in, which was a common fantasy but it was finally warranted.

Will looked him up and down. Nigel was one of his best clients, one of the only clients he genuinely enjoyed fucking. Mostly everyone else was just a tool for getting him pent up to fuck Hannibal at night, a toy so he could later please his man. Nigel made him come with an unfeigned wail every time. He had been looking forward to the meeting that afternoon almost as much as Nigel had himself. But talking did seem nice, he only hoped Hannibal wouldn’t be angry if he found out.

Will traced Nigel’s fingers with the tips of his own, silently fantasizing about them inside him stretching him open so he could take the man’s cock. He saw the tattoos on his fingers for the first time, not having noticed them before. _ I’m the master of my fate, I’m the commander of my soul. _

The only tattoo Will had was the small cursive uppercase_ H _ on the top of his hand between his thumb and index finger. Hannibal had taken him to go get it for their first anniversary. It had been Will’s idea. ”I want people to know I’m yours.” Will had whispered into Hannibal's neck as he rode him in the back of Hannibal’s limo outside the parlor.

“What does this tattoo mean?” Will was curious, petting the words gently with the pads of his fingers.

“You read it?” Nigel’s voice was soft, keeping his tattooed hand in Will’s grasp not moving it away as he took another swig of drink with his opposite hand. 

Will nodded. “I like it.”

“It means just what it says. Nobody can tell me what to do. I steer this ship, I decide what port it pulls into. It’s my life, my decision, nobody else’s,” Nigel spoke very gently, his face close to Will’s as he explained it.

Will continued tracing the words staring down before looking up into Nigel’s eyes. The words of the tattoo resonated deeply within himself. It was always something he wished he had the guts to do, command his fate, but he was never given the means to do so, or the courage. He was happy where he was in life, but sometimes a part of him yearned for more. Though that side of him was buried deep within himself, rarely surfacing, denied.

Nigel noticed a couple of the boys at the end of the bar were staring at him and Will and their joined hands, laughing amongst themselves, snickering to one another. He turned to look for somewhere else they could go to allow them more privacy without going back to the bedroom. “Grab your drink,” Nigel said softly, grabbing his own. He guided Will with his hand on the boy’s lower back as he wheeled them into the connecting room that was abandoned except for themselves, just as it had been the day he and Will had first met.

He sat them both down at the exact booth Will was sat in the first moment he laid eyes on him, sketching mountains. Nigel had never seen someone so aesthetically beautiful and over the past month he had begun to chip away into the boy’s mind, there was still so much more to discover, to learn about the enigma of a young man. He was beautiful on the outside, of course, and Nigel was positive inside he was even more so, gorgeous. His blood was liquid gold to match his 24 karat heart, Nigel was sure of it.

“This is odd,” Will admitted with a laugh, taking a sip of his Diet Coke. “I’d be on my back by now, typically.”

Nigel looked the boy up and down, his arm around the back of the booth behind the boy’s shoulders subconsciously hoping to corral him closer. “You look so fucking pretty on your back,” he grit his teeth. “Fuck this is hard,” he chuckled taking a pull of his scotch again. He felt like a chocolate addict denying himself dessert.

Will leaned to look at Nigel‘s crotch and pouted. “No, it’s not.”

“You little fucking goofball,” Nigel laughed, his face heating up from the alcohol and the company, causing him to blush like a teenage boy. He hadn’t been one of them in a long time, but Will made him feel young again. Carefree, joyous, and silly.

“What is it you do?” Will asked. “You drop two grand to talk to someone you must have a cushy job.”

“What do I look like I do?”

“Well you can’t be a businessman,” Will said scrunching his face in thought, looking Nigel up and down, considering him. He plucked his fingers at the sleeve of Nigel’s Hawaiian shirt, a black short-sleeved button-up with large orange flowers. “A businessman has far better taste in clothing, even to lounge in.”

“I can’t even be offended, because you’re right about that,” Nigel laughed. He never cared about clothing, always choosing comfort over style. The complete opposite of Will’s precious Hannibal who looked like a designer Ken doll at all times.

Will cocked his head. “Yeah, and the tattoos…this one in particular,” he slowly traced the lady on Nigel’s neck. Nigel shivered under the touch, his stomach coiling. “No way you work in an office.” He sat back really thinking. “Are you an artist?”

Nigel laughed, a hearty guffaw. “No,” he shook his head. “Unless you count stick figures as art.”

“Did you win the lottery?”

Nigel kept the joke to himself, that he had won the lottery by meeting Will, but he thought that would be far too corny. “Not yet,” he said with a wink. “Still waiting on that fucking Powerball.”

Will sat back, defeated. “I give up. What do you do?”

Nigel had to think of a way to describe his job without scaring Will. He was the co-leader of a major drug ring. But it was nothing the government didn’t know about, as of the last few years he had been working behind the scenes with higher-ups, meaning he needn’t worry about being incarcerated, but he couldn’t go putting every little detail on blast. He had money in savings, enough that he could retire the next day and be set for life, but for now, he needed to continue. Plus he enjoyed the danger, the travel, and the slight espionage. Nigel was good at what he did, he did what needed to be done, but he hoped he would be able to leave that life reasonably soon, it was putting quite a toll on his mental health and body. He’d been in the business for damn near twenty years and he was ready to put an end to it, maybe start his own business from the ground up. It was a small fantasy he had, something to keep himself going.

“I travel around, meet with people, trade some things, make quick money,” Nigel said, skimping on the details.

“So, you’re a bad boy?” Will’s eyebrow raised.

“A bad man,” Nigel winked. “A very bad man.”

“I’m not sure if I believe that,” Will said. “You’re good to me,” he scooted closer to Nigel until his side was resting in the crook of his Nigel’s arm.

Nigel’s heart was pounding hard against his rib cage, he held his breath hoping Will wouldn’t be able to feel it. How embarrassing.

“God, you drive me fucking crazy,” Nigel breathed out, not intending to speak the words out loud or for Will to hear him.

“And yet you don’t want to fuck me today,” Will reached his fingers into his Diet Coke and flicked the moisture at Nigel in a teasing way.

Nigel shook his head, staring straight at Will’s mouth. How badly he wanted to claim those lips. Such was constantly on his mind, wondering how it would feel for their mouths to join, their tongues to roll together, breathing each other’s air.

_ Fuck. _

“How um…” Nigel needed to change the subject before he lost all self-control and carried Will back to the bedroom bridal style. “How did you come to work here? What did you do before?”

“Art school,” Will said, he hated thinking back to that time, back to Matthew and what he did. Back to the days of poverty and worry. “Nothing exciting really. Hannibal bought a few of my paintings at auction, the rest of history. He recruited me and I came here instead. I dropped out. I don’t like talking about it…”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Will said, placing his hand on Nigel’s thigh. “It’s nothing traumatic or depressing. I chose to come here, I called him.”

“You seem happy here,” Nigel said, feigning being excited for the boy. But he got sick thinking about how many men Will saw weekly, knowing his heart was owned by Hannibal. He couldn’t be truly jubilant when his jealously was seething. Ripping and tearing through his every atom.

“I am,” Will said nodding. “I really am.”

Nigel wanted to tell Will he could make him happy too, he could whisk him away and give him everything Hannibal could and more but he kept that to himself. Nigel was never the relationship type, always a fuck ‘em and leave ‘em kind of man, one night stands were his forte, but with Will, he wanted that boy not just in his life but in his future.

“Some fun, and funny, shit happens here. Some appointments are wild.”

“Did you do anything interesting these past couple of weeks?” Nigel took a swig of drink. He braced himself to be jealous but he was genuinely curious what other men asked from Will.

“Yeah actually,” Will laughed. “Me and one of the other boys shared a client, he wanted two boys,” he gestured flippantly. “It happens quite often…but, yeah, he paid us ten thousand dollars…each…just to spank each other’s asses with our feet and then kiss each other’s feet while…he did his own thing. The strangest client I’ve ever had, but we all have our fetishes I suppose,” he chuckled.

Nigel’s jaw was dropped open. “That’s…interesting.” He laughed and Will joined in.

They talked for the next thirty minutes about anything and everything they could think of, from favorite movies and songs to Will’s favorite art styles.

“Will you ever draw something for me?” Nigel said. “I’d love to own an original from you. I can pay you?”

“Like you haven’t already paid enough? No,” Will smiled. “Sure, I can whip something up for you by your next appointment. Anything you want specifically?”

Nigel shrugged. “Surprise me.”

“Deal.”

Their eye contact lingered for a moment. Nigel had bad news he needed to break, but he wasn’t sure how. He checked his watch and confirmed they had less than ten minutes left, he took a breath and began speaking. “You’ll have a while to work on that drawing. I won’t be able to make it in for a while. I have some things to attend to out of state.”

Will’s face fell. “How long?”

“A month. Maybe two.” Nigel hated thinking about not seeing the boy for so long, but his job was a demanding one. He wouldn’t be able to make it back to Louisiana until everything he was traveling for died down.

Will’s stomach did cartwheels down to his gut. He hated to admit it to himself but he would miss the man terribly. Client or not, he was someone Will felt truly comfortable around. He chose not to address it, afraid he would say the wrong thing.

“Have we talked enough?” Will said. “Can we go back to the bedroom now? Have a little quickie?” He stroked Nigel’s thigh, squeezing and pulsing his hand. He would miss the man’s hands on him.

Nigel bit down on his lower lip, he wanted so badly to feel Will’s hole around his cock, knowing he wouldn’t be able to have it for so long. In the end, he shook his head. “Afraid I wouldn’t be able to let you go,” he stroked Will’s face with the back of his hand. “Fucking gorgeous,” he spoke out loud to himself. “Impossibly.”

Will’s eyes flickered down to Nigel’s lips and back up. Something was going on inside that boy’s mind, Nigel could tell, but he wouldn’t push him.

“Just don’t forget me,” Will said leaning back a bit. “Is that a deal?”

Nigel pulled out his phone flashing his background. “Could I ever?”

Will took the phone from Nigel before he could slide it back into his pocket and opened up the camera application. He held the phone up and took a selfie of himself smiling holding up his empty cup of ice with a wink. “There,” Will handed the phone back to Nigel. “Just in case anyone asks what my face looks like.”

Nigel smiled looking at the photo and back at Will. “You’re cute. But I’m keeping the same phone background.”

“I would expect nothing less of you,” Will said with a laugh. “Pervert.”

They looked into each other’s eyes again when a big bald security guard entered the room informing Nigel that his hour was up. They must have still been under video surveillance.

“You’re sure you don’t want to buy another hour?” Will said, squeezing Nigel’s leg again not letting him get up to go anywhere. “I’m free for the rest of the afternoon.”

“I want to,” Nigel spoke low enough so the security guard wouldn’t hear him, an airy groan to his voice. “But I have to drive up to Michigan before tomorrow morning. I’ll see you, okay? Take care.” He got up to leave and Will watched him go, escorted out by the security guard. As soon as Nigel was out of sight, Will started missing him.

* * *

Will didn’t have any more appointments or responsibilities for the day and with Nigel and a drawing for the man on his mind he got up to go back to his solo bedroom to get a headstart on it, curious where his subconscious would take him once pencil met paper.

His mind reeled with the man’s kindness, his touches, Nigel’s way of making him feel perfectly comfortable. He had enjoyed the man’s company since their first tryst, but this little meeting had put Will’s opinion of the man even higher.

He began his trek toward his room, smiling to himself when he heard his boyfriend’s voice behind him.

“What was all that?”

Will stopped in his tracks and turned. “Hey, baby,” he smiled a little hop to his step, excited to see his love, but he couldn’t deny the sudden underlying feeling of guilt under Hannibal’s stare. “I thought you were out meeting recruitments?” He wrapped his arms around Hannibal’s body and looked up at him, stroking his back. “How did it go?”

Hannibal’s face was stern, unamused. He gestured with his chin to the open room Will had just walked from. Where he had been sat with Nigel.

“What was that?”

“Client appointment,” Will shook his head. “Nothing, really.”

“Why were you not in your bedroom?”

“He didn’t feel like doing anything sexual today,” Will said, thinking that would be enough to finish the discussion, but when Hannibal’s face didn’t budge he realized it wasn’t. “It’s not a big deal, babe.”

“Did he pay?”

Will sighed closing his eyes. “Of course he paid.”

“Then why were you not giving him his money’s worth?”

Will was taken aback. “He just wanted to talk…”

“I can’t have people come in here getting to know you. They pay to fuck you. To use your body. Not become your friend. They’ll think they know you, that way, and think they stand a chance. They develop designs on you. Think you’re going to run away with them. It’s dangerous, for you and this business.” 

“They know I’m with you,” Will said, clutching at the back of Hannibal’s suit. “I remind them of that every possible moment. I…”

“I don’t want him coming back here,” Hannibal said. “Ever.”

“What? No…” Will shook his head. “He’s a nice guy. He didn’t mean any harm.”

“He’s banned, henceforth,” Hannibal said. “I’m going to tell Frederick if he shows up here again to call the authorities.”

“I’m sorry,” Will’s voice came out at a squeak. “I didn’t know it would upset you. I was just talking…” Tears began brimming in Will’s eyes. He had hurt his love, he had done wrong, he would do anything to make up for it. Hannibal had never looked at him that way, with such anger.

Will cowered under his stare, reminded of his father, belligerent, mean, and irrational. Will would do anything to soften the features on Hannibal’s face, have him look at him the way he was used to. This was all wrong. Nigel was his friend, sure, but he would do without him if he had to, to keep he and Hannibal’s relationship strong. Hannibal was Will’s everything.

“That’s how it starts,” Hannibal said. “You know I don’t consider fucking as cheating, but this…this has to stop.”

“I didn’t cheat on you,” Will shook his head, tears falling from his eyes to cascade down his cheeks from the movement. “I would never…”

“What are you wearing?”

Will looked down at himself. Hannibal hadn’t been expected to be back home until the evening, he didn’t think it would be a huge deal to wear something a little more boyish.

“It’s more of a masculine day for me, so…” Will shrugged. “I wanted to be comfortable.”

He had been with Hannibal for just over a year, and Hannibal had seen him present as both sides of his gender-fluidity multiple times. He knew the ropes. And while he and Hannibal rarely discussed it all, it had never been an issue until that moment.

“Not around the clients,” Hannibal said matter-of-factly, as if making a new rule. “They don’t want to see that,” he gathered Will’s chin in his grasp. “You’re my shining star. My pretty boy. We don’t want to break that fantasy for anyone, do we?”

“I’m sorry,” Will said. “I should’ve asked if it was okay or not.” He rested his head against Hannibal’s chest and held him close, a tear streamed down his eye to the tip of his nose to drip off against his love’s perfectly tailored suit. “Please forgive me?” Will’s guilt was overwhelming, he hadn’t realized what he did was wrong, he was merely going with the flow. He couldn’t lose Hannibal, couldn’t lose his love, the roof over his head, his job that earned him thousands a day. Without it all, he would be so lost, destitute.

Hannibal pet Will’s hair. “I forgive you,” he said. “I know you enjoyed that client but we have to nip that in the bud. Don’t you agree?”

Will nodded, his face moving against Hannibal’s suit dampening the fabric with his tears. “Yes, Sir.”

* * *

Will spent the following week making it up to Hannibal, doing exactly as he had been instructed. He had never disappointed Hannibal before and was terrified of the consequences if he chose to continue to defy him.

Things were more or less back to normal by the end of that time, life continued at the brothel, Will continued flaunting his stuff, making money while Hannibal watched, either physically or via the cameras. Will fell back into it, loving his job, loving making Hannibal happy.

The last day of the week was when it all changed.

Will had come home early from an outing with a few of the other boys. Hannibal had sent them out to scout at local gay bars alone for hopefuls, a monthly activity.

Will was given the position of leader as always, the other boys served as his backup. Together they had secured six numbers and pictures of boys for Hannibal’s approval. Will was excited to show Hannibal how well they had done, but by the time Will got home, he was exhausted.

It was past midnight and all he wanted was to get into bed, crawl under the comforter and slide against Hannibal’s body. Kiss his lips in his sleep and tell him how much he loved him before drifting into unconsciousness.

Will turned the last corner toward he and Hannibal’s shared bedroom and his stomach immediately plummeted to his feet. Hannibal had one of the working boys pressed against the hallway wall, cupping the boy through his pants, and kissing his lips. Their mouths moved together, and Will’s gaze dropped, sick to his stomach. He couldn’t bring himself to look up.

He froze.

Only he was allowed to kiss Hannibal’s lips. Only him. That was their rule. Anything and everything else was free game, but not kissing. Never kissing. That was reserved for them and then only, it was sacred.

It took only a moment for Hannibal to lean back and realize Will was standing there. His eyes widened but he made no move to placate the boy, continuing to rub the other boy through his pants. The lithe boy’s hand was in Hannibal’s hair, his mouth open in ecstasy. 

“Hey, baby,” Hannibal said. “You’re home early.”

Will felt nauseous. Like he could vomit right there in the hallway.

“What are you doing?” His voice was small, coming out as a squeak there at the end. “Why are you kissing him?”

He didn’t look at the boy but kept his gaze on Hannibal. He was angry, he was upset, disgusted, frustrated, his body vibrated, tears close to spilling from his eyes.

“He kisses all of us, you fucking idiot,” the boy said with a lackadaisical laugh.

Will looked back and forth between the boy and Hannibal. “Is that true?”

Kissing was the one activity he and Hannibal did only together, or so he had thought for over a year. It helped Will feel secure, knowing he was the only one who got to enjoy that level of intimacy with Hannibal. But it was all just a farce. Or was it? 

“Honey…” Hannibal said, before Will held up his hand to silence him, walking toward the other end of the brothel, somewhere he could be alone. He wanted to leave, run out of the front door and never return. Hannibal had broken their promise, he didn’t want to look at him, couldn’t bear to. If he were to leave, where would he go? Where had Hannibal been keeping his money for the past year? In a savings account, he knew that much. Knew he didn’t need it at the time, not when Hannibal bought him everything. Will could ask for that money and leave, just leave and start a new life.

He found one of the empty bedrooms and collapsed onto the bed to cry, his body wracking with sobs, tugging a pillow longways to hold, pressing his wet face against the fabric, weeping until he passed out.

Will woke up the next morning, his eyes swollen with tears. The first thing Will realized was that Hannibal hadn’t followed him, hadn’t come looking for him. He felt numb. Like someone had placed his glass heart in a velvet drawstring pouch and stomped on it until the glass was sand once more. Had it all been a lie? Had he and Hannibal never had something unique?

He needed to take his mind off it all. He sat up and saw the old piano in the corner. He got up with a wince, feeling emotionally and physically like he had been hit by a train. But he made it to the wooden bench without too much fuss. He remembered a couple of weeks after he arrived at the brothel, how Hannibal had taught him a few chords, how to hold his hands over the keys. Will shook his head trying to rid that memory from his mind as he placed his fingers down and began playing, slow and unsure. It didn’t sound good, and it was choppy, but the melody took Will’s mind far away for a brief moment. To a week ago when everything had been perfect.

He didn’t realize when the door opened behind him and Hannibal stepped inside until he was placing his hands on Will’s shoulders, petting him gently over his shirt. Will tensed up, shrugging the man’s hands off his shoulders. However, Hannibal didn’t take that as a signal to stop, moving to sit on the bench behind Will, his legs on either side of the boy’s as he wrapped his arms around him from behind, nuzzling his face in Will’s neck.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed. “It only just started. It will never happen again.”

Will melted under Hannibal’s touch, leaning back against him Wanting so badly to forgive him and tell him it was okay.

“Was it my fault? For what I did the other day?”

Hannibal shook his head. “No, I had kissed the boys a couple of times before that. I didn’t realize it was so important to you. I’ll stop.” Hannibal gently caressed Will’s sides. “I love you.”

Will’s eyes closed and his face contorted, as tears streamed down his cheeks. Hannibal had never said the words before. Every time Will expressed his feelings Hannibal merely said he agreed or darted around it. He had never said the actual words, until then.

Will’s heart yearned for the man. He turned to look into Hannibal’s eyes, Will could see the remorse there. He placed his hand on his man’s cheek and kissed his lips chastely before resting their foreheads together, stroking the back of Hannibal’s hair.

“I love you so much,” Will sighed. “I don’t want to lose you. Or be replaced. I was so scared.”

“I couldn’t replace you,” Hannibal said, squeezed Will’s body back against his own.

At the moment, Will knew what he wanted. Above everything else.

“If I quit, will you?” His voice faltering on the last syllable.

Hannibal looked confused. “Quit what?”

“I just want it to be us, just me and you. We can stay here, things can continue as normal. I’ll stop seeing clients altogether. You stop sleeping with the other boys. Just us. I just want it to be us. Please?” He started crying again. It was all Will ever truly wanted. Since the beginning.

Hannibal considered the proposition for a moment before shaking his head. “No. That doesn’t interest me.”

“Please?” Will said, clutching at Hannibal’s neck and smoothing his hair. “Please can we just try?”

Hannibal shook his head again. “It wouldn’t last.”

“Am I not enough?” Will’s cheeks were wet again.

“You are,” Hannibal said. “But…”

“But?”

“That’s not how I’m wired. You know that. This is my business,” he chuckled. “Quality control.”

Will nodded. “You’re right. You’re right, I’m sorry.” He knew he was being unreasonable. Hannibal had stated time and time again that monogamy wasn’t something he would ever be into.

“And you have your clients that count on you,” Hannibal pet Will’s sides. “Hmm?”

Will nodded. He couldn’t let them down.

Hannibal checked his watch. “I have to go. Ethan is leaving for the month and I promised him…I’ll be back, okay?” Will nodded and Hannibal kissed Will’s cheek.

Hannibal got up and everything inside Will was screaming for him to grab his hand and beg him not to go. But he couldn’t. If he wanted to keep Hannibal in his life he had to play by the man’s rules.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry, I made myself cry writing this chapter.


	7. Chapter 7

Michigan was painfully boring compared to Louisiana. Louisiana had personality, it had style, it had culture, it had Will. Nigel was in the state for two days when he realized he hated it there. It was cold and bleak and boring, and he had grown up in fucking Romania.

He had been tempted, multiple times, especially after a few drinks to email Will and ask how he was and what he had been up to. Nigel had the overwhelming urge some days to send him one of the photos he had taken of the mountain view outside his hotel room that reminded himself of Will’s drawing, but he refrained. _ Surely, it wouldn’t be appropriate. _The email was an update and business email for Will’s clients, not a personal line, and he didn’t want to come off as desperate, despite being positive he already had. All the balls were in Will’s court for contact, which was highly unlikely anyway.

He let it go.

_ Maybe the next couple of months will rid the boy from my mind. _Nigel found his thoughts of Will dipping into an unhealthy territory in Louisiana, knowing full well the boy was happy where he was and was in a happy and committed relationship. Maybe the relocation was a good thing, a blessing in disguise, a way of weening himself off the boy, which was the best thing he could do for himself and the situation.

But such didn’t stop Nigel from finding people who reminded him of Will in looks and personality and taking them back to his hotel room to fuck. Women, men, anyone with long dark curls were on his radar. He kissed them, something he could never do with Will, imagining with his eyes closed it was the young Louisiana man, the one that haunted his every fantasy. After every fuck came the feeling of regret, of deep woeful longing, because nobody could ever measure up to the boy, no matter how hard Nigel tried to forget him, he couldn’t.

On one particular evening, Nigel brought a woman back to his room, closing his eyes as she slowly rode him. He had requested she keep her skirt on, just as Will had during their last sexual session. He tugged softly on the material as the woman undulated on top of him, taking himself back to that moment in time. He came hard, biting his tongue to keep from shouting the boy’s name. Afterward, the woman left and Nigel had a smoke, laying on his back in the bed staring at the ceiling wishing he had a fucking time machine.

He didn’t sleep with Will during their last meeting, and he frequently found himself wishing he had purchased another hour, fucked him one last time before he left for a couple of months. He wanted to. Fuck, he had wanted to badly. But he was feeling self-righteous that day, thinking he could overcome his addiction to the boy if he had denied himself. He didn’t want to stop seeing Will, that wasn’t his goal, but if for some reason his job in Louisiana fell through and he never got to go back, he would have fewer memories to look back on, less of a reason to hold on to hope.

He had thought he could easily get over the boy. How ignorant he was. He had only fucked Will twice, only seen him a combined total of three hours, and yet the boy had buried into him, tattooed his name on every one of his blood vessels, every vein. He couldn’t shake him, as hard as he tried. But he knew he wasn’t the only one who felt that way. He was one of the dozens of regulars, one of the hundreds of meetings, there was nothing special about him. If for some reason Nigel never made it back to Louisiana, he wished the boy the best future this shitty world could grant him. _ Hannibal better be treating him well. _

Nigel finished his cigarette and immediately lit another one, getting up from the hotel bed to walk out onto the balcony of his room. It was past midnight and nearly pitch dark outside except for a few city lights illuminating the mountains in the distance. He was naked, not caring much to cover himself up, being on the twentieth floor. He plopped himself down into the patio chair and flung his feet up onto the railing to lounge back, taking a deep drag of his cigarette, the end burning orange in the darkness. He exhaled the smoke out, scratching his stubbled chin with his thumb, staring off imagining Will by his side, his hand in his looking out at view with him.

He had brought his phone onto the balcony with him in case an important call came through. His job constantly had him on his toes. He tried denying himself but eventually caved and opened his phone to stare down at the silly selfie Will had taken for him during their last meeting, two weeks prior. He smiled to himself, the corner of his lip twitching. He didn’t care where his job sent him next, he would take the time to see him again, fly from anywhere, just to pay for some more of that beautiful boy’s time.

* * *

Things for Will at the brothel went back to normal fairly quickly, given he and Hannibal’s little hiccup. Hannibal had put more effort into placating and spoiling his boy, spending more time with him, taking him on more outings, flaunting him around town more often, kissing him harder and with more passion. Will felt cherished but continued using his appointments and art as a distraction to what Hannibal was doing when they were apart. But it was nothing he wasn’t used to by then.

“I’d die if I lost you,” Hannibal told Will in the back of their limo on the ride back home to the brothel after an evening out. Will’s pants were down as he was cradled in Hannibal’s arms, two of his fingers deep inside Will sliding in and out as he kissed the boy’s neck, whispering.

“Tight little body, so pretty and all mine. All fucking mine. My little moneymaker, hmm? This pussy has everyone spending thousands for just a taste. But it’s all mine. All Daddy’s?”

Will clutched Hannibal’s suit and whimpered, nodding. “All yours, Daddy.” His lips shined with gloss in the darkness.

“You’re an angel among men, my darling. None of them deserve you.”

Will shook his head, drunk off Hannibal’s words. How disgustingly in love with the man he was. “Only you, Daddy. Only you.”

Will cried as he came into the front panel of his black satin panties still covering him, kissing Hannibal’s lips and tugging on the fabric of his love’s jacket. When things were like this and Will was Hannibal’s only focus, life was perfect.

But when they were apart, Will was miserable. Overthinking, paranoid, scared that the next boy, the next new hire, would catch Hannibal’s attention more than he could. Will hadn’t been scared of such a thing until he discovered Hannibal had been kissing the other boys behind his back. Their trust wasn’t completely broken but it had diminished quite a bit. He didn’t feel as secure as he used to. And it was tearing him apart bit by bit. Hannibal had told Will he wouldn’t do that anymore, and Will wanted to trust him with every fiber of himself but such was difficult when so many people in his life had broken promises.

Will had abandonment issues, a lot of them. Stemming from when he was a very young child, his mother leaving without a word, his father drinking himself into a stupor nearly every night and then dying, having chosen to drive that way, leaving him alone the day before his high school graduation, to Matthew doing what he did. He was petrified Hannibal would do the same thing, now constantly on guard and worried, making sure to do anything and everything to please his man so he wouldn’t be kicked out to fend for himself, alone in the world again.

Will sat on his and Hannibal’s shared bed sketching while Hannibal was in the shower. He looked up at the walls proudly displaying his artwork, including the pieces Hannibal had bought the night they had met. _ He’s proud of me. _ Will brimmed with love every time Hannibal framed and hung up a new piece of his in the bedroom or the halls. His father had never cared for his art, always calling it _ too weird _ , or _ fruity _. Will had planned on applying to the police academy when he graduated, hoping to make his father proud by becoming a cop like him, but when he died Will decided to follow his dream and go to art school instead. It was the first time he had done something for himself. Which he was grateful he had had the heart to do, or he wouldn’t have met Hannibal. Wouldn’t have been swept up in this whirlwind of a complicated romance.

“What are you drawing?” Hannibal said coming out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist as he dried his hair with another fluffy white towel, flecks of water flicking his bare shoulders from the quick movement.

Will’s heart melted seeing Hannibal so stripped down, soft and vulnerable straight out of the shower. It was so domestic. Something for them and them only. He flipped his drawing pad over onto the comforter. “Nothing,” he said. “Come here,” he reached out for his love with one hand. Hannibal crawled onto the bed and they laid down together, their foreheads joining and their fingers lacing.

“I’m gonna miss you,” Will whispered.

“Mm, I’ll miss you too, darling,” he kissed his lips, chaste.

Hannibal was going out of town for a couple of days. Will hadn’t asked to come with him and Hannibal hadn’t offered so he wouldn’t push it, not wanting to come off clingy.

“Where are you going again?”

“To meet with an old friend,” Hannibal kissed his forehead, his thumb petting the skin there, after his lips left it.

Will nodded. “Why can’t they come here?”

“It’s for a private event out of state,” Hannibal read Will’s expression. “You’d find it quite boring, I’m sure.”

“Too sophisticated for a little whore like me? Hm, I get it,” Will shrugged, a sly smirk on his face, feigning upset.

“Quite the contrary,” Hannibal laughed, tugging Will closer. “You’re too sophisticated for _ it _.”

“Now I know you’re full of shit.”

Hannibal lay a playful hard smack against Will’s thigh.

“Watch that little mouth before I wash it out with soap.”

Will’s eyebrows raised. “Oh? Is that a promise?”

“Kinky little thing,” Hannibal laughed, petting Will’s face. “Those Daddy issues are rooted in there deep, hm? My gain I suppose.”

“Yeah, my trauma is your gain,” Will said. “Asshole.”

They laughed together, nuzzling and kissing for a bit before Hannibal was tugging his towel off.

“You’re going to miss your flight,” Will said, his voice breathy.

“It’s my plane, it’s not going anywhere without me.”

“You have your own jet? How do I not know about this?” Will tried to back up, stunned by this completely new information.

“There’s much you don’t know about me, still, sweetheart.”

“Mm, yeah that’s what scares me,” Will said before Hannibal pressed him against the bed and got on top of him, kissing his lips and shutting him right up.

* * *

  
“Come out with me,” Randall said, plopping himself into the booth next to Will.

“Where are you going?” Will said, nudging his glasses further up the bridge of his nose in between pencil strokes, focused down on his drawing.

“Club downtown,” Randall said. “Same one we did the recruiting last month. I just want to fucking dance. Maybe get some food. Come with me.” He moved closer, putting his arm around Will’s shoulder. “It’ll take your mind off of everything.”

Randall knew that Will had a lot on his mind. He didn’t know the details but he could sense it, polite enough not to pry. Randall was the only other working boy Will got along with in the slightest. They didn’t know much about one another personally, but on the surface, they got along very well. He was much more reserved than Matthew, given what he did for a living, less of a goofball and more of a scholar. Will enjoyed spending time with him, trading stories about clients and just hanging out and being carefree, around someone his own age, when he could.

Hannibal had taken two of the boys to the back bedroom and Will had tried to distract himself with some art but his handshaking was hindering him from doing so.

“Yeah,” Will nodded looking up. “Yeah. I’d like that. I should probably change first though,” he looked down at himself. He was wearing one of Hannibal’s grey t-shirts that was big on him and a pair of tight black shorts.

“Why? You look great,” Randall smiled. “You always look great.”

Randall and Will had always been just friends, and were, still, but since they had shared a client a few weeks earlier Randall had started looking at Will with softer eyes. It was blatantly obvious, but Will never brought it up, hoping it would pass. He didn’t want to ruin his one platonic relationship with complications of one-sided feelings.

Will knocked on he and Hannibal’s shared bedroom door and informed his love he was going out with Randall to the club. Hannibal, busy inside with two boys, told Will to be home by midnight, a grunt ending his words.

He went to his client bedroom where he kept his art supplies and clothing and changed into a casual pair of jean shorts that stopped right above the knee, a black tank top, and black and white sneakers. He put his long hair in a ponytail and joined Randall out in the parking lot in his car.

Randall was the only boy working at the brothel who owned a vehicle. All the others took Ubers to the lake a mile down the road and walked the rest of the way. Desert Rose was a well-kept secret so through-traffic was strictly prohibited. Randall worked at the brothel only one weekend a month but visited quite often to see Will and for the nightly afterparties, but he was mostly focused on his college work, choosing that over fun the majority of the time.

“Hey,” Will said plopping himself down in the passenger's seat of the already running car and doing up his seatbelt. “Oh God, I’m starving. The place serves wings right?”

“Oh yeah,” Randall said with a wink, shifting gears and they were on their way. “Can’t wait to get me some of that bleu cheese goodness.”

“You’re disgusting,” Will made a face. “Bleu cheese is rancid.”

“You guzzle come and you have the audacity to say bleu cheese is gross?” Randall laughed speeding down the country road toward the highway.

“I don’t…guzzle it.” Will sulked.

The club was a small hole in the wall gay bar in downtown New Orleans and it was where half of Desert Rose’s staff had been recruited. Everyone knew Will’s face there, knowing him as the guy with the golden ticket toward making serious money. Everyone was a schmoozer, trying to catch Will’s eye every time he walked into the club which was seriously annoying but he had learned to ignore it.

Multiple times in the past boys would approach Will, trying to get a job at the infamous Desert Rose and Will would tell them there wasn’t a chance since they approached him, to spread the word that if anyone _ asks _ to come to Desert Rose that person will never be recruited. That stopped random people from approaching Will and bothering him on his nights out, however it didn’t stop every twink and otter from trying to impress Will and annoyingly try to catch his gaze. Will tuned it out to the best of his ability.

They found a high top table and made themselves comfortable, ordering themselves some wings, Will a Diet Coke and Randall a Pina Colada with an extra shot. The music was loud and the main lights were out, rainbow colors bounced off the walls from moving searchlights, boys danced in cages with dollar bills in their speedo styled underwear. This was the life.

“Ugh fuck so good,” Will groaned around his chicken wing.

“You’re treating that thing like a cock,” Randall chuckled, taking a bite from his own wing from the pile.

“It’s…” Will swallowed and wiped his mouth of buffalo sauce. “…almost as good.”

Will and Randall got to chatting as they ate, making jokes and telling funny stories about their latest clients. 

Will gasped. “He did not.”

Randall nodded with a laugh, already on his second drink. He would make sure to sober up before the drive back to the brothel. Dancing would help a lot. “He did. He said he would pay a grand extra.” He shrugged, taking a bite of his wing. A you-gotta-do-what-you-have-to-do sometimes gesture.

“At least you both were in the shower. Imagine that all over the sheets.”

“Leo would have kicked my ass,” Randall said. “I told the guy, shower or nowhere.”

Leo was one of Desert Rose’s employees, he cleaned the place, did all the laundry. Hannibal paid him five grand a month and he never had to touch another person.

“I wouldn’t have done it.”

“No?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Hannibal isn’t into that?”

“God I hope not,” Will said, picking his teeth clean with a napkin.

“It’s not so bad if the guy is well hydrated. Looks like water.”

“Stop,” Will whined.

They both laughed and the music filled the silence between them for a while. Will looked out at the dance floor and around the club, but could see Randall staring at him from his peripheral vision, his eyes studying Will’s beautiful features.

“You know everyone is jealous of you, right?”

“Me?” Will’s brow furrowed.

“Duh, you’re gorgeous and you have all of Daddy’s affections.”

Will hated when fellow boys referred to Hannibal as a collective ‘Daddy’, wincing at the term from his friend’s mouth.

“But don’t worry, we all know Hannibal is head over heels for you. You know he kicked one of the boys out last week for calling you ugly? Told him to never come back.”

Will’s jaw dropped. “Shut up, no he didn’t. Who?”

Will didn’t fraternize with the other boys, didn’t know a lot of the house secrets. He liked staying out of the drama.

“Kevin.”

“Oh, now Kevin had no business calling anyone ugly.”

They laughed together. The server came and collected their plates of bones. Both boys had picked their piles clean.

“Thank you,” Will nodded to the server. Randall handed the guy the money to pay their tab plus a one hundred dollar tip. Will never carried money on him, never needed it. He rarely went out with colleagues, he was always with Hannibal who always covered everything. All the money he had earned at Desert Rose was in a bank account, he had never touched a penny.

“You’ve got to let me pay you back one day,” Will said. “You pay every time.” Every time Randall paid for him he was reminded of Matthew, his old roommate, and best friend, he always paid for everything because Will was broke. Such wasn’t the case now, he could afford a hundred semesters of art school with his savings if he desired. He felt guilty, reminding himself every time to get a debit card so he could use his own money when he was out.

“Don’t worry about it, seriously. Your company is worth the money.”

Will smiled, close-mouthed and meek. Randall was a really good friend.

“I can’t believe Hannibal’s last main just got married,” Randall took a sip of his drink. “I heard he was the biggest whore the brothel had ever known.” He chuckled.

Will sat frozen._ His last main? _ It had never occurred to Will that there were mains before himself. Sure Hannibal mentioned them when he first moved in but Will had assumed he meant last boyfriend or last major fling, not a last main at the brothel. The sinking paranoia of being replaced was sneaking up on him once more.

“What?”

“Oh, you didn’t know? Yeah, that’s where Daddy went last week. Flew to Bermuda. Went to the wedding. Apparently, he paid for the whole thing as a gift. Crazy, huh? Do you think he’ll pay for my wedding? Eh, who am I kidding I’ll never get married, being a slut is just too much fun.” He lifted his arms above his head swaying to the music pounding the club. He was itching to get up and dance.

Will was frequently left out on things, but he never thought Hannibal would fly to attend a wedding without him. Without telling him a word. Why was he not invited? Did he and his old main hook up? The green monkey on Will’s back was tightening his palm against his throat, pressing down hard.

“How do you know all of this?”

“Through the grapevine, words spread like wildfire there. The group chat is constantly busy.”

Will was aware of the group chat all the other boys had, he wasn’t interested. It made him sick to think about all the things the boys must’ve said about his man in the chat.

How had every boy known about Hannibal flying out of the country to visit his old main and Hannibal hadn’t told him a single word about it. _ Maybe because he knows how jealous I get? It’s not that serious, _ he told himself. _ He did tell me he was flying to meet with an old friend. But he also said it would be boring. Why would he not bring me with him to a wedding? Who shows up to a wedding without a date? He must’ve found it awkward to bring his current main to his old main’s wedding, that’s understandable. It’s fine. It’s not a big deal, calm down. _

“Let’s go dance.” Will got up, grabbing Randall’s hand and wheeling him to the dance floor to get his mind off the subject.

They danced for hours, grinding against each other and other men. Nobody tried to kiss Will, nobody ever dared, knowing he belonged to Hannibal, to the brothel. Desert Rose was a well-kept secret between a very small portion of the gay community in New Orleans, those that knew about it knew to keep quiet. Hannibal never accompanied Will to the club, he drew too much attention, and if people were falling over themselves to impress Will, they would lose their minds if they saw Hannibal.

Dancing was a nice release from stress and worry, the music pounded through the club stamping out all of Will’s worried thoughts for a short while, leaving his body humming long after they got back in the car to drive back.

* * *

“We have to do this more often, seriously,” Randall said, they were driving down the dirt road in the dark toward the water.

Will nodded, his hair matted with sweat in his ponytail. “Definitely. It’s nice to be reminded there’s a world outside of all this,” he gestured to the brothel as soon as they cleared the trees and it came into view.

Randall parked his car and put his hand over Will’s. “If you ever need to get out for a night, let me know. I’ll drive over here and pick you up if it isn’t one of my weekends.”

Will smiled. “Thanks, man.”

Once Will was back inside he had decided not to bring up Bermuda and the wedding. He didn’t want to know any of the details. Ignorance was bliss.

Two days later Will and Hannibal had another man in their bed, one of the brothel’s newest hires, invited in by Hannibal, agreed upon by Will. Sometimes, rarely, but sometimes, Will was in the mood for threesomes.

Threesomes with Hannibal and another boy were great and justifying for the sole fact that Hannibal always paid more attention to Will, both of them using the outside boy as more of a sex toy, an aide in their own sex life. The outside boy, whoever he was, wasn’t equal to Will and it made him feel secure in his position in Hannibal’s life.

Hannibal was kneeling behind Will, his arms wrapped around with his palms on Will’s lower stomach caressing and petting the soft skin there as Will fucked into the boy bent over in front of him gripping the pillow.

“Fuck him, baby,” Hannibal cooed into Will’s ear. “That’s it.” He kissed his neck.

Will turned to join he and Hannibal’s lips, rolling their tongues into each other’s mouths as Will fucked the whining boy in front of him. “Stretch him open for me,” Hannibal whispered against Will’s trembling lips. Will nodded, nuzzling against Hannibal’s neck. Minutes ago he and the boy had both been laying at Hannibal’s sides taking turns sucking his cock. Hannibal had only spoken to Will, only ran his fingers through Will’s hair. The other boy was nothing, just another couple of holes. Will was drunk off of it.

“I’m close,” Will sighed.

Hannibal curled his fingers gently against Will’s stomach. “Come inside him,” he cooed. “You can do it.”

Will gripped the boy’s hips and closed his eyes rocking forward and coming into the condom as Hannibal held him steady from behind. “That’s it,” he sighed and praised Will through his orgasm, rubbing up and down his hairless thighs. “Good boy, now move aside and let Daddy fuck him, hmm?”

Will kissed Hannibal’s lips one last time and fell to the side curling up against a pillow, ridding himself of his condom and tossing it away. He lay and watch with half-lidded eyes as Hannibal put on his own condom, flipped the boy over and bent his legs, slamming into him.

The boy whined and cried, clutching at Hannibal’s arms and chest as he rocked back and forth from the movement. Will didn’t look at the boy at all but kept his attention on Hannibal. His face and his body. Fuck was he lucky. That was his man, his beautiful, gorgeous, rich, powerful man. He loved him so god damn much.

Soon the boy was tugging at himself and coming all over his chest and Hannibal into the condom, making eye contact with Will while doing so. Will reached his hand out to lay his palm across Hannibal’s hand as his orgasm rocked him.

Hannibal leaned to kiss Will’s lips, and Will felt Hannibal’s head being pulled away from him, not on its own. The boy had pulled Hannibal away and made him face him.

“Kiss me, Daddy. Please?”

Hannibal looked at the boy considering him and back at Will.

“Can I kiss him, baby?”

Will froze, feeling put on the spot. The boy’s hand was in Hannibal’s hair, rubbing his scalp. His stupid face drawn in ecstasy. He was new, he must not know the rules. But why was Hannibal asking? At least he _ was _ asking. “I don’t…” he saw Hannibal’s face. If he denied him would he be angry? He looked genuine. He was asking permission. But why would he want to kiss another boy? Maybe kissing meant less to Hannibal. To Will, kissing was love. To Hannibal, it was more casual. He reminded himself he had Hannibal’s heart. But he did time and time again and it never helped. “Yeah, that’s fine.” He nodded.

Hannibal turned to their boy without hesitation and joined their lips, starting slow make out. Will forced himself to watch for a moment, was this the new normal? Would he have to get over this?

He excused himself to the bathroom with tears in his eyes.

He hovered over the sink, gripping the black porcelain for a few moments until Hannibal joined him for their typical post-tryst shower.

“Are you okay?” Hannibal could tell something was wrong as he got out the towels for their washing from the linen closet.

Will turned around. “I thought you said you wouldn’t do it.”

“I asked your permission, and you gave it,” he said robotically as he unfolded their towels and placed them on the rack.

“You put me on the spot.”

“I can’t win with you,” Hannibal said raising his voice. He took a deep breath and walked closer, laying his hands on Will’s shoulders. His voice became soft and delicate. “Do you know how lucky you are?” He nudged Will’s chin forcing him to look up at him. “How many boys would kill to be in your position?”

“I know,” Will cowered with his arms crossed, his gaze down. “I know.”

“A kiss is nothing.”

_ It’s something to me. _

Will nodded. “I know.”

“That little jealousy is something we have to get over. Agreed?”

Will nodded again. “Yeah.”

* * *

In Michigan, Nigel was back in his hotel room getting ready for bed. Setting out his pajama pants against the bed as he walked around the room brushing his teeth, his hair wet from his evening shower. The television was on in the room but Nigel wasn’t paying it much attention.

He made his way back to the bathroom to wash out his mouth. On the television, a news story was breaking. Nigel couldn’t hear a word over the stream of the water from the sink.

_ A double murder was discovered in Bermuda this weekend. A young homosexual couple was found in the bed of their honeymoon suite mutilated. They had the room booked for a week, this Do Not Disturb sign on their door non-stop, which is typical for honeymooning couples, but when they missed checkout management entered and what they found were two dead male bodies without legs, arms, and missing their major internal organs. This is the most brutal murder in the history of the island. Their lives together had just started. Who could have done such a sickening crime? Authorities are on it, but pessimistic. Bermuda has a high tourist rate, it’s next to impossible to find whoever did this. Back to you in the studio. _

Nigel rinsed out his mouth and shut off the sink, immediately hearing a ping on his cell phone signaling a new email.

_ Nigel (Client ID:842568), _

_ We appreciate your patronage with Desert Rose, however, due to inappropriate actions with one of our employees we have regretfully decided that you are no longer allowed on the premises and if you attempt to break this banning you will be dealt with. _

  * _Manager, Frederick Chilton_

Nigel put his hand through the bathroom mirror.


	8. Chapter 8

Nigel’s fist was dripping with blood. The mirror in front of him was shattered, pieces falling into the sink in chunks. It was loud, the sudden crash of bony flesh against the glass. The act was cathartic, a guttural response to the sickening sudden realization that Nigel would never see Will again. Never again would he touch his soft skin, never again would he look into those beautiful sky blue eyes, never again would he hear the breathy squeaky sounds the boy made when he was close to the edge, mouth open with trembling glossy lips. Nigel was the perfect maelstrom of fury and devastation. He wanted to scream, cry, throw things, but what would that accomplish? Will never belonged to him anyway. What did any of it matter?

Had he crossed a line by being too friendly, for wanting to get to know Will apart from his body? Was he truly being penalized for not sleeping with Will during their last meeting? Had he said the wrong thing to the boy? Had he come off too intense? Too clingy? Nigel’s mind was racing, trying to figure out just what he had done that had been so bad. Was it Will’s decision, or was it Hannibal’s? Regardless, it was over now. Nigel would have to learn to move on.

He wrapped his injured hand in toilet paper, leaving the bathroom mirror in an array, pieces of glass still littering the floor and all around the porcelain sink. He dragged himself to the bed immediately reaching out for his pack of cigarettes to light up, needing desperately to calm down before he did something irrational. He had half the mind to catch a flight and show up at Desert Rose, demand to know what exactly he had done wrong. He fantasized about yanking Hannibal out into the parking lot by his stupid perfectly quaffed hair and forcing him to his knees to demand answers.

But the image of Will’s face interrupted that fantasy, the ethereal and cunning boy Nigel had come to adore. His heart sank with the full-on realization that he would never again be graced with the beautiful creature’s presence. His laugh, his adorable fucking laugh. The way his eyes sparkled after he made a smart-ass remark. Nigel stared at the ceiling as he took the first drag of his cigarette, during his exhale a tear streamed from his eye.

He quickly bat the tear away and sat up, pulling his phone to himself as he took another drag. He went into his application and found Will’s personal email, separate from the brothel one, the one the boy used to chat with his regulars and composed a simple message.

_ Will, _

_ _ _ Thank you for the good times and the many laughs. _

_ \- Nigel _

He sent it and got a message back immediately. Return to sender. He had been blocked there too.

Nigel nodded to himself feeling like he had been punched in the gut, before tossing his phone across the hotel room.

It was over.

* * *

**Two Months Later**

Will finished with his final client for the evening, showered, and sat in his recliner in the corner of the room. His robe was cinched with a toweled belt, his sketchbook was in hand as he began to draw. Leo came in to change the sheets and Will greeted him politely but didn’t look up from his artwork. He left immediately after, the only sound in the room coming from Will’s delicate pencil strokes on cream-colored paper.

Hours passed and Will hadn’t realized it until he looked up at the digital clock on the table next to the bed. It was nearly time for supper. Will put his sketchpad down and set out for the kitchen.

Desert Rose’s kitchen and dining room were huge, toward the back of the place and strictly for brothel employees only. Hannibal cooked there at least three times a week, the boys always fawning over Daddy’s food and commenting on how delectable it was. Always trying to get at and stay on Hannibal’s best side.

Will stood in the corner of the kitchen and watched Hannibal cook for a couple of minutes. His back muscles flexed in his white button-up making Will salivate. Hannibal wasn’t aware of the boy’s presence, carrying on cooking, chopping vegetables and adding them to the large pot on the stove full of a boiling concoction that smelled of beef, or was it pork? Hannibal walked to the fridge and opened it in search of more ingredients when Will decided to make his presence known. 

Will walked soundlessly up behind his man and wrapped his arms around his waist. Hannibal didn’t so much as tense up, not frightened or surprised at all by Will’s sudden company.

“Hey,” Will said softly, kissing the back of Hannibal’s neck.

Hannibal pet and stroked the top of Will’s hand on his waist as he continued looking into the fridge. “Hello, Darling. How was your day?” Hannibal found the cream and snagged it, turning around to hold Will’s face with one hand and leave a chaste kiss on Will’s forehead before detaching himself. walking back over to the stove.

Will pouted. Hannibal had never just kissed his forehead.

He followed Hannibal to the stove, running his palm over Hannibal’s broad shoulders over his shirt. He had just gotten finished with a client but he was already ready again for his man, always ready for him. “It was alright,” he shrugged. “Same old same old.” He kissed Hannibal’s shoulder over the fabric, nuzzling him.

“Baby, stop. I need to finish this.” He shrugged him off gently.

Will scowled. Hannibal had never not welcomed his touches. If he was busy he typically kissed him on the lips and told him they would do it later. He had never been shut down in that way before.

“I have a house full of hungry boys that need their strength.” He stirred the pot, looking away from Will and down into the concoction. 

Will decided to try again. There was no way Hannibal would be able to resist him. He dropped to his knees. He began nuzzling against Hannibal’s thigh. “Please, Daddy. You look so hot when you cook.” He lifted his hand and snaked it under his man’s apron, rubbing there with light pressure over Hannibal’s slacks. Will looked up with big blue pleading eyes. He pouted. “Please.”

Hannibal ran his fingers through Will’s long curls, gritting his teeth. “Naughty little thing, aren’t you?”

Will nodded slowly, his cheek against his leg. “I need it.” He sighed, rubbing his palms over Hannibal’s clothed shaft continuing to stare up. “Please?”

“How can I deny you when you beg so sweetly, my Darling?”

“You can’t,” Will laughed.

Hannibal bunched up his apron at the same time as Will started making quick work of Hannibal’s belt. He pulled them and Hannibal’s briefs down enough to release him and immediately took him in, staring up all the while, his mouth full, his eyes watering. He was stroking Hannibal with his mouth while Hannibal held his face, his hips going back and forth slowly fucking between Will’s lips.

“God, you’re so pretty, my love. Such a pretty little slut all for me. Hm?”

Will nodded minutely, leaning back to leave a wet kiss at the tip licking and laving at the pre-come gathered there. He moaned at the taste.

Hannibal yanked the boy up off his knees, setting him on top of the marble counter next to the pot. He maneuvered Will’s robe to the side and sank his finger into his boy. “Always ready for me,” Hannibal grunted. Will had prepared himself already, his hole leaking lubricant around Hannibal’s digit. Will nodded and wrapped his legs around Hannibal’s hips as his man slid in and began pounding into him.

Will tried desperately to roll his body but the angle of being on the counter was awkward, he was a prisoner to Hannibal’s snapping hips, holding him down against the freezing marble. He clutched and scratched at Hannibal’s back over his button-up and whined as Hannibal kissed his neck and panted hot breath against his skin.

“I love you. I love you,” Will cried, again and again, unexpected tears streamed down his cheeks, moving to hold the back of Hannibal’s head with one hand gripping tight against the material of his shirt with the other.

They came in unison, trembling and panting together as their mouths collided again.

It felt just like any other time Will and Hannibal had fucked, on the outside. The sex was magnificent, it always was, but Will couldn’t help but feel something was missing. Will stamped that feeling out of the way, it was all in his head, it must be all in his head. This was the man he loved.

Everything was fine.

Everything was okay.

Will leaned back and looked into Hannibal’s eyes stroking his face with his thumbs. Hannibal’s eyes were devoid of emotion. Will ignored it.

Everything was fine.

* * *

_ Wear something girly. _

That was the instruction in the email sent to Will at eleven o’clock that Friday morning from one of his regulars. Most of Will’s regulars visited weekly, this particular one visited every other day, always paying for an hour and leaving immediately after he came, which never took more than ten minutes. It was nothing Will wasn’t used to. It was easy money, but it got old sometimes. Feeling like an object was hot sometimes, especially when Hannibal was there to watch, but there were some times Will wasn’t into it. That afternoon was one of those days.

He got up with a sigh and headed over to his closet. The client would be there within the hour. He flicked through the feminine side of his closet, sliding items out of the way that didn’t match the theme the particular client enjoyed. He liked Will in pink with lace, the occasional ruffle or two. He flicked more items to the side when he landed on a piece that stopped his movements. He held the item, maneuvering it to have a full view, and stared, remembering the last time he wore the outfit. 

A plaid skirt and white top.

He saw Nigel’s face in his mind, heard his gruff voice faintly in the back of his head. His lip twitched with a smile as he stared longingly at the fabric. He hoped Nigel was doing well. Since he was banned Will hadn’t given the man a second thought. He hoped Nigel had found someone to be with that made him happy, as happy as he was with Hannibal. He deserved it. Nigel was such a kind man, so open and understanding with Will’s needs. He wished he was able to be the man’s friend. He was genuine, which was rare to find in not only the day and age but in the business he was in.

Will sat on his bed and tugged his sketchpad to him flipping to a new page and couldn’t stop his hand as it worked, driven by his sub-conscience. He sketched Nigel’s face from memory, a sideways profile portrait of him, drawing the tattoo on his neck, a few strands of his long hair covering it. When he was finished he sat and looked at it for a moment. He missed him. Though he doubted Nigel missed him too. He was nothing but a whore. A fling. What he wouldn’t give to be able to talk to the man again. He could use a friend.

* * *

“Nice,” the client said looking Will up and down.

He was wearing a skin-tight pink dress with spaghetti straps, his hair was down and artificially curled. Will stood there acting demure and cute as the man circled him, as he typically did, checking out what he was purchasing. He nodded his head back toward the bedrooms. “Alright, come on. My lunch break is a little shorter today.”

In the bedroom Will bent over the bed as he was used to and the man tugged his dress up, leaving a smack against Will’s plump flesh causing it to jiggle. “Fuckin’ nice, man.”

Will had long since closed his eyes, tuning everything out. He couldn’t help himself, couldn’t stop where his mind was taking him. He saw Nigel’s face, his kind eyes, and imagined he was the man behind him instead. The man tugged his pink thong down, just enough to keep Will’s legs tightly closed and spread his cheeks, twisting the pink jeweled buttplug out and tossing it onto the bed before slipping into his already prepped hole.

Will gripped the sheets and whined. Loving the feeling of being full, always, no matter who it was. He ground his cock against the comforter thinking about Nigel’s hands on him, the way he touched him so softly as if he were made of the finest china. A chill ran through his body imagining himself kissing over Nigel’s tattoo, being held in his arms, his big veiny hands holding him possessively. He keened and nuzzled the comforter as the man behind him pounded in, making sure to make the most feminine soft sounds, the kind the client liked.

Will sighed Nigel’s name under his breath, so softly they would be mistaken as normal sighs of ecstasy. He remembered Nigel on his knees for him sucking him off gently through his red panties all those months ago. His palms stroking the skin of his thighs. Will cried and bucked forward against the bed coming hard against the sheets, Nigel’s name left over on his trembling lips. The man quickly finished soon after into his condom.

“Fuckin’ nice. Finally made you fuckin’ come.” The man panted as he did up his pants again. “See you later, man.” He put himself away and left with a slam of the door and Will was still face down against the bed as his breathing slowed. An immense amount of guilt spread through his body, through his every molecule like wildfire. Why had he thought of Nigel? He hadn’t thought of him in so long, why now? Will had never come with that particular client, it was all a fantasy, of a man who wasn’t his boyfriend. What was wrong with him? He lay on the bed, used and open for nearly half an hour, beating himself up mentally, and thinking about what it all meant.

* * *

**One Month Later**

The music was loud and Will couldn’t hear Hannibal over the music unless he was speaking directly against his ear. “Everyone’s eyes are on you, my love,” Hannibal had told him when they had first arrived, kissing his neck and rubbing the soft thighs under his dress.

They were both in the middle of a large booth in the corner of a club surrounded by twelve other boys from the brothel taking shots and making jokes, a few of them making out. They were all out celebrating Hannibal’s birthday but nobody was paying attention to the birthday boy. However, Will knew as soon as they were back to the brothel for the evening Hannibal and all the other boys would go to one of the rooms and have one big orgy. It happened every year on the day. Will participated the year before but this year he had already informed Hannibal he would be sitting it out.

The entire booth had already gone through nine bottles of champagne and everyone was feeling loose except for Will who sipped his Diet Coke and relaxed against Hannibal’s body while he could. 

“Are you sure?” Hannibal asked. “It won’t be the same without you.”

Will refrained from rolling his eyes. The year before he hadn’t given him a second glance, too distracted by the dozen naked bodies all surrounding him and touching him at once, taking turns sucking his cock and sitting on it.

“I’ll be okay,” he smiled. “I have some other things I want to work on. When we get back home you go have fun.” He rubbed his palm against Hannibal’s chest over his maroon and black suit that cost more than Will’s intended four years of art school tuition.

They kissed.

Will had become more relaxed of late, allowing Hannibal permission to kiss the other boys without having to ask every time. He knew he was the only one sleeping in Hannibal’s bed at night, the only one holding his hand in public. He felt as secure as he ever could. He was an expert at that point, ignoring what Hannibal did when they weren’t together. Being numb to it all was getting easier.

“You’re so perfect,” Hannibal kissed Will’s earlobe, tipsy and goofy. Will lifted his neck and Hannibal latched to it, sucking and licking, marking him. Will looked around the club at all the dancing men, couples, groups, three-way make-out sessions.

He people-watched as Hannibal was buried in his neck, his hand in Hannibal’s hair clutching his scalp and scratching gently with his nails when his heart skipped a beat.

Will saw someone in the crowd for a split second.  _ Nigel?  _ Had he been seeing things? It was dark, he must’ve been imagining it. He waited a while, eyes peeled when he saw the man walk by again, his face half clouded by a couple gyrating against each other. _ It is him.  _ He still wasn’t sure, but he had to find out.

“Baby, I’ll be right back.” He pulled away from Hannibal, a small hickey was already formed on Will’s neck.

Hannibal pouted but nodded.

“I’ll be right back.” He reiterated a bit louder so he could be heard over the music. “Too much Diet Coke,” he chuckled, already moving and starting to get out of the row of seats, moving past all the fellow brothel workers to the edge of the giant booth. He finally made it out and set out in search of the man he had just seen. Whether it had been Nigel, a lookalike, or his imagination, he had to know.

He looked around the dance floor, catching everyone’s eye. He was dressed in a skimpy black dress and lacy black thigh highs. Around his neck, a black choker with a platinum heart in the front holding the two pieces of velvet together. His hair was up off his neck but still falling in a few messy tendrils. He looked for five minutes, each second getting more and more discouraged. He got offers to dance from a dozen or so men but he completely ignored each one, only focusing on who he had seen.

The man was nowhere to be found. He deflated, his excitement leaving his body as he walked to the restroom, not wanting to make a liar out of himself. He was headed for the toilets off a corner corridor when the bathroom door opened and a man stepped out. He stilled and his eyes went wide looking Will immediately up and down, the scanning seemingly lasting forever, but Will didn’t notice, too lost in his own world.

_ Nigel. _

“Hey,” Nigel said.

Will nodded, swallowing nervously. “Hey,” his voice was so soft it wasn’t audible at all over the muffled music penetrating the closed-off hallway.

They stood awkwardly for a moment, Will staring down and fiddling with the strap of his dress near his clavicle.

“You really are here,” Will said under his breath.

“What was that?” Nigel raised his voice. He tapped his earlobe.“I can’t hear you.”

Will walked closer and they both rest their sides up against the hallway wall. Will’s heart was pounding at their proximity. He could smell the lingering scent of smoke on the man. His signature. “You really are here.”

“You stalking me?” Nigel smirked.

Will shook his head with a soft smile, gesturing his head toward the liveliness of the club. “Saw you from my booth. Got up to see if it really was you.”

“It’s strange seeing you outside of that place,” Nigel said. He licked his lips staring at Will’s bare shoulder wanting so badly to kiss him there, pull the boy against him and re-familiarize his hands with the boy’s lithe body. He hadn’t thought of Will consciously in months, he had done everything to get him off his mind. Now with seeing him again, all those feelings had sudden flown back. The dam had broken. Will was in his bones again. “Good. But strange.”

Will nodded. “Likewise.” He shifted in his black tennis shoes. “You look good.” He looked back up into Nigel’s eyes.

“Me?” Nigel chuckled. “Have you  _ seen _ you?”

Will blushed. He’d received compliments by the hundreds that evening already from strangers, but Nigel’s was the only one that made him even slightly giddy.

“What have you been up to?” Will said, genuinely curious. “Your job brought you back here?”

Nigel nodded. “Yeah. Like I’d thought it would.” A slight spat of venom laced those words.

The elephant in the room between them was ever apparent. Their silence filled with awkward tension.

“It wasn’t my idea,” Will said. “I just want you to know that. It was him. He felt threatened.”

“I figured as much.” Nigel nodded, understanding but still mad at the situation.

“I didn’t want him to ban you. I kept telling him you’re a good guy and you don’t mean harm but he…”

“I get it,” Nigel said, nodding. “Truly, it’s okay.”

It was a relief to Nigel, to hear Will didn’t hate him. That it wasn’t his doing.

“I didn’t know how to reach you,” Will said. “Your emails were gone from my inbox. I was going to apologize. I was…”

“Are you here with him?” He interrupted.

Will licked his lips, nervously tugging at the flesh with his teeth, and nodded.

“Then why are you here talking to me?”

They stood in silence for a moment before Will shrugged, his arms crossed against his chest.

“Just needed to see if it really was you.”

“What would that matter?” Nigel said, speaking before he could stop himself. He had come off a bit more harsh than he had intended. He was understanding, but still angry about the situation.

Will didn’t want to tell Nigel he had been on his mind lately, sporadically, but there. Sneaking in when he was least expected. No other client had ever gotten under his skin like Nigel had.

Will was silent, not sure what to say without the words making him feel unfaithful at his core. He yearned to get close to Nigel right there, to press his body against him and feel the man envelop him in a hug. He could use a good strong tight hug from a friend. He had missed the way Nigel made him feel when they were together. Beautiful, cherished, one of a kind. Not like Hannibal never made him feel that way, but Nigel was different. Perhaps because Will didn’t feel the need to impress Nigel, he could be whatever he was and Nigel would accept him. Will was always so scared to show Hannibal who he truly was. Too terrified of losing him. Knowing how unapproving he was of certain things. With Nigel he could say anything, do anything, without worry. Will loved that.

“You have a good life, alright?” Nigel said with a sad smile before starting to walk away. Seeing the boy was too painful, knowing he couldn’t have him in any way. That he was banned from his life and future. It was torture looking into Will’s eyes.

Will reached out and grabbed Nigel’s hand in his. “Nigel.”

Nigel gently pulled himself from Will’s hold, continuing to walk. His hand slipped away and Will turned. “Nigel, please.”

He walked out and didn’t turn back.

* * *

Late that evening, after the day had turned into the next and Hannibal was finished with the room of boys he showered and crawled into he and Will’s shared bed. Will pretended to be asleep, on his side cuddled up against one of their many pillows. He held his breath, waiting for Hannibal to wrap his body around his as he typically did when he joined him in bed but the touch never came.

Hannibal had gotten into the bed and stayed on his side, curled up facing away from Will. Perhaps he was too tired, too overstimulated with touch from his party. Will understood that. He excused it, allowing his mind to drift off and carry him into unconsciousness.

* * *

“You have a new client appointment at one this afternoon,” Frederick said to Will, handing out schedules for the day to the boys over breakfast.

Will took a bite of his Lucky Charms as he held the schedule, examining it. “New client?” He said with his mouth half-full. He swallowed and looked up at Frederick again, confused. He never had new clients whom he had never met make an appointment with him. He always met the men at the brothel first and got them addicted into becoming regulars after that.

“He was recommended your services by a friend, apparently,” Frederick said dryly, passing the other boys their schedules which started the typical morning chain of complaints and comments from the brothel workers.

“Oh fuck off. Really? A double pen at nine?”

“Day full of blowjobs,” another of the boys sighed.

“Oh yay, I love that couple. They always bring me chocolates.”

Will tuned it out, as usual.

* * *

At one in the afternoon, Will was paged up to the front of the brothel. Hearing his name over the house intercom triggered him into action. He hadn’t received any instruction for the client and wasn’t sure what he would like so he dressed casually in a simple navy blue t-shirt crop top and black dance shorts. If the client requested a different outfit Will would let him choose whatever he wanted from his closet.

He strut through the brothel, a confident bounce in his step as always. 

Will saw the man standing by the bar and he walked over to introduce himself. 

“Hi,” Will lifted his hand to shake the man’s. “I’m Will. I hear you were recommended my services.”

The man was handsome. Plain, but handsome.

“Nice to meet you,” the man accepted Will’s hand. Will could tell the man was timid, reserved.

Will tilted his head toward the bedroom. “Why don’t we go relax. Hm?”

He took the man’s hand and laced his fingers with his, guiding him back to his bedroom. Once inside he sat them both on the edge of the bed. The man sat stoically as Will began rubbing the man’s thigh over his slacks.

“What do you want from me, baby?” He breathed into the corner of the man’s neck. “I can wear whatever you want, do what you want. I’m yours for the next hour.”

The man’s nervousness was a turn on, Will was thrumming in his shorts.

The man took Will’s hand in his, halting his moments on his thigh.

“Stop,” he said.

Will sat back, removing his hand. “Of course. Nothing you don’t want.”

“I’m not a client,” he said.

Will’s eyebrows furrowed, confused. 

He reached into his pocket, producing a folded piece of paper, making sure to keep it out of the view of the camera and slid it into Will’s hand.

“From Nigel,” he said.

Will felt all the breath expel from his body all at once before coming rushing back in a dizzying wave. “What?”

“That note is from Nigel. He sent me to deliver that.”

Will clutched the note and hid it in the band of his shorts.

“Why would he do that?”

The man shrugged. “Fuck, I don’t know.” He looked Will up and down. “He paid me a grand.” He smiled softly. “I wish I liked guys. Nigel was right. You are beautiful. But you’re not my type. Have a good day, alright?” He got up from the bed and headed for the door.

“You can’t get a refund,” Will said the only thing he thought to say, the only thing he was programmed to say. 

The man chuckled. “It’s alright, it’s Nigel’s money anyway. Take care.”

Will got up immediately and headed to the restroom, away from the camera’s prying eye, so he could read the note he was given. It was a simple note with a phone number scrawled in Nigel’s messy handwriting signed underneath with a looping cursive ‘N’.

Leaving the restroom he gathered his iPad on the bed and typed the memorized number into his iMessage, praying the man had an iPhone. It had been so long, he didn’t remember.

_ W: Stop spending money so frivolously ;) _

Will held his breath before the three little dots that signaled someone was writing back popped up. He breathed a sigh of relief.

_ N: I want to see you again. _

Will’s heart fluttered. Had this man, this crazy man, just paid two grand for the appointment plus a grand on the bribe to sneak him his phone number? Will didn’t text anything back for a moment when Nigel was typing again.

_ N: I’m sorry for the club. I was still upset. Come meet me. _

Will didn’t reply.

_ N: I could use a friend. _

Will chuckled.

_ W: A friend? _

_ N: There’s nothing wrong with having a friend is there? _

_ _ Will remembered Nigel saying that all those months ago. He was right. There was no harm in it. But Will didn’t reply.

_ N: Come out for a Diet Coke _

_ W: Shut up. _

Will laughed and typed again.

_ W: When? _

_ N: Whenever you’re able. Just text me whenever and we can make the plans. _

Will could have told him off right there. Told him how wildly inappropriate it was to sneak him his phone number, to go to such lengths to contact him when he was banned from the brothel. But he didn’t. He wanted to see Nigel again just as much, just as desperately as Nigel wanted to see him. He typed a simple reply.

_ W: Okay.  _


	9. Chapter 9

Will woke up to a palm on his thigh and warm breath against the back of his neck. In his sleepy stupor, he reached his hand back to lace his fingers with Hannibal’s but he was denied. Hannibal’s hand shook free and he reached around to hold Will’s face. “Good morning, my beauty.” He was rubbing his nude body against his under the sheets. His cock hard against Will’s lower back. 

Will appreciated the attention, not having had much interaction with his man over the past couple of days but it was far too early. The sun had just barely started rising. A thin line of light streamed through their bedroom window overlooking the swamp. “Too early,” Will whined, shoving his face into the pillow.

“Never too early to show your Daddy love, my dear.”

Will rolled his eyes. Most times Hannibal referring to himself as _ Daddy _ it was hot, but at times like this, it was much more annoying than charming. He decided to change the subject if it would get Hannibal’s hands off him.

“I need to give you your birthday present,” he moved to sit up and turn on the bedside lamp.

They both covered their eyes at the sudden flood of fluorescent light with matching groans.

Will waited until his eyes had adjusted before opened his bedside table. “Shit, I left it in my room. I’ll be right back.” He grabbed his wristband key and padded out of the room to his client bedroom. The hallways were dark in that early morning glow way, with the light provided from the windows around the bar at the end. All the other boys were asleep. The place was dead silent which was a major contrast to the soft electronica that was always softly playing through the brothel during operating hours. Will felt like he was walking through the halls of an abandoned school, it was eerie. Will was rarely, if ever, up so early. It filled Will with a sense of discomfort he couldn’t quite place but he didn’t think too much about it.

He reached his room and gathered the present from under his bed and made his way back to Hannibal excited to give it to him. His man’s birthday was two days prior but he hadn’t gotten a spare moment since to give him the gift he’d been working on. Hannibal was a busy man. After his birthday orgy he had passed out and the entire day after that they hadn’t seen one another. Will finally had a chance to give him his drawing.

When he made it back to he and Hannibal’s room carrying the frame, Hannibal wasn’t there. Will’s eyebrows furrowed before he heard the soft tinkling sound from the bathroom. He sat down on the bed and waited for him to be finished. Hannibal washed his hands and walked back into the room looking as beautiful as ever. Fully nude, his hair a messy but still manageable quaff, his handsome face a bit drooped from sleepiness, the chest hair leading down to his cock made Will lick his lips. He lifted his drawing in its frame up to Hannibal.

“Happy Birthday, Baby.”

Hannibal crawled onto the bed and accepted the gift into his hand, looking down at it and smiling softly. “What is it?”

“Those are our hands,” Will explained, resting his head and soft hair against Hannibal’s shoulder.

It was a black and grey hyper-realistic portrait drawing of he and Hannibal’s hands laced together. The frame was gold plated and in an art-deco style. Hannibal held it for a while staring down at it.

“Your talent never phases to astonish me, my love,” Hannibal turned to kiss Will’s forehead. Will’s skin heated under that kiss. He lifted his head and captured Hannibal’s lips in a chaste kiss to follow it.

“If I had a debit card I could’ve bought you something much better.” Will’s eyes shifted to watch Hannibal’s reaction to that sentence. He had been looking for a way to ask about his money for a while.

Hannibal sat silent for a while. Had he heard him? Will shifted and opened his mouth to speak again and push the subject.

“When am I going to get access to my money? I don’t get to spend when I’m out. I don’t want to have to rely on others to pay for me all the time.”

“You’re always with me, you don’t need to use your money right now,” Hannibal said in a tone that said the conversation was over. Will took the hint but didn’t stop.

“I’ve been going out on the town with Randall recently. I’d like to buy my own things.”

“I can give you my card for when you go out without me to use.”

But Will didn’t want to spend Hannibal’s money. He wanted to spend his own. The delicate hostility in Hannibal’s voice, however, shut him up, not wanting to push him. Will just nodded and dropped it.

It was Hannibal’s turn to change the subject.

“What is this Frederick tells me about a client yesterday? He left immediately after he got to your room? What was that about?”

Will felt a lump in his throat. The man who had passed him a note containing Nigel’s number. He had no idea Hannibal had heard about the man leaving prematurely. But of course, he did. Hannibal knew everything going on under the roof of Desert Rose. Well. Almost everything. 

“Nothing,” Will shook his head, struggling to keep his voice even. “He um, he was straight, curious but definitely straight. He chickened out.”

Hannibal sneered. In a way that said; _ How dare somebody, no matter their sexuality, turn my beautiful boy down. _ “He doesn’t know what he was missing.”

“Mm, apparently not.” Will wiggled his eyebrows, an attempt to make Hannibal laugh.

They chuckled together and kissed.

Hannibal pulled back and spoke against Will’s lips, his hands still in Will’s long hair. “I have a lot of appointments today out on the town. I’ll be home late tonight.”

“Actually, I was going to go out with Randall after my appointment,” Will said. He only had one appointment in the mid-afternoon and after that, he was free for the evening. “We’ll probably get home much later than you.”

“Spending a lot of time with Randall lately, hm?”

“He’s a good egg,” Will said, laughing at his own words. “I need someone that can keep up with me from time to time, geezer.” He poked playfully at Hannibal’s furry tummy.

“Such a brat,” Hannibal shook his head. “I guess this is goodbye for the day then. Rock that clients world, like the good boy I know you can be,” he moved to kiss Will’s neck for a bit. “I’ll be watching the surveillance tape later. Put on a good show for me, hm?”

Will’s neck was tilted to the side allowing Hannibal’s wet warm assault, his breath deep as his love kissed him in the sensitive area.

“Yes, Daddy.”

* * *

He and Hannibal showered together, as always, and departed for the day with a final kiss. After Hannibal left, Will gathered and took breakfast in his room, immediately grabbing his iPad to send Nigel a message. He hadn’t named Nigel’s phone number or added it to his contacts, not wanting to put the man’s name in his device, just in case.

_ W: Does tonight work? _

He sat eating his Cinnamon Toast Crunch listening to some of his downloaded music waiting for a reply, but nothing came for thirty minutes. He shifted impatiently before realizing it was only eight in the morning, and Nigel didn’t seem like much of a morning person. He forgave it, surely the man must be asleep, probably somewhere in a smoky hotel room under many blankets. Will beat the fantasy from his mind of crawling under the sheets with the man and cuddling up into his stubbled neck, in a leftover cloud of nicotine.

Friends. They would only be friends.

Will didn’t want anything more than friendship from Nigel, he had Hannibal. His fantasies were only just daydreams, he told himself that again and again. He was safe in the confines of his mind.

He grabbed his iPad and headed for the brothel gym. There he did his morning routine; stretching out, doing his splits, lifting weights, doing weighted squats, a thirty-minute run, and more. By the time he was finished, it was around nine-thirty and he still had no reply from Nigel. Will was covered in sweat, his long hair was held back from his face in a ponytail, the ends dripping more sweat down his back. He pouted at the notification-less screen. He ran a towel over his face and neck cleaning himself.

Maybe Nigel has decided he didn’t want to see him after all? Meeting with him surely must be too much of a hassle. Too much of a risk hanging out behind Hannibal’s back. Perhaps it was for the best. Will felt immense guilt planing things behind his love’s back already. But he was only doing it because he knew Hannibal would never approve of their friendship. He and Nigel weren’t going to do anything romantic or sexual, so keeping it from Hannibal wasn’t a huge betrayal.

He was carrying his iPad back to his room when he heard it chime. He was so excited and caught off guard he nearly threw the device down the hallway on accident. Whipping the case open he stared down at it. The butterflies in his tummy were difficult to ignore.

He smiled.

_ N: I have a meeting at seven but after that I’m free. I apologize deeply for my neglect, I was catching some well needed Z’s. How are you this morning? _

Will considered taking some time to respond but couldn’t help how fast his fingers typed his reply and pushed ‘Send’.

_ W: I just got done working out. I’m stinky :( _

_ N: I bet you still smell like a garden of flowers, you ethereal little thing _

_ W: I’m a smelly gremlin, you have no idea. I may be cute but I’m still a man. With yucky manly smells. _

_ N: Well then stay away from me, I only like boys that don’t sweat and who are pretty twenty-four seven _

Will sent three laughing emojis. The thing he loved the very most about interacting with Nigel was the way their sense of humor melded together so seamlessly. Nothing was ever too serious.

_ W: Where do you want to meet? _

_ N: There’s an arcade downtown. I thought we would start there? Do you like games? _

That was something Will wasn’t expecting. He thought Nigel would take him to dinner or out to a club, maybe a movie. An arcade was the last place he would’ve expected the man to take him. But he enjoyed it. The thought of playing a game of mini-golf with Nigel was too pure, too sweet to keep a smile from his face.

_ W: I’ll kick your ass at skeeball _

_ N: Oh? Challenge accepted. _

Will felt excitement bubbling in his gut. He couldn’t wait to see Nigel and spend time with him. Away from the brothel. Away from the cameras. His chemistry with the man was unlike anything he has ever felt before and he wanted to explore it, platonically of course, but without the risk of anyone finding out or judging him for getting the companionship he desperately craved.

The iPad pinged again with a location and a message.

_ N: Meet me at nine. I’ll see you later, beautiful. _

Will blushed. He could never get tired of hearing Nigel call him beautiful.

* * *

“Do I want to know?” Randall said from the driver’s seat. Soft pop music played on a low volume in the little green Ford Focus as he sped toward downtown New Orleans.

“Probably not,” Will said with a laugh, his knee bouncing with excitement. “Thank you for the ride. I really appreciate it.”

“No problem, man. I told you I’ve got you.”

They sat in silence listening to music for a few minutes before Randall spoke up again.

“Are you hanging out with that one client?”

Will whipped his head over to Randall. “How do you know about that?” He suddenly felt like he had been dipped headfirst into a pool of ice water.

“It was just a guess,” Randall laughed. “An educated one. People heard he was banned and that’s all anyone talked about for a couple of days but nobody thinks about it anymore. It’s been months. So you’re really hanging out with him?”

“You can’t tell anyone.” Will’s voice cracked during his plea.

“I won’t.”

Will shot him a look, knowing Randall had the biggest mouth of anyone he’d ever met.

“Seriously,” Randall said. “Your secret is safe with me. I don’t want to cause any problems with you and Hannibal. When he’s not happy, nobody is happy. And you make him happy. So what about this client…”

“He’s just a friend.”

“I believe you.”

“He is,” Will reiterated.

Randall laughed. “I told you I believe you, man.” He stopped the car at the curb outside Will’s destination. “I’ll meet you back here at midnight, alright? Go have fun.”

”What are you going to do tonight?” Will said. 

“I have a date,” Randall said with a smile. 

“Really? That’s awesome man.” 

“I’m fucking with you, I’m seeing a movie. Men only want me if they pay for my body,” he pouted comically. 

“You’ll find a good man one of these days.” 

“I’m too picky,” Randall grimaced. 

“You are,” Will agreed. 

“Kinda difficult to date when you’re a whore for a weekend a month.” 

“Hey, some guys are into that,” Will shrugged. “Case in point.” He pointed at himself with both of his thumbs. 

“Yeah, well, Hannibal is a kinky bastard.” 

“He’s not the only kinky bastard in the world, though.” 

“That’s true.” 

Will’s features softened. He wanted to see Randall happy. He deserved it. He looked out the window at the arcade before back to his friend. 

“Please don’t say anything.” Will’s voice was soft.

“I won’t,” Randall assured, meeting his gentle timber. “You’re my best friend, Will.”

Will remembered Matthew saying that same thing before, and look at how he had betrayed him.

“My only friend, really,” Randall said.

Will put his hand over Randall’s, squeezing. “Thank you.”

“Any time, man.” Randall gave him that look again, the kind that bordered on romantic. Will detached himself, not wanting to give Randall anything to go off of.

“See you later,” Will smiled and got out of the car, heading into the arcade.

* * *

The arcade was for both children and adults but catered more toward the older crowd. It included a bar, music, and prizes that lined the wall toward the far end of the place. It was massive, dark and yet still well lit from the shining lights from all of the games. It was packed with people. Will remembered coming to a place similar to it as a child but he rid that memory from his mind.

He wore a pair of jeans ripped at the knees and a deep purple colored tank top. His hair was down in all it’s wavy glory. He scanned the place, it was a quarter past nine. Nigel must’ve been around somewhere. Will walked around for a while keeping his eyes peeled for the man, to no avail. _ Maybe he’s running late. _

Will found himself standing and watching a young couple challenge each other with a game of hoop basketball and laughed watching how competitive they were. They kept messing with each other, pushing each other trying to mess up one another’s shots. In the end, the couple tied with an equal amount of baskets from their respective machines and embraced each other in a kiss. Will smiled imagining that was he and Hannibal. _ Hannibal would never come to a place like this. _

“Hey, gorgeous,” Will heard from behind. He closed his eyes and felt the man’s voice run fingers over his skin, enveloping him in warmth. 

He turned, taking Nigel in. A meek smile on his face.

“Hey,” he sighed. He looked handsome, as always. He wore a white button-up and dress slacks. His long dirty blonde and grey peppered hair was behind his ears.

“You look positively resplendent,” Nigel said, his hands in his pockets. “Never fucking gonna get over looking at you.”

Will silently wished Nigel would put his arms around him. But that wasn’t a friendly thought. _ Was _ _ it? _

“Yes, that’s definitely something a friend says to another friend,” Will chuckled, getting closer to the man, not able to keep the distance between them any longer. He opened his arms and folded against Nigel who immediately wrapped his arms around him in return holding him tight.

Will closed his eyes and inhaled the man’s scent. The smell he’d been thinking about so much of late. He clutched at the back of Nigel’s shirt in their embrace. He could feel Nigel’s heart beating against his chest. It was faster than Hannibal’s was. While Hannibal’s heartbeat was slow and steady, Nigel’s thrummed faster, harder, rougher. It was calming for Will to rest against it, count the beats. He did so for a bit before he spoke up.

“So good to see you,” Will whispered, half hoping the music was loud enough it would drown him out and Nigel wouldn’t be able to hear him.

“Still so weird,” Nigel said into Will’s ear. “Seeing you outside of that place.” He tightened his grip on the boy just slightly, his cheek resting against Will’s hair.

They swayed gently in one another’s arms.

“Mm, that place is my home, you know.”

Nigel ignored that sentence, too worried to reply to it and have his words come off mistakenly confrontational. He continued to cling to the boy in his arms, shocked he was making contact with him again at all. He could’ve sworn his time with the creature was over long ago. What had he done to deserve such a blessing? Surely it was all a dream.

“But it is good to see you without cameras constantly looming over our every move, I’ll admit,” Will said. He pulled back and looked into Nigel’s eyes, who was looking at him in any way but friendly.

Nigel’s gaze flickered down to Will’s lips and he spoke quickly, desperate to change the subject.

“So, uh, what game do you want to play first?” Nigel said. “They have blacklight mini-golf but we have to sign up, might take about an hour to get in. Or I could buy us a bunch of tokens and we can just play little arcade games. It’s up to you.”

Will’s face heated and he bit down on his lip at how adorable Nigel was, he was trying hard to be accommodating and generous. He was acting like a schoolboy with a crush, similar to how he had acted the very first time they had ever met. It was beyond charming. This man nearly twice his age, acting like a nervous child.

“I’d like to play some mini-golf, in the meantime, we can play games while we wait our turn?”

Nigel nodded, smiling.

“I should warn you,” Will said with a sly smirk and a click of his tongue. “I am very…very…competitive.”

“Mm, that fucking makes two of us.”

* * *

“You know you’re supposed to make it _ in _ the hole, right?” Will teased on their third mini-golf tee. Nigel was on his fourth attempt to get the ball into the hole and was having difficulty with it.

His white shirt was glowing brightly under the black-light.

“This is impossible,” Nigel shook his head. “Fucking rigged. You try.”

Will lined up at the starting area and sunk a hole in one, a cocky smirk on his face. Surprising himself but keeping himself composed from cracking up until the shocked jaw-dropped look on Nigel’s face sent him into a giggling fit.

“You little shit,” Nigel gasped.

They both cracked up, Nigel shoved playfully at Will’s chest who was incapacitated with laughter.

They continued playing for hours, after mini-golf, which Will won at a landslide, they headed over to skeeball.

That was Nigel’s game. While Will continued getting the lowest amount of points at the bottom Nigel continued to sink the upper corners and highest points again and again.

“How do you do that?” Will pouted.

Nigel didn’t hesitate, moving to stand behind Will. “Take it in your hand, like this.” He showed him the pressure one should hold the ball. He held Will’s wrist and arm underneath his own, his body folded over his. Will could feel Nigel’s heartbeat against his back again. He tried to focus on the game at hand.

“Now when you go back,” Nigel maneuvered Will. “Once you get about this far back you’re going to go forward and keep the ball rolling, follow through, make sure it doesn’t bounce, okay? Roll it. Fast.”

He pulled Will’s arm back and forward, the ball slipped from Will’s fingers and rolled across the velvet and up and into the corner hole getting the highest points possible. Will gasped and turned to Nigel, his face glowing in excitement. “Holy shit! I did it!”

“You did!” Nigel smiled. “Try it again on your own.” He stood back and watched Will do it again but this time on his own.

Will followed Nigel’s instruction, sinking the second-highest points but it was a hell of an improvement.

“See! It fucking helps doesn’t it?”

They continued playing, moving to different games around the arcade for hours until Nigel was taking Will by the waist informing the boy he was regretfully in desperate need of a smoke break. “You can keep playing if you want, I won’t be long.”

“No, I’ll go with you,” Will insisted, clutching to the man’s shirt.

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah, smoke doesn’t bother me. It’s okay.”

Nigel looked around and located an _ employee-only _ door.

“Are you up for breaking some rules?”

Will’s eyebrows lifted. “Always.”

* * *

They made it up onto the abandoned roof and both sat down on the ledge overlooking downtown. It wasn’t precarious, the ledge was wide and allowed them both a lot of room to sit comfortably. 

“I’ve never been on a roof before,” Will said excitedly, his long hair blowing in the wind as he looked out at all the lights.

Nigel covered his cigarette with his hand as he lit it. He took a deep drag, holding the cigarette at his side away from Will, wanting to limit the boy’s exposure to the smoke as much as possible.

They were quiet for a while, enjoying the comfortable silence between them before Nigel found himself staring at Will’s profile, lit up with virgin excitement of being so high up above the city. The moon cast the boy in a bluish hue. He looked even more ethereal than he typically did. Alienesque. Nigel was captivated, just as much as he had been the first time he ever laid his eyes on the boy. How was one human so breathtakingly beautiful? 

He took a drag and exhaled away from the boy, holding the cigarette at his side again before speaking.

“You’re even more beautiful in the moonlight,” Nigel said.

The words blanketed Will in warmth. But along with them a thin throw blanket of guilt accompanied it.

“You can’t say things like that.”

“Friends compliment friends.”

“Not when those friends have had sex,” Will looked at Nigel. “Not when one of those friends is in love with someone else.”

He regretted saying it the second it came out of his mouth.

“I’m sorry. If it makes you uncomfortable, I will stop.”

_ Please. Please never stop. _

Will nodded. “That’s probably best.”

They sat in silence once more. The night had been amazing. Fun, exciting, really a good release away from the everyday stresses of life. Will didn’t want the evening to end, but he needed to get back home to Hannibal. But not until he pushed the boundaries a bit more and broke a rule or two more.

“Can I try that?” Will said nodding at the cigarette Nigel was currently taking a drag of.

Nigel exhaled with a chuckle and a light cough shaking his head. “No.”

“Why not?”

“You’re too pretty for this shit,” he held the burning stick up for emphasis.

“Oh come on,” Will pouted. “Let me live a little. I’m not asking for the whole pack. I just want a little taste. I wanna know what it’s like.”

“Okay,” Nigel said holding the cigarette backward for Will to take. “You’ll hate it.”

Will took it with his delicate fingers and held it with all five of his fingers, very obviously inexperienced.

“Don’t inhale it into your lungs,” Nigel instructed. “Just a shallow puff.”

Will put it to his mouth and took a deep drag, sucking the smoke all the way in before exhaling. He held the cigarette at arms distance as he covered his mouth with the crook of his arm and began coughing heavily.

Nigel chuckled taking the cigarette from Will’s fingers and rubbing the boy’s back gently with his palm patting. “I told you not to fucking inhale so deep. Are you okay?”

Will’s coughing eventually turned into laughter. “Damn. That shit is rancid.”

“I could’ve told you that,” Nigel said puffing again.

“Why do you do it?” He continued coughing sparingly.

Nigel shrugged. “I’ve done it since I was fourteen. I don’t remember a time without it.”

“Have you ever thought about quitting?”

“The thought has crossed my mind before, but not for very long. That man of yours is gonna smell the smoke on you.”

“It’s a good thing the club I told him me and Randall are going to tonight is full of potheads and chain smokers.”

“So you _are_ lying to him?” Nigel said.

“I have to,” Will said. “He banned you for a reason. If he knew I was here with you right now...I don’t know what he would do.”

“Why are you risking it? You love him, right? Why would you risk him finding out and lashing out at you for it? I’m a fucking nobody. Why agree to hang out with me?”

“Because you’re one of the few people who treat me like I’m a human,” Will spoke before he could think.

They look into each other’s eyes.

“I should probably go,” Will hopped down from the ledge. “I’m supposed to meet my ride at midnight.”

Nigel got down from the ledge too, snubbing his cigarette out against the concrete.

“Was this a one-time thing? Or can I see you again?”

Will wanted to end it right there. Tell Nigel that, yes, it was a one-time thing and they would never see one another again. But he couldn’t. Couldn’t bring himself to. He loved spending time with the man. He knew the risks. He didn’t care. He wanted to get lost in the forest of Nigel’s hazel eyes.

“Next week? I’ll message you,” Will said.

“In that case,” Nigel closed the distance between their bodies. He caressed the backs of Will’s bare arms with his knuckles. “Wear comfortable shoes. I’m taking you dancing.”

“I can't dance,” Will shook his head.

“With the risk of sounding crude, I’ve seen those hips in action. I call bullshit.” Nigel chuckled.

Will could work a pole, and a cock, however, he was useless at partner dancing.

“I will stomp your feet to dust.” Will smiled.

“I’m so scared,” Nigel feigned. He pulled Will into a hug after whispering a soft _ Come Here _ and began to sway the two of them together again. They held one another for a while before Nigel spoke.

“I don’t want to let you go,” he whispered.

Will stood shocked.

“I’m sorry. Fuck I’m sorry,” Nigel added.

“It’s okay.”

Nigel leaned back and reached up to caress Will’s face with the back of his hand. The boy’s soft skin was like velvet against his knuckles. They were so close. So very close. Nigel glanced at Will’s lips.

Will thought about it.

Hannibal kissed the other boys. Him kissing Nigel wouldn’t do any harm. If Hannibal could do it he could too, right?

Will leaned in a bit before looking down quickly, breaking eye contact and shaking his head. “No, no I can't.”

Nigel needed to change the subject quickly to avoid Will thinking about it too much. Ashamed of his own actions as well.

“Where’s that drawing you promised me all those months ago?”

“You remember that?” Will laughed, finally looking up again. 

“I never forget when I’m owed something.” He winked.

They laughed.

“I’ll bring it to you next time.” He remembered the quick doodle of Nigel he had done not too long ago. He would bring that for him during their next meeting.

Will’s phone began ringing. _ Randall _. He answered. “I’ll be right there.” He looked up at Nigel. “I have to go.”

Nigel dropped his hands from Will’s body and walked back over to the ledge and moved to sit on it again.

“Are you not leaving?”

Nigel made himself comfortable on the concrete again, lighting another cigarette. “Nah, I’ll stay up here for a while. I’ll see you later. Get home safe, alright?”

Will nodded and turned to meet Randall downstairs.

* * *

The entire ride home Will and Randall sang along to the radio, scream-singing the lyrics to popular songs from the era of their adolescence. Will had an extra giddy smile on his face through it all. Randall knew better than to ask what happened between Will and the client. While Will sang he couldn’t get Nigel’s face out of his head, the music erased the guilt. 

* * *

Randall dropped Will off at Desert Rose, earning him a huge hug from Will and a multitude of thank you’s.

He knew Randall’s college dorm, where he lived full time, had been an hour the other way from the city and he had another long drive ahead of him.

“You’re such a good friend,” Will said, squeezing Randall tight.

“Anytime, man,” Randall said. “Just call me any time and I got you.”

They said their goodbyes and Will got out of the car, waving after Randall as he drove away. Will watched him speed down the dirt road in the near pitch dark feeling giddy, like a teen girl after her first date, but that feeling was quickly stamped out as soon as he turned around and looked at the brothel. The large neon sign spelling out Desert Rose was still burning bright, casting the parking lot in a red hue.

The place was desolate, everyone inside had gone to sleep already, that much was obvious from the lack of life from the windows. Hannibal’s town car was in the parking lot so he was back home. He loved his life at the brothel and with Hannibal, so why did walking up the steps of the place feel like he was a bird flying back into its cage?

Will let himself in with the keys he kept with him and immediately headed toward he and Hannibal’s shared bedroom when he found himself stopping at the bar.

A pack of cigarettes lay there abandoned.

Nick was the only boy at the brothel who smoked. Typically he left his stuff on the patio outside but the dampness of the outside of the pack told the story of the rain that must’ve come through the area while Will was gone. Will took one cigarette from the pack along with the lighter and the ashtray and headed toward his client bedroom, not thinking what he was about to do. Giving in to his urges.

Once he was inside his room he kept the lights out, not wanting the cameras to pick up anything he was doing. The room was pitch dark, never supplied with any windows. He lay back on the bed, keeping the ashtray next to his thigh.

He rested his head against the pillow and flicked the lighter open, lighting the cigarette. It wasn’t lighting properly. He pouted before realizing he had to put his mouth on it to get it started. He sucked a shallow breath through the filter lighting the stick, coughing softly inside his elbow. He didn’t plan on smoking it, he merely wanted the scent.

It wasn’t the same brand Nigel smoked, but it was close enough.

With the hand not holding the cigarette Will unbuttoned his pants, shimming them down enough to reach into his briefs and stroke himself. He held the cigarette up, flicking ashes into the tray when he needed to and inhaling shallow on the tip to keep it going as he stroked himself.

The only light in the pitch-black room coming from the burning ember on the end of the stick. But Will’s eyes were closed, Nigel’s face was in his mind. The smell was adding a fourth-dimension to his fantasy. He could still feel the man’s hands on his body from earlier, hear his gruff voice in his head, and now could smell him, strongly. He was surrounded by him. It was as if they were together in that way again.

Will came right as the cigarette was running out, all that was left was the filter. He put the cigarette out against the ashtray as he continued stroking himself through his orgasm. Out of his lips, in a shaky breath, he exhaled Nigel’s name like smoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to warn people to please read the tags once again. I did change one of the tags from “possible main character death” to “main character death”. I finished fully outlining the story so I changed that tag since I know for sure what is going to happen now. 
> 
> It won’t happen until closer to the end but I do want to warn people of that now in case it triggers anyone. Also there will be some abuse both mental and physical coming up, so please read with caution!!


	10. Chapter 10

Nigel had finally gotten over the boy. He had finally scraped away what little remnants Will had left on his mind when he saw him again in that fucking club. Seeing the boy again had sent Nigel’s mind rolling down a steep hill with boiling lava at the bottom, no handhold in sight, not a single boulder to grasp onto to avoid the certain catastrophic fate. He knew, even while hanging out with the boy at the arcade, there wasn’t any future between the two of them and he would only end up being hurt in the end. But he couldn’t deny himself the boy’s company, no matter how utterly destroyed it would leave him.

He knew all too well. And yet Nigel couldn’t bear to part from him.

_ Am I crazy or had Will looked at my lips? _Nigel constantly found himself thinking, even a week after their little hangout. They had moved their conversation to WhatsApp, which was much easier to hide, as they texted daily. They chatted about nothing in particular but conversed about how their respective days were going. It made Nigel feel a little less lonely, he imagined it was the same for Will, but how could Will be lonely? He had Hannibal. Nigel didn’t have anyone except for his greasy shitbag friends who couldn’t be relied on unless a million dollars was on the line.

_ N: I want to see what you drew today. _

_ W: It’s so bad, I’m so displeased with how it turned out. _

_ N: Show me _

Will would send Nigel photographs of his artwork every day and with each drawing, Nigel found himself regretfully falling harder and deeper. He wanted to message Will, telling him how beautiful and talented and perfect he was, but he refrained. Responding only with messages such as ;

_ N: Wow! That’s really good…What do you mean it’s bad? _

_ W: Thank you. _

_ N: An artist is always their worst critic. If others think it’s good, it’s fucking good! Don’t worry your pretty head. _

Will sent a couple of yellow-heart emojis. Yellow, being the color of friendship. Nigel’s heart always sank when he received those.

They made plans to meet the next day, downtown again. Nigel planned on surprising Will with where they were going. He couldn’t wait to see Will’s beautiful face light up when he found out.

_ N: meet me at noon Thursday, can you make that? _

It was one of Will’s rare full days off. Hannibal would be busy with another round of recruitments and “quality testing” as he called it, so it wouldn’t be any trouble. Randall had agreed to drive Will already, he was just waiting on time.

_ W: I’ll be there. _

He sent another yellow heart.

It was difficult to text with only one hand.

* * *

Over the past week, Will had been doing a lot of thinking, beating himself up and wondering what time would be best to talk to Hannibal again. About everything. Will wanted to be with Hannibal. Forever. He was deeply in love with the man. But eventually, he did want them to settle down and be together, only them. Was the entire thing, their dynamic, simply a phase? Or was it the foundation for their entire relationship even years down the line? Because if it was only for the time being, Will was okay with that. But not forever.

Never forever.

Will loved his life with Hannibal, how kinky it was, how hot, how open, but it was not something he wanted for the rest of their lives. He needed to know what to expect and if Hannibal would ever consider just having _ him _. Will didn’t want to be a working boy forever. He enjoyed selling his body, it got him off, it pleased his boyfriend, and it gave them the fuel behind their hottest sex. But, Will didn’t know how much more he had left in him.

Before Desert Rose, Will was shy with his body. Now he was someone he didn’t recognize, at times, someone he didn’t even like. Those moments were fleeting of late but they were still there. Ever prevalent.

Will wanted monogamy. Eventually. Whether his boyfriend wanted that too, Will wasn’t sure. But, he avoided asking. Knowing Hannibal in the past had made it abundantly clear that he wasn’t interested in monogamy, but he didn’t say whether or not he would ever consider it in the future.

* * *

Two days before he and Nigel’s second round of plans, Will was sat at the bar sketching while drinking his Diet Coke, keeping to himself, when the jeers from the other boys started. He was quickly reminded why he typically kept to his room instead of venturing out into other parts of the brothel during working hours.

“What are you drawing there, Willow?”

“Probably something for Daddy again.”

“Pathetic.”

“Always trying to impress Daddy with _ her _ ugly artwork.”

“Looks like scribbles on paper to me!”

The boys laughed and bumped against each other, all shirtless and already drunk, waiting for the next wave of walk-in clients to come in. Will gathered his drawing pad and glass and hopped down from the barstool, ignoring them and setting off to his quarters.

“Hey! We’re fucking talking to you!” One of the newer boys Will didn’t even know the name of put his hand on Will’s shoulder wheeling him around to face them again.

Will gazed forward at nobody in particular, just zoning out. He was constantly taunted by the other boys because they were jealous, it wasn’t anything Will wasn’t used to by then, having dealt with it for just over a year. But this felt different. Normally Will could laugh it off, but with everything on Will’s mind of late, that wasn’t an option. Will’s father had always taught him that when someone is bullying you it’s best to knock them on their asses, but Will hated his father, refusing to ever be like him, and he had never taken that advice to heart.

Until that afternoon.

“Just a fucking placeholder for Hannibal’s next main, you know that don’t you? He’ll find a prettier younger model and you’ll be destitute, out on that perky little ass in the mud soon enough. Y…”

The boy didn’t get the rest of his words out because Will had lost all control and had taken his glass full of Diet Coke and cracked it full force across the boy’s face breaking it and cutting the boy’s skin as well as his own hand with an angry frustrated scream.

The boy was left in a heap on the ground clutching his bloody face shouting profanities. Will stood over him with his fist bloodied and clenched, so angry that he couldn’t feel the pain. His ears were ringing, not able to hear anything around him as he stared down at his handiwork with malice burning behind his eyes.

The boy on the ground had taken Will’s inner monologue and spat it into his face. Will couldn’t help but attack it, finally giving him a way to beat up a physical version of that constant taunt within his mind. He shook, beginning to cry. The other boys were staring at Will in disbelief and fear, but he didn’t notice, turning his heel and walking away, trailing blood from his hand in his wake.

* * *

“Honey?” Hannibal said, letting himself into Will’s client bedroom hours later. He had been out during Will’s loss of control.

Will had been sat on his bed in the same place for those hours, deep in thought and holding a towel around his bleeding left hand, staring forward at the wall-length mirror in front of him, past his own reflection. Will knew there were bits of glass still stuck in his skin, but he didn’t care enough to remove them.

Hannibal sat down on the bed and Will twitched when he felt his hand touch his arm. “Some of the boys told me what happened. Are you okay?”

Will began rocking back and forth in place, shaking his head silently.

“Why did you attack him? Was it warranted?”

Of course, the boys hadn’t told Hannibal what had truly happened. They constantly taunted Will behind Hannibal’s back, but once confronted they always played the victim. Will hated every single one of them.

“He…” Will tried to speak, inhaling and wiping his face with his uninjured hand. Will wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell Hannibal what was said. Didn’t want to embarrass himself for getting so offended over the words. But he needed to get it off his chest. “He told me I was a placeholder. That you were…” he exhaled, looking up into Hannibal’s eyes. “That you would find a new main and I would be kicked out.”

Hannibal’s face was difficult to read, not changing from the beginning of Will’s speech to the end.

He sighed. “And you believed that?”

“What else am I supposed to believe?” Will’s voice cracked. “There were mains before me. There will be mains after me, I assume. Right?”

Hannibal moved a strand of Will’s long hair behind his ear. “Not if there doesn’t need to be.”

Will’s eyebrows furrowed. “What does that mean?”

“Here, let me see what you’ve done to yourself,” Hannibal changed the subject grabbing for the towel.

Will yanked his hand and bloody towel away from Hannibal to hold against his chest.

“Honey, please. Let me help.”

Will’s heart melted at the softness behind those words. He wanted to hate him. So badly. But love was clouding that hate.

Will dropped his hand and Hannibal opened the blood-soaked towel. Will had pieces of glass stuck in the heel of his hand and tips of his fingers. His hand was coated in red. “Thank God you didn’t knick your wrist, darling.” Hannibal got up to walk to the bathroom to pour a large warm bowl of water and grab a soft washcloth before making it back to him. Will was glad it was his non-dominant hand he had injured. If he had hurt his right hand and wasn’t able to draw for a while, he didn’t know what he would’ve done. Drawing was his only escape.

Hannibal set up his cleaning tools on the bedside table and went to work with forceps to get each piece of glass out. He worked in silence as he pulled a dozen pieces - ranging from tiny to just over an inch long - of glass out of Will’s hand. Afterward, bringing the basin forward and dipping Will’s hand into it. Will grit his teeth, the bowl had a mixture of water and alcohol in it and it burned. Hannibal gently washed Will’s hand with the cloth under the water before he spoke again.

“What I mean, my love, is that there never has to be another main again. As long as you’re happy here. All my other mains have left of their own accord, not because I haphazardly replaced them.” The basin of water was slowly turning red. “Or if you’re so miserable you don’t want to be here anymore, then I’m not going to force you to stay here. If you don’t want to be here, I don’t want you here. I would rather have someone who is excited to bask in my company and the way I run things. Not someone who feels like they have to change who they are to fit my lifestyle.”

“I want to be here,” Will said softly, closing his eyes and focusing on the soft nurturing feeling of his love’s hand gliding over his in the basin, cleaning him.

He did want to be there, for Hannibal and Hannibal only. Not for the clients, not for the money, not for the other boys. Only for Hannibal. But sadly with Hannibal came all those other things. There was no separating them.

“I know you do,” Hannibal said. “But I also know…”

“Will you marry me?” Will said, opening his eyes and looking into Hannibal’s. “Not…now. But eventually, would you want to get married? Get a dog. Move to another city? Just us? Maybe somewhere near the mountains?” He began to cry, his bottom lip trembling unable to help it, imagining the life he truly wanted. With his love at his side. “With me? Just me?”

Hannibal’s face was stone cold stoic. His hand had stopped moving over Will’s in the basin.

“I don’t know.”

Will nodded. “It’s okay to not know now,” his voice cracked. “But I have to know. Is that a future you would ever…ever consider? Eventually?”

“I don’t know if marriage is for me,” Hannibal said starting to clean again. “And you’re young. Don’t you want to experiment? Experience life before you settle down like that? Use that hot little body while you have it? Hm?”

Will shook his head. “I know what I want. I don’t need to search anymore.” He leaned in and pecked Hannibal’s lips, who didn’t reciprocate. Will ignored it. Excusing it because Hannibal was lost in thought.

“You take such good care of me. You always have.” Financially and sexually Hannibal was perfect, but emotionally there was always a disconnect between them. Hannibal didn’t like talking about feelings, didn’t like talking about the future. He preferred to live in the present, having fun and avoiding talking about serious topics. Will struggled with that, needing to talk and express himself and with Hannibal, he always felt like he couldn’t do that. It was like pulling teeth trying to get Hannibal to show a bit of his humanity.

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” Hannibal said.

Will nodded. He could tell Hannibal was uncomfortable. And as badly as his entire body was bursting and needing to talk and find some semblance of peace, he let it go. Not wanting to upset Hannibal or make him angry with him. Not wanting to do anything to risk losing the roof over his head.

* * *

Will plucked mindlessly at the bandage of thick gauze on his hand while Randall drove. Will had cracked the boy’s head open with the glass two days prior and had done nothing since except for draw and try to distract himself from the awkward conversation he had had with Hannibal. He focused on Nigel and their text conversations, and looking forward to the next time he would be able to get out of the brothel for a while and see him.

Will’s clients over that time weren’t bothered with his bandaged hand, continuing to use his body in the same ways, regardless. Most didn’t even mention it, or ask what had happened. Not caring. Only caring about their own pleasure. Once again, nothing Will wasn’t used to.

“This is the place,” Randall said stopping his car outside a big tan building with aging columns. A street full of people were bustling around outside it. “At least this is the address he gave you.”

Will looked out the open window and saw where he was. The _ New Orleans Museum of Art. _He smiled, his eyes sparkling, staring at the place for a moment too long.

“He’s probably waiting for you, goofball,” Randall playfully shoved at the back of Will’s shoulder. “Go! Oh hey, the art museum, that’s thoughtful of him…”

“Yeah…” Will kept eyes on the sign, a smile tugging at the side of his mouth.

“Go!” Randall reiterated. “I’ll meet you back here at nine, okay? I have two exams to study for. Hopefully, I don’t hit any traffic trying to get back into downtown.”

Nine hours. Will would have Nigel to himself, as friends of course, for nine whole hours. He was buzzing with excitement. He would have normalcy, simulated, for _ nine whole hours _.

“Okay,” Will said, opening the car door and getting out to lean into the open window. “Thank you so much for the ride, once again.”

“No problem!”

Will blew Randall a silly kiss and wave before he sped away. He turned facing the crowd, giddy with excitement.

_ Where is he? _

* * *

Will spotted Nigel on one of the marble benches, distracted, scrolling on his phone with one hand, with a lit cigarette in the other. He was wearing a black short-sleeved button-up, open, with a white wife-beater on underneath and a pair of cargo shorts. It was the most casual Will had ever seen Nigel dress, and he typically didn’t dress very fancy, to begin with. There was something very charming about it, Will liked it a lot. He had also dressed for comfort, sporting plain dark jeans and a mint green cotton t-shirt. It was from his old art school days, promoting one of the local diners near the campus in white flowing text.

Will plopped himself down on the bench next to Nigel.

“You come here often?”

Nigel looked up and chuckled, taking the last drag of his cigarette before stamping it out into the standing ashtray next to the bench and winking.

“Could you maybe help me find someone?” Nigel said. “I’m waiting for a young man, cute with long hair, kinda snarky, confident but a tad bit hesitant and awkward…endearingly? A little shit. He’ll probably be strutting around here, he knows how hot he is, I’m sure. It’s near fucking frustrating.”

“Sounds like quite the tool,” Will pulled a face. “You sure you don’t wanna dump him and come hang out with me instead?” He placed his uninjured hand over Nigel’s against the marble and squeezed.

“Like friends, yeah? I hate to break it to you, but I’m currently emotionally unavailable.”

“Oh yes, like friends,” Will said.

They laughed together.

They stared into each other’s eyes for a moment too long.

Will finally broke their eye contact and gestured with his neck toward the museum. “I thought we were going dancing?”

Nigel got up and offered Will his hand to help him up.

“That’s next time.”

“Next time?” Will pouted. “Is that your way of getting me to come back?”

“Oh, definitely…” he noticed the thick bandage on Will’s other hand. “What happened?”

Will shook his head, gesturing flippantly with his other hand. “Something stupid, I’m just a big ole klutz. Don’t worry, I’m fine.” Will was an expert at downplaying things and lying when necessary. This was his time to relax and enjoy Nigel’s company, he didn’t want to re-open that wound, not when he was supposed to be having fun. “It’s not my drawing hand, so I’m fine.”

Nigel nodded, catching the hint to drop the subject, pulling the boy into himself. He held the back of Will’s elbows, caressing his thumbs under the sleeves of the boy’s shirt as he smiled at him. His voice came out soft. “I thought you would enjoy the museum, I don’t know if you’ve ever been here, but…”

Will had been asking Hannibal to bring him on a date to the art museum for months. But he kept that to himself. He shook his head. “No, I’ve never been. To this one, at least.” He had gone to art museums for school field trips back in high school, but never for leisure. 

“I’m not much of an art guy, but I can surely appreciate beauty when I see it,” he looked the boy up and down. The play on words was not lost on Will. _ God created his finest art when he made you, _ Nigel found himself thinking. “I regretfully do not know the difference between a Monet and a Van Gogh.”

They turned to walk into the museum together.

“I’ll teach you,” Will said with a wink, slipping his hand into Nigel’s and lacing their fingers together.

Nigel started at the touch looking down at their joined hands, a confused expression on his face.

“Friends can hold hands, can’t they?” Will pouted. “That place looks big, I might get lost.”

“Better stay close to me then,” Nigel said.

“Gladly.”

* * *

“All I see is paint splotches,” Nigel said staring at a modern artwork. It was a gigantic white canvas with a couple of red and blue splashes of paint across it. “I could do that. Hell, a toddler could.”

“That might be so,” Will said, he hadn’t let go of Nigel’s hand the entire time. “But it’s meant to evoke an emotion. You have to open your mind. That’s what I enjoy so much about art, it can be interpreted in thousands of different ways, depending on your personal life and background.”

“What do you see?” Nigel was curious.

Will stared at the art, his thumb caressing the top of Nigel’s hand in his hold as he allowed himself to drift into the painting.

“I feel like that blue splotch there, the way it’s reaching out toward the red, the red is forbidden. The blue craves the red, but can’t reach it, stuck on the canvas, not given any means of movement, not sentient, inanimate forever. So close, yet so far away. It craves an escape, something different. But it’s trapped. But it has the red in sight, no matter what, it doesn’t lose hope. Even though it should feel hopeless, it doesn’t.”

Nigel chuckled. “That’s deep.”

Will shrugged. “That’s art.”

* * *

They walked around the museum for hours. Nigel didn’t like, nor understand, modern art, which was okay. Will was having the time of his life experiencing it all with Nigel’s hand in his. Nigel was fascinated with the ancient art section, however, pointing excitedly at the tapestries on the wall and the century-old sculptures. They read every placard describing each piece, taking turns softly reading them aloud to one another, lingering glances from the one being read to toward the reader.

By the time they were finished at the museum, the sun had set completely.

“Holy shit we were in there for six hours,” Nigel chuckled, checking his watch. “Felt like five minutes.”

Will squeezed his hand a bit tighter. “I’m hungry.”

“You read my fucking mind.”

* * *

Nigel got them a table at a nice restaurant on a rooftop terrace in the corner so they would have privacy. A wall of standing foliage separated their table from the other patrons. When they sat, it was the first time their hands had parted since they had first clasped hours ago, other than bathroom breaks. 

”Oh! Here, I almost forgot.” Will pulled the sketch from his pocket. “It be a bit wrinkled, but...” 

He handed it to Nigel. He took it graciously, amazed, as always, by Will’s talent. Staring down at the drawing and smiling.

“You drew me?” 

“A few weeks ago, yeah.” He blushed, embarrassed to be admitting that. 

“I love it,” Nigel said. “You even got my tattoo in there.” He ran his thumb over the drawing. 

“I did,” Will nodded. 

Nigel folded it back up and put it in his shirt pocket for safekeeping, patting it for emphasis. Keeping it close to his heart. 

“Thank you.” 

“Any time.” 

Nigel ordered for the two of them, filets and veggies, Diet Coke and scotch. They talked about the museum and what they thought while they ate.

“I enjoyed it a lot,” Will smiled, taking a sip of his favorite drink. “Thank you for taking me.”

“It was my pleasure. I’m pleasantly surprised I enjoyed it as much as I did.”

“You weren’t expecting to like it?”

“No, not at all.”

“Was it the art or the company?” Will wiggled his eyebrows.

“I would enjoy anywhere and any activity if you were with me, frankly. Even a...musical,” he grimaced.

Will sat back, his jaw-dropping. “Wait, you don’t like musicals?”

Nigel pulled a face, crossing his arms on the table, leaning forward. “Not in the slightest.”

Will pushed his chair back, joking. “Alright, I’ll be going now.”

They laughed.

“They’re just so…fucking cringey.”

“Maybe you haven’t found the right musical?”

“Maybe you’re right,” Nigel found himself staring at Will’s bandaged hand on the table for a moment. They had had such an incredible day and Nigel didn’t want to ruin it. But the question was burning in his mind. He couldn’t stop himself from asking.

“Is everything okay?” He nodded to the bandage.

“What do you mean?”

“Forgive me,” Nigel said. “Is he…is he hurting you?”

Will followed Nigel’s eyes to his hand.

“I told you I’m a klutz, this was my own doing,” Will said, beginning to fold in on himself like a wilted flower, his body language telling Nigel he was entering dangerous territory and to drop it. “No, he’s not hurting me.”

“Okay,” Nigel nodded, looking back up into Will’s eyes. “Not physically, then. I mean, is he treating you well? Is he cherishing you?”

“I don’t believe that’s any of your fucking business.”

“Will…”

“What do you think is going to happen? From us hanging out like this? We’re friends. Flirty, yeah sure. But just friends. Do you think I’m going to leave him? For _ you _?” Will looked Nigel up and down, a forced look of disgust on his face. “You?”

He hated himself from the moment he said it. But he continued.

Nigel sat back in his seat, he had struck a deep nerve in the boy. “I never said, nor assumed that. We’re just hanging out, aren’t we?”

“We should stop doing this,” Will said. “I’m scared he’s going to find out. I can’t lose him.”

He sat there staring at the white tablecloth dangling above his lap, his eyes brimming with tears. Deep down, he knew Hannibal wasn’t right for him. He was lashing out at the one person who treated him with true unadulterated respect and adoration, but he couldn’t stop. Will hated change. He wanted to go back to the early days, when he had first arrived at Desert Rose, back when Hannibal only had eyes for him. But those days were long over. Will was clinging to the past, stubbornly, like it was a rope, burning his bloodied palms, maiming him down to the bone, but he was refusing to let go.

Will pushed his chair back and got up to leave. Nigel got up at the same moment to grasp Will’s hand to get him to stay.

“Let me go,” Will said, rushing out. Ashamed of what he had said to Nigel, how awful he had just been to him. He left and called Randall asking him to pick him up early, tears rolling down his cheeks.

* * *

The ride home was dead quiet, Will kept his gaze out the window trying to wipe away his tears inconspicuously hoping Randall couldn’t see them, but of course, he did. At least he had the decency to not pressure him or ask questions. He gave him his well-needed space.

Upon getting back to Desert Rose Will rushed in and headed back for he and Hannibal’s bedroom. Hannibal, unsurprisingly, was in there with one of the other boys, laying underneath the young man and being ridden by him.

“Hey, baby,” Hannibal greeted Will, gripping the boy’s thighs on either side of his body. “Come here.”

Will moved robotically, driven by his one need to please his man. He was finished with Nigel. Deadset on it. Will was going to focus on he and Hannibal’s relationship and be everything for him. Change if he must. Learn to be everything he hated but Hannibal loved. He did not want to lose him. He would do anything he needed to.

He stripped and joined the two men, taking turns fucking the other boy, watching the boy and Hannibal nuzzle and kiss. Will was numb to it. He needed to be. He stamped down his overwhelming urge to cry, not wanting to anger or upset his love. He would conform. He would change. He would be the perfect partner for him, no matter how much of himself he needed to sacrifice.

After the other boy left Will and Hannibal nuzzled up against one another, too exhausted from their days to make it to the shower to wash off. They kissed each other’s lips.

“You’re perfect,” Hannibal whispered to him, petting Will’s face and long hair.

Will smiled, all he ever wanted to be in life was perfect. For him.

* * *

Will’s conscious brain wanted Hannibal, his first love, his provider, the man he had spent over a year of his life with. Many laughs, a lot of hot sex, and sharing a hearth for so long, had made Will hopelessly devoted to the brothel owner, sewn to him for good with thick rope, no sheers in sight.

But when Will was asleep, his true hidden desires emerged.

“Harder,” Will cried, clutching at the man’s hair above him, pounding into his body. He nuzzled the man’s neck, right over his tattoo, kissing there. He pulled back looking up into Nigel’s eyes, his body open for him, his legs around the man’s waist, holding on as he was slipping back and forth against the sheets.

“Nigel,” Will whined.

Nigel crushed their lips together and they breathed each other’s air. It was the thousandth time their mouths had touched, in this alternate universe, and it never got old.

In his sleep, Will clutched the pillow under his head with a white knuckle.

He came, not only in his dream, but in he and Hannibal’s shared bed. Still nude from their encounter just hours before. He awoke with a start, reaching down to realize what he had done, laying there in the dark thinking about the movie his unconscious brain had just thought up. It was just a dream, but it felt so real. His heart yearned for the man in the dark. The smell of his smokey skin and hair, the way his hands gripped his body. His brain piecing it all together, how his hand had felt in his for hours the day prior, simulating that against more private parts of his body. It had been so long since he and Nigel had had sex, but his brain remembered everything. He remembered months ago how Nigel sounded when he came. He played the noise over and over in his mind.

Will turned over to face Hannibal and nuzzled up against him. Treating him like an empty body to use for his overwhelming desire. He gently woke him up with a kiss, closing his eyes and imagining Nigel instead. Easily stamping out his guilt in his hazy cloud of sleepiness. Not caring. He was going to do what felt right. Driven by his deep carnal desires. 

Hannibal awoke and began kissing back lackadaisically.

“Baby, go back to sleep.”

Will shushed him. Hannibal needed to be quiet so he could better imagine the other man on his mind. They kissed for a while in the pitch dark of the room, Will’s thighs wet and sticky from his nocturnal emission. Hannibal’s lips stopped moving, he was back asleep again. Will pulled back, finished with him.

Will turned and grabbed his phone, hiding under the covers to transcribe a message to Nigel. It was just past three in the morning.

_ W: I’m sorry. _

Will waited a couple of minutes, staring at the screen, waiting for a notification. He had ruined it, hadn’t he? He had been so heartless. He wouldn’t put it past Nigel to never want to speak to him again. He was moving to set his phone down on the bedside table again when it vibrated in his hand. He turned it quickly to see a single text from Nigel in response.

_ N: I know. _


	11. Chapter 11

fanart by @jocomhba on Twitter!

_“I had a dream, I got everything I wanted…But, it might have been a nightmare.”_

_\- Billie Eilish (everything i wanted)_

The breeze over the ocean was strong that day, sending the long tendrils of Will’s hair back as he looked out past the cliff at the water hundreds of feet below them. It was a gorgeous day, the sun was shining brightly in all its glory above them, it was mid-spring and flowers were blooming in the gardens nearby. The roses sewn into the arch Will stood underneath were a deep shade of mauve, their stems, and thorns a dark emerald. The hands in Will’s were strong and possessive. Will turned his head from the view and forward at the man he was marrying. 

The man was wearing a tuxedo with golden trim, his hair, defying all laws of physics, didn’t move in the wind. Hannibal’s hands were squeezing his, a loving and proud smile on his handsome face.

“Do you, Hannibal, take Will as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold…”

The man to the left of them spoke while Will staying staring into his love’s eyes. Lost in the hazel. How had he gotten so lucky?

“I do,” Hannibal said.

Will’s heart soared. Hannibal wanted him, and only him. It was everything Will had ever dreamt of. He began to cry, silent tears streamed down his face.

He was enough.

Will cut off the minister half-way through the vow directed at him, saying a quick, “I do.” Not a single doubt in his mind. Their audience chuckled at that, Will tuned it out, focused on nothing but his love.

“You may kiss,” the minister said.

Hannibal yanked Will into him by his lower back and their mouths touched. Hannibal’s hands went to Will’s hair, carding his fingers through to hold his head, deepening their kiss. The audience stood and clapped as white and red rose petals showered down on them.

They pulled back from their embrace and looked into one another’s eyes, Will’s hands clutched in the sides of Hannibal’s suit looking up at him. Hannibal began to cry, but what came streaming down his cheeks wasn’t clear saltwater, but red and viscous. Blood.

Will thought nothing of it, such was normal. “You are all I want,” Hannibal told him, his cheeks streaked in red. Will held his face, stroking the bloody tears away with his thumbs. Happy to have his love’s…his husband’s…sole affection.

Will held him for a moment more, marveling at his fortune. Kissing his lips again before their hands were clasping and they were walking down the aisle past their clapping guests.

All of the brothel workers were there hooting and hollering, saying goodbye to “Daddy”. Will didn’t think anything of it either, when he saw his father there, holding his hand up with a kind smile. He waved at him. Will was swelling with overwhelming happiness that his father approved, not just of his sexuality, but of him, for the first time. Matthew was there, holding his girlfriend Lana’s hand, both of them nodding and smiling. Will squeezed Matthew’s other hand in his as he made his way down the aisle, Matthew clapped him on the back. “Congrats, man!”

Everything was so perfect. Will had his love, his best friend, his father’s approval. Everything was right. Will could die right then and be content.

They were almost to the end of the rows when Will saw a man, sitting in a seat closest to the aisle. He was looking down at first, his hands in his lap, until Will’s eyes fell on him. The man looked up and he and Will’s eyes met. At that exact second, everyone around them stopped clapping and the world fell silent. The wind had stopped blowing. The only thing Will could hear was the pounding of his own heart.

Everything felt wrong. This wasn’t Will’s ending, not his happily ever after. 

He had made a mistake.

The man in the seat, the man with the neck tattoo, kept staring at him.

Will stood confused for a moment, lost in the stranger’s eyes. His husband’s hand in his had fallen lax from his hold. Will turned and Hannibal was a statue, marbled and preserved. His eyes facing forward at nothing, continued to bleed, a stark contrast of crimson against the snowy white and blackened stone. Everyone in the audience had disappeared. Rows and rows of empty chairs surrounded them. 

Will turned back to the sitting man who had stood up and had begun to walk over to him.

Will didn’t say a word, he wasn’t scared, he was surprisingly craving the man’s closeness. The man placed his hands on Will’s cheeks. He didn’t move forward, didn’t try to claim his lips, just caressed his face with gentle thumbs over Will’s own tear-streaked face.

Will nuzzled against the man’s palm, resting against one of them, his eyes closed.

His haven.

This was where he was meant to be. _ This _ was what felt right.

Will lifted his hands to hold the man’s wrists and caught sight of the platinum wedding band on his own finger. The damage was done. He had no escape. Will’s heart plunged straight down to his stomach. The feeling making him sick. He had chosen incorrectly and now he was stuck.

Will looked into the man’s eyes one last time in apology before he pulled back and began running as fast as he could the other direction toward the edge of the cliff. He jumped and plummeted toward the water, his heart in his throat. He broke through the surface and into the freezing blanket of midnight blue.

He opened his eyes and looked up, barely able to make out the sun from his depth. He tried to scream but nothing came out. He reached up in an attempt to swim back up but lost the fight, no longer caring. The other side of the water was a prison. He preferred to sink.

* * *

Will woke up coughing and sputtering, clutching his pillow. He turned in the bed and Hannibal wasn’t there. He was alone, he settled down against the bed again calming his breath, thinking about his dream and what it all meant.

Hannibal hadn’t woken Will up with his typical morning kisses for the past few days. Will could feel himself slipping from Hannibal and he couldn’t stop it. He could scramble for the string holding the balloon, grip it tight, keeping from it from slipping away, or he could let it go. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do yet. All he knew was that was he miserable.

What was his unconscious telling him of late? He hadn’t seen Nigel in a few days, had barely talked to him in that time over texting, still thoroughly embarrassed by his own words and actions. How cruel he had been. Nigel had never been anything but kind to him.

_ Surely, Nigel has realized I’m nothing but an obnoxious child by now. _

Whenever Will closed his eyes he saw Nigel. Not Hannibal. And that terrified him.

* * *

_ “Do you think I’m going to leave him? For _ ** _ you _ ** _ ?” _Will had said.

Nigel heard those words over in his mind again and again since Will had said them. He had never assumed a future for he and Will, nothing beyond friendship. He wasn’t an idiot. But those words hurt. They stung deep, crystallizing his veins with the insult. The blood circulating through his body brought the words into the forefront of his mind every few moments. The torment was constant.

Will had apologized and Nigel had forgiven him, and yet the way Will had said that one word, ** _ You? _ ** continued to bother him. What was so bad about himself? Had Will meant it or was he just trying to convince himself that Nigel was so despicable?

Nigel didn’t know anything of Will’s home life, how things were getting on at Desert Rose. Will didn’t like talking about it, always avoiding and changing the subject when they were together. Saying Hannibal’s name in front of Will was akin to speaking a slur. The word so beyond offensive that Will would lash out immediately.

What was Hannibal doing to him?

As soon as Nigel was back home in his hotel room, even before receiving Will’s apology, he had dug into his pocket to produce the drawing Will had done of him. He put it up the wall next to his bed with a hammer and nail and stared at it. Nigel knew something was wrong with Will, but there wasn’t a way to save him. Because Will didn’t want to be saved. All Nigel could do was hold on, spend as much time with the boy as he allowed, if he would have him, and try to show him that things could be so much better on the other side.

* * *

“I’ll never get used to this,” Will grimaced as the needle was injected into his vein to begin drawing his blood.

The STD testing was weekly but it was always a pain. Will hated needles. If Hannibal hadn’t been holding his hand during his small hand tattoo months prior, and for his bellybutton piercing months before that, he would’ve chickened out and the STD testing was very necessary and mandatory, otherwise, he wouldn’t have anything to do with the damn things.

The testing always took place in a private sterile room at Desert Rose. The boys would line up out in the hallway and they would be tested with physicals one by one as well as having their blood drawn. Hannibal, who always had somewhere else to be, went first. He didn’t sleep with clients, but he slept with the boys, and while he only slept with Will condom-less, it was always better to be safe than sorry.

“It’s just a bit, you know that,” the privately hired brothel physician, Doctor Zeller said.

He took the blood and labeled the tube with Will’s name, as usual, sliding it into his tray next to all the other boy’s blood for one-hour testing as soon as he was back at his practice.

He checked inside Will’s mouth for sores, using his pen light to look in the corners while Will stuck his tongue out. 

“Good. Nothing out of the ordinary,” Zeller said making a note. “You all have been using condoms during oral sex every time, right?”

”Usually.” Sometimes Will forgot, or he consciously didn’t because he was getting his photo taken by Hannibal for the website. Condoms ruined the aesthetic for the photos, Hannibal had told him. 

“It should be all the time,” Zeller said. “I’ve told all of you boys, and Hannibal, this again and again. You’re lucky none of you have ever contracted syphilis. 

Zeller went to work lifting up the stirrups on either side of the hospital style bed. 

“Alright, Will. You know the drill. Lie back for me.”

Will sat back and put his feet where he was used to putting them when the doctor lifted his gown, inspecting Will with a clinical detachment looking for anything out of the ordinary. Will had gone through it dozens of times before and it never really bothered him, until then. He relaxed on the table looking up at the ceiling of the room.

Will had never, thank God, contracted a single disease. Not yet. But, why was he putting his body under such a risk? Will had slept with hundreds of men over the past year. Just how many of them had STDs? How many men had Will unknowingly slept with have HIV? The clients were never tested. Will’s health was at risk every time he slept with a client. The only thing stopping Will from contracting something was a thin piece of latex, that could easily break. Before, Will had never really thought about the consequences. Young, feeling invincible. But it all felt so wrong, so fast. Dr. Zeller wiped at the head of his penis with a cotton swab per usual to take another sample he stored away.

_ This is the last time I will ever do this. _Will found himself thinking. What did that mean? He didn’t know.

Did he mean it?

Will was excused and he headed straight for his room, immediately gathering up his iPad and emailing all of his regular clients still associated with his work email, that he was taking a break and their appointments were all put on hold for the time being. Not caring or thinking about the consequences.

* * *

“I’m taking a break,” Will said, before one of his clients could email Hannibal asking what was wrong and tattling on him. He thought it would sound better coming from him, rather than like he was hiding something.

“What do you mean?” Hannibal was distracted, stood in front of the stove cooking the evening’s meal. He was busy grilling loins of meat, flipping them over with tongs and adding more seasoning.

Will’s arms were crossed over his chest. “I’m taking a break from seeing clients right now. I need…” he sighed. “I just need a break, baby. I haven’t had one for a year.”

Since Will had started taking clients at the brothel he had had six sessions with clients per week. At least. It had been nonstop the entire year.

“Did you not consider my feelings about this?” Hannibal’s voice had dropped, to a much more serious tone.

“Your feelings? It’s my body.” Will couldn’t stop himself from saying. “I already emailed them, canceled the upcoming appointments.”

“Indeed,” Hannibal dropped his tongs and whipped around. “It is your body. But it’s my business. And if you wanted a break you should have come to me to ask first. What are these men going to do now? Figure out you’re unreliable and go to another brothel. Find a new…” Hannibal looked Will up and down. “A new _ pretty boy _ to pay to get them off. You’ll lose all of them and you’ll lose Desert Rose thousands. So, what I need from you right now,” Hannibal walked closer, placing his hands on Will’s shoulders. “Is for you to get back on your little device and send them all another email taking back what you’ve just said. You’ll be seeing your regular Thursday clients tomorrow.” He was speaking as his boss, not as his boyfriend. It came off so cold. 

He turned back to his stove picking up the tongs once more.

Part of Will wanted to cry, beg for forgiveness, give in and go do exactly what Hannibal had just instructed. But he couldn’t hold his tongue. He didn’t want to give in to him, again. He wanted to stand his ground and fight for himself. “No,” he said, shaking his head. “No. I’m taking a break.”

He didn’t know how long the break would be, but he couldn’t stand the thought of having another stranger’s hands on him again any time soon.

“Will…” His voice was a warning.

“No,” Will said. “I need this. Suggest the other boys to the clients so you don’t lose them, if you must. But I can’t right now.”

Hannibal sighed.

“And I can’t convince you otherwise?

Will shook his head. He stood terrified of how Hannibal was going to react. Hannibal turned to him and placed his hands on Will’s cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” Will said, his voice breaking.

Hannibal shushed him softly. He kissed Will’s forehead.

“Take your break, baby.”

Will’s heart thrummed, clinging to Hannibal’s wrists. He had expected Hannibal to be harsh and deny him.

“But the money from the client appointments already scheduled that you so haphazardly canceled will be taken from your savings. Deal?” He took one look at Will in warning, daring him to say something, when he didn’t Hannibal turned back to the stove.

Will didn’t say a word. He was shocked, standing in place. Who was this? Was this who Hannibal has always been? He didn’t dare argue. All he knew, right then and there, was that he needed to get out.

* * *

Since Will no longer had clients he had more time during the day for his art and for texting with Nigel. He sketched him again, with charcoal in one of his special sketchbooks, taking his time. Drawing Nigel was cake, Will could so easily picture his face. It was the face that had been plaguing his dreams.

Will’s hand bandage had finally come off, the cuts hadn’t been too deep so they healed rather quickly. Giving Will much more comfort and flexibility while drawing.

Will and Nigel had made another set of plans but they would have to wait a full week. Nigel’s job was running him into the ground. Every time Will heard the application on his iPad chime, his heart would flutter.

_ W: Are you actually taking me taking me dancing this time? _

_ N: Bring comfortable shoes. _

_ W: So is that a yes? _

_ N: You’ll see ;) _

_ W: Why are you so cryptic? Just take me dancing, old man. What are you waiting for? _

_ N: You told me you would crush my toes, I’m trying to bide my time. A man needs his feet. _

Will smiled down at his screen. Nigel never forgot a single one of their conversations. It was as if Will was Nigel’s favorite subject. He loved that. Nigel was his biggest fan.

* * *

Sex with Hannibal had changed over the past month. The sex itself wasn’t bad, but there was a major element missing in Will and Hannibal’s time alone together.

Passion.

Their shared bed, which once held an unyielding flame, was now a flickering pilot light. They barely made eye contact during sex, their kisses were lazy, their moves premeditated and lackluster, and Will no longer felt that hard pang in his chest when Hannibal would touch his most sensitive areas.

He could still make Will come with a genuine wail, and Hannibal knew all the right buttons to push, but it didn’t feel the same. Will had been lying to himself, pretending everything was fine for so long.

Hannibal had broken Will’s trust long ago, and since then the passion had been dwindling until it was unrecognizable. They were going through the motions. Will was too scared to admit it was all coming to an end.

* * *

Will was getting dressed for he and Nigel’s meeting when he came across the note. Stuffed in the corner of his pants drawer. He didn’t realize what it was until he was unfolding it. Upon seeing it again his heart sank. He hated revisiting that day, that moment when he had first discovered it.

It was Matthew’s departure note, telling Will he was leaving and not coming back. He still didn’t know what he had done wrong to make Matthew leave. Had he not been a good friend? What had happened? He hid the note away again, too attached to that tiny piece of Matthew to depart with it. Even if he didn’t want him, he held on, just like everything else in his life.

Will was laid out on the entrance foyer chaise longue waiting for Randall to pull up for his ride, sketching, when Hannibal approached him from behind. He wrapped his arms around him, kissing Will’s earlobe.

“You look pretty. Where are you headed?”

Will was wearing a sunflower clip in his long wavy hair, a thin yellow v-neck shirt, black dance shorts, and yellow tennis shoes. A tiny sunflower charm was hanging from his belly button. He’d put on a bit of highlight on his cheeks and nose.

“Me and Randall are headed to the French Quarter. Boys day out again.”

“You’re probably going to want to shop, hm? Take my card.” Hannibal handed his credit card to Will.

“No,” Will shook his head. He would be with Nigel, but he couldn’t very well tell him that. “No, it’s okay.”

“Take it, please? Pay me back out of your savings later if you’re so stubborn to use your own.”

“Thank you,” Will said softly. The card was heavy, probably one without a limit. 

Hannibal kissed his lips. “Have fun.”

Will slid the card into the little inside pocket of his shorts.

* * *

“You look incredible,” Randall commented during their drive. “Truly fucking wow.”

“Thank you,” Will said. “You look good too, buddy. You don’t think this outfit is too much? It is extremely feminine, for daytime.”

Will had been out in feminine clothing before, but only at nightclubs in the evenings. Never out in broad daylight where there would be people and families everywhere. Perhaps he hadn’t thought it through enough. He tugged at his shorts nervously.

“I think it’s very tasteful. You’re not in a bra and panties or anything.”

“You don’t know what I have on under this,” Will wiggled his eyebrows.

They both laughed.

“Sans bra,” Will followed up. “Just to confirm.”

“Not just your outfit though. It’s in your smile. Your entire demeanor. You seem so happy.”

Will was bouncing in his seat excited to see Nigel. It had been so long.

“I am happy,” Will said.

A silence filled the air for a moment before Randall got the courage to ask a question.

“Do you like him?

Will didn’t want to hide it anymore. It was already so obvious anyway. He nodded.

“Yeah, I do.” His eyes were soft looking at his friend.

“What about Hannibal?”

Will stayed silent. Even he wasn’t sure. He still had feelings for Hannibal, though of late things had been confusing. He still loved Hannibal. But Will wasn’t quite sure what he wanted. Some days Hannibal was perfect, and things were like the old days, and some days, were nightmares.

“I don’t…I don’t know…” Will bit the inside corner of his cheek staring out the window.

“Go to where your heart leads you,” Randall said. “Be with someone who makes you smile. We have one life. Why waste it somewhere you’re unhappy?”

Will thought about those words the entire rest of their ride.

* * *

The traffic to the store Nigel had suggested they meet in front of wasn’t too crazy. Even with it being a Friday afternoon. Randall drove down the street and his phone sounded off, informing the two young men the location they were looking for was thirty feet away and on the right.

Will’s heart burst when he saw Nigel from afar, gripping the car door handle, half tempted to open it while the car was still moving so he could run to him. Nigel hadn’t seen them yet, he was turned the opposite way reading one of the store’s signs.

“Is that him?” Randall said.

Randall had never before seen Nigel.

Will nodded, another giddy smile on his face. “Yep.”

Randall chuckled. Just then, Will reminded him of a puppy excited to get to the park, waiting for the door to open so he could run and be free.

Randall stopped the car behind an inconspicuous Nigel and Will rolled down the window.

“Hi, could you help us with directions?”

Nigel turned, a big smile on his face hearing Will’s voice.

“Oh yeah?” Nigel walked up, leaning on the open window, an unlit cigarette in his hand. He flipped it around in circles again and again in his fingers. “Where are you headed?” He acknowledged Randall too, but he was mostly looking at Will.

“We’re trying to find this place called Desert Rose? Don’t know if you’ve heard of it.”

“No, doesn’t ring a bell. Sounds like a pretty seedy place.” Nigel winked and Will’s heart fluttered.

_ You have no idea. _

They smiled at each other.

Nigel turned to Randall. “Thank you for bringing him. I know you live far.”

Randall clutched the steering wheel, shocked by Nigel’s politeness. He had assumed Nigel was one of the uncaring bad boy types Will typically spoke about liking. 

“It’s really no problem. I enjoy spending time with him on the drive.”

“Well, here,” Nigel said reaching into his pocket to produce a roll of hundred dollar bills. Three-thousand dollars. He handed it to Randall. “For your troubles.”

Randall hesitantly accepted the money, almost fearing it would explode in his hand.

“Go on, take it.” Nigel’s voice was kind. “It’s my present for always doing this. For Will. For me.”

Will looked back and forth between them, from Randall’s shocked face to Nigel’s. Nigel was one of a kind. Will melted into his seat.

“Thank you,” Randall said. He, along with all the other boys at the brothel, made a fraction of what Will did with his clients. The money was quite a lot and would go a long way. It was an entire weekend of work for him. “I wasn’t expecting anything.”

“I know you weren’t. But I had to say thank you.” He opened the door and Will clambered out to stand next to Nigel as he still stood hunched in speaking to the driver.

“You have a good fuckin’ night, alright? I think Will should be good to be picked up around midnight again. If that’s alright with you?”

“Yeah,” Randall said. “I’ll meet you two back here.” He pocketed the money, still shocked at Nigel’s kindness. He nodded up, referring to Will. “Take care of him.”

Nigel winked. “Always, my friend.”

He shut the door and Randall drove off. Will waved after him before turning back to Nigel. He wrapped his arms around Nigel’s waist and looked up.

“That was nice of you.”

Nigel moved a strand of Will’s hair back. “He deserved it. He’s a good friend to you.”

Will nodded. “The best.”

A silence fell between them. Will had apologized via text but he needed to say it to Nigel’s face.

“I’m sorry for last time, I…”

Nigel shushed him gently, swaying their bodies together. “You don’t need to. I know.”

Will smiled meekly. They got lost in each other’s eyes again.

Nigel looked Will up and down, marveling at the boy’s outfit.

“God, you look good. Fucking beautiful.”

Will bit his lip. “You don’t look so bad yourself,” he winked.

Nigel was wearing a plain black shirt and black slacks. The darkness in contrast to Will’s springtime colorful beauty.

“Yellow is your color, babe.”

_ Babe _. Will blushed.

“We have all day to ourselves. Almost twelve hours.”

“Then let us make the most of them.” Nigel slid his hand into Will’s and they started together down the street.

* * *

Will had been to the French Quarter dozens of times, but the streets had never looked so bright and beautiful as they did with Nigel’s hand in his. They wandered into various shops, window shopping and pointing out things they enjoyed the aesthetic of, learning even more about one another in the process.

“This band,” Nigel said holding a vinyl of _ The Dark Side Of The Moon _. “Changed my fucking life.”

“Pink Floyd?” Will read the vinyl. “My dad used to like them a lot.”

Nigel groaned putting the vinyl back. “You make me feel so ancient, sometimes.”

Will chuckled. They continued absentmindedly flicking through vinyl albums on their own as they spoke.

“You never listened to them with your father?”

“Of course I did._ ‘Another Brick In The Wall’ _ got me through high school. That song was on every moody art kid’s playlist at some point or another.”

“There is hope for you yet,” Nigel squeezed Will’s hand in his.

“What do you know about this album?” Will pulled out a pink vinyl with a girl on it. Britney Spear’s _ …Baby One More Time. _

Nigel sighed. “I take it that’s a favorite of yours?”

Will chuckled. “Nah, I’m not _ that _ gay.” He put it back.

* * *

Nigel’s hand laced in his, made Will feel invincible. He was self-conscious about wearing something so feminine in public, in broad daylight, for the first time. He had gotten multiple dirty looks, but was able to easily ignore them. Nigel’s_ I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude _coursed through his hand and into his own. Plus the gorgeous man was a hell of a distraction.

They happened upon a jewelry shop an hour into their walk through the quarter.

They separated to peruse the store, and while Will was distracted Nigel bought him a bracelet. He gifted it to him immediately after they left.

“I bought something for you in there.”

“Nigel…you didn’t...”

“Yes, I did.” He pulled the white bracelet box from his pocket and opened the hinge.

Inside was a chain of sunflowers, the insides of the flowers were all small karat diamonds.

Will stood staring down at it, his mouth agape.

“It was too perfect.” Nigel took the bracelet from the package and signaled Will to lend him his wrist.

Will didn’t move, too shocked at the extravagant gift.

“Let me put it on you. You’re gonna be all fucking decked out.”

Will lifted his wrist and watched as Nigel clasped it onto him. The diamonds sparkled in the sun above them. He twisted his wrist slightly watching them glisten. Not even Hannibal had ever bought him something like that. He didn’t even want to ask what it cost.

“It’s beautiful,” Will said. “Are you sure it isn’t too much?”

“I’m sure,” Nigel said. “You are its rightful owner. It shouldn’t belong to anyone else.”

“Thank you,” Will whispered, dropping his wrist to look up into Nigel’s eyes, his gaze finding Nigel’s lips again.

They clasped hands and began walking down the street again.

* * *

“I love street music,” Will said, a smile breaking out on his face as they got closer to a band. They had heard the tunes from a mile away, but getting closer they could see multiple people dancing around and standing watching the musicians.

The saxophone, trumpet, French horn, and drum players were playing their hearts out in the center of the square. Them, combined with the sights around them, painted the perfect picture of New Orleans.

Will had a very specific memory of getting lost on a field trip when he was in elementary school. He had been walking in line with the other children and had gotten distracted and stopped in the middle of the square to watch the street band. He was in awe of the beautiful sounds and lively colors, tapping his little feet to the music as he got lost in it all. Ten minutes had passed when Will realized he was alone and had gotten separated from his class and teacher. He began to cry and a kind stranger helped him phone his school, who contacted his teacher.

Minutes later his teacher greeted him, gathering the weeping kindergartener into a frantic hug. 

“Oh, honey,” she smoothed Will’s curls with her hands. “You scared me half to death. Are you okay?”

Will nodded, chewing on his little knuckle. A habit he had picked up doing from watching his father pour his eighth glass of bourbon in a single evening.

The teacher looked from the band back to the small boy. “Oh, my Dear,” she smiled at him. In a way that reminded Will of a mother he had never known. “You’re going to be an artist one day.”

Will never forgot those words.

And now, fifteen years later Will was doing the same thing, lost in the street music, but this time he wasn’t alone. He was with someone he admired. Someone he adored.

Nigel and Will had stopped to listen to the music together. Will was stood in front of Nigel, his arms wrapped around him, holding the boy close against his body. Nigel’s chin rested on Will’s shoulder and his fingers played gently along the soft skin of Will’s exposed naval. Nigel toyed with the small sunflower charm hanging there, his nails tickling there, sending little shockwaves through Will’s relaxed body. Nigel’s face was nuzzled in Will’s neck, and Will’s eyes were closed allowing himself to melt back into Nigel’s body.

Nothing else existed except for them at that moment.

* * *

“I love dogs,” Will said, twirling his spoon against his fork in the bowl of pasta set in front of him. “I had four growing up.”

They had walked around the quarter for hours until the sun had begun to set. They then retired to the restaurant Nigel had made a reservation for them at. A little Italian bistro set on top of a bar. It was casual but it still held a sense of elegance.

“I had a dachshund,” Nigel said, cutting his Chicken Parmesan and taking a bite. “Well, it technically wasn’t mine. It was my neighbor’s. She would let me come over after school to play with it and take it for walks. I’d like a dog of my own, but I travel too much.”

“You’ll have one eventually,” Will said taking a sip of his drink. “They’re a lot of fun.”

The music from the outdoor bar below them permeated the restaurant, the gentle thumps could be heard through the floor.

“You wore your dancing shoes tonight, I see,” Nigel winked, taking a sip of his drink.

Will chuckled. “You weren’t joking about that, were you?”

“Not in the slightest.”

* * *

“I’m awful at dancing,” Will held onto both of Nigel’s hands, in the middle of the dance floor. “With someone else.”

It was dark outside by the time they finished their meal and made it to the outdoor bar. It was lit up with streams of lanterns, a large wooden dance floor was erected in the center. Popular music was playing over the crowd. Multiple couples were dancing around them while they struggled to find their footing in the center.

Nigel began gently moving his arms back and forth getting Will to loosen up. “C’mon, I suck too. We can suck together.”

“We already have,” Will smirked.

“Don’t be a pervert right now.”

“You expect any less of me?”

“No, not really,” Nigel smiled. “C’mon get out all those jitters.”

They both shook their bodies, Will making a comical sound like he was tumbling down a hill.

“That’s it,” Nigel lifted one of Will’s arms and twirled him, before pulling the boy against by him the small of his back.

Will’s eyebrows raised. “Wow, that was good!”

“Nobody is watching us,” Nigel urged. “Go again.” He twirled him again faster catching Will in a dip, their faces inches apart, and bringing him back up again. “I’ve always wanted to try that.” His face blushed red.

“You feel good about yourself now?” Will chuckled, his eyes continuing to linger on Nigel’s lips.

“I feel like Superman,” Nigel said.

“Ew, no. Feel like Iron Man, if you’re going to feel like any comic book hero. Robert Downey Jr. is dreamy,” he bat his eyelashes as a joke.

Nigel didn’t know who this Robert Downey Jr. was, but he was suddenly jealous of him.

They began dancing, silly and uncaring, each song an upbeat bop. Only just moving their bodies, not judging each other for their horrible moves. Until the music slowed and all the couples were pulling each other close.

The song; _ What Would It Take _ by Anderson East began playing.

“Not exactly a good song for friends to dance to,” Will smirked, even through allowing Nigel to pull him against his body so their chests were touching.

“What do you mean?” Nigel cooed. “Friends dance to this all the time.”

Their faces fell from their joking demeanors as they got lost in the music and one another’s eyes. Nigel held Will by the small of his back as they swayed slowly to the music. His hand was playing under the flimsy top to caress Will’s soft skin over his spine. 

_ What would it take? To make you love me. _ The song sang. _ Would it take flowers? Red roses from vines? Would it take diamonds? To let you know you were mine. I’ll take you dancing. Sweep you off your feet. What do you need, to know you’re the only one, one for me? _

Nigel and Will had floated away from themselves, only focusing on one another’s touch. The look in one another’s eyes. Will’s hands were resting around the back of Nigel’s neck, his thumb gently tracing the bottom of his hair.

Will realized at that moment, this was what a relationship should feel like. Without worry. Without stress from the fear of being replaced. Will had never felt more confident, more content, than when he was with Nigel. He wanted him. He wanted _ this _. Forever.

“May I kiss you?” Nigel said, his heart pounding. His hand caressing Will’s cheek.

Will didn’t need to think. He knew what he wanted. What he needed.

He nodded, looking from Nigel’s mouth back into his eyes again.

Nigel leaned in and Will accepted his kiss, their lips colliding for the first time.

Their souls exhaled.

Their tongues and mouths move together perfectly in sync, flawlessly timed, their bodies thrummed as each chord string was plucked, creating the masterpiece that was their bodies’ music. Their mouths had been craving purchase in one another for so long. They had been like magnets always denying themselves, but had finally given in, allowing themselves to finally be one.

The music playing around them was muffled in their embrace, feeling like they were elevated higher, or lower, all they knew is they did not have their feet on the planet.

Nigel’s hand gently moved under Will’s shirt to pet and caress the soft skin with one of his hands, gripping and tugging softly on the fabric a bit, while the other was against the boy’s cheek deepening their kiss. Both of Will’s hands were on Nigel’s face feeding the man with shallow breaths, reviving him and keeping him from thinking it was all a dream.

They parted after the song was over, looking into each other’s eyes again.

Will pet his face, marveling up at him.

Nigel was shocked that such a beautiful look, full of adoration, was directed at him. By the boy he had fallen in love with. What had he done to deserve that look? He wasn’t a good man, wasn’t at all worthy.

He felt tears come to his eyes but he refused to let them fall.

“Come back to my hotel?” Nigel’s voice squeaked, nervous.

_ Please don’t run. Please don’t leave now. _

Will nodded. “Let’s go.”

* * *

Nigel had been staying in a room off of the French Quarter for the past few weeks and it was only a couple of blocks from the bar. They held hands, nuzzling against one another as they made their way there. Will kissed him, gentle little perfect pecks with his soft lips, sending Nigel over the moon.

Upon reaching his room, Nigel produced his key. Will was hanging on him, his face buried in the man’s neck. Nigel opened the door and immediately gathered Will up, hiking his body in his hold to walk him into the room. Will’s legs were wrapped around him, weightless as Nigel brought him in blindly. They had begun kissing again.

Nigel shut the door behind him and walked them both to the bed. Nigel felt the bed against the front of his thighs and set Will down on the mattress, climbing on top of him. Already missing his mouth over the course of seconds. Their kisses began to get heavier and hotter, Will’s had begun to make the breathy squeaky noises he made when he was aroused. The sounds were music to Nigel’s ears. He ground himself against Will’s thigh over his slacks, his cock hard.

They looked into each other’s eyes again and Nigel kissed his plump bottom lip in a peck before kissing the boy’s chin and beginning to move down. He held Will’s hips against the bed with his hands as he kissed down his chest until he reached his exposed naval.

Nigel licked the skin there, his tongue trailing a slow line from the boy’s belly button to the lip of his shorts. Will sighed above him, his hands finding the tops of Nigel’s to toy with and lace parts of his fingers into. Nigel took the little sunflower charm dangling there between his teeth and began gently tugging and licking. The cold wet metal against Will’s stomach made the boy whine, his hips wiggling.

“Nigel,” he sighed.

It had been so long since Nigel had heard Will speak his name like that.

He snaked his fingers into Will’s dance shorts and began lowering them down his body. He groaned, his face resting in the corner of Will’s inner thigh when he saw what the boy had on underneath them. Yellow and white checkered panties. The front fully paneled, the back was a thong style. A thin line of lace at the top and around Will’s inner legs. Nigel kissed his thigh, marveling down at the beautiful boy’s body.

“You went all out today, hm? Really all-matching.”

Will tugged on his bottom lip with his teeth. “Wasn’t sure we’d get this far, but I was prepared.” He winked.

Nigel groaned again before going to lave and kiss Will through his panties, alternating between wetting the fabric and toying with the little charm with his lips until Will was a whimpering mess.

“Please,” he whined.

“What do you want, baby?” Nigel kissed his stomach, nuzzling there with his forehead. Holding the boy like he was everything precious to him.

Will carded his fingers through Nigel’s grey-peppered hair. “Want you inside me. Please?”

Nigel moved up to join their lips again. They kissed again for a while as Nigel manipulated their bodies, picking him up and moving them further up the bed. He pulled away for a moment to reach into the bedside table drawer to produce a condom and a small bottle of lube.

Will had begun kissing Nigel’s lower stomach under his shirt as he reached. “Eager little thing,” he chuckled.

“Like you haven’t missed this?” Will said.

“Every fucking day,” Nigel said. “Every day.”

Will unbuckled Nigel’s pants and tugged them along with his underwear down and took the man into his mouth. Drooling and stroking him with his mouth and hand. Nigel’s hips jolted forward, and he moaned.

“Babe, stop. Not gonna last.”

Will pulled back with a pout on his lips. “C’mere,” Nigel sat himself up against the headboard and beckoned the boy to straddle him. “C’mere, baby.” He said again, holding his hand. 

Nigel rid himself of his and Will’s shirts and Will’s dampened panties before the boy straddled him. He accepted the boy’s chest against his own as they kissed again. Nigel blindly found the bottle of lube he had gotten out and wet his fingers, reaching behind Will to begin rubbing his fingers against the boy’s warm hole. 

Will pressed back against his digits silently as his mouth retired to Nigel’s neck, finally kissing his tattoo and tracing it with his tongue. Something he had been fantasizing about for months. He smelled like smoke there too. Nigel touched him so gently, Will felt like he could cry at any moment.

Nigel pressed in with a heavily lubricated finger and Will keened, rolling his hips forward. Nigel pressed another in easily and began moving them in and out. The act was almost not-necessary, but Nigel wanted to take his time, teasing him. Wanted to draw it all out, hear every possible sound, every single gentle hitch of the boy’s voice went straight to his cock.

“More,” Will whined, clutching the man’s shoulders. “More, please?”

Their lips joined again as Nigel worked behind him, rolling the condom down onto himself and lining up. He had been inside of Will only twice before, but never like this. Nigel wasn’t sure how long he would be able to last. The boy was his everything, now.

Will exhaled a shaky whiny breath as Nigel slid into him slowly. He clung to the back of Nigel’s neck and breathed warm against his lips. “That’s it,” Nigel cooed. “Take me all the way.”

Will’s thighs trembled on either side of the man’s, the charm dangling from his naval hit against Nigel’s stomach a few times.

Their lips moved together as Nigel eased him down onto him, holding his hips. By the time he was fully inside and Will was flush against his lap they both sighed into one another’s mouth in unison. Will began rolling his hips, bouncing gently up and down. The thin bedsheet was around the lower half of their bodies, the light from the moon outside the window was the only source they had.

“Fuck,” Nigel sighed, holding the boy’s hips, feeling his body tense and relax, taking him all the way.

They pulled back and looked into one another’s eyes in the darkness, the moon casting half a shadow across them. Will’s lower lip trembled, Nigel traced it with his thumb, slipping it in between the boy’s lips. Will sucked on it, not looking away from the man for a moment before Nigel was pulling the boy in again.

“When I’m with someone else, I think of you,” Will said against his mouth. ”I’ve only thought of you. For so long.”

This was a dream, it had to have been a dream.

Nigel had no place in that beautiful mind. He didn’t belong.

“Baby,” he sighed, kissing him again. 

“I’m close,” Will whimpered against his mouth, clutching at Nigel’s biceps. He continued to roll his hips and angle himself to hit that spot inside him again and again. Nigel had been on the edge since he had begun to slide in. They had both wanted it to last longer.

“That’s okay,” Nigel pet the boy’s hair. “Let go.” He pecked his lips.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed.

Nigel shushed him softly, the sound taking ten seconds to fully exhale.

“Do what feels good,” he kissed him, his nails gently raking his hips. “I’m right here.”

Will clutched Nigel arms and shivered, tears rolling down his cheeks. He trembled and Nigel held him close as he came, driving Nigel over the edge at the same time. Their mouths feeding one another their sighs and sounds of ecstasy. They kissed and held one another, tensing up and then relaxing, drifting down, clinging to one another. Afraid one of them might float away.

Will continued trembling in Nigel’s arms as the man kissed his forehead, smoothing the sweaty hair back from his face. He didn’t want to let go. Ever. He belonged there. He would be content in it all ending at that moment if he got to experience that for all of eternity.

* * *

It took a few moments for Nigel to get his bearings before he was reaching for his phone to set an alarm a few hours in the future for them to wake up, so Will could meet with Randall. So he could go home.

Will had already fallen asleep against Nigel’s body, and the man had to gently wake him up so he could shift their bodies to a more comfortable position. They laid down next to one another. Will on his stomach, immediately back asleep again as soon as his head hit the pillow. Nigel took the sunflower clip out of the boy’s hair and put it on the bedside table for safekeeping and kissed his forehead and wrapped his body around Will’s before drifting off himself. Wanting to cherish the next couple of hours he had with the boy.

It wasn’t his alarm that woke Nigel up a couple of hours later but the continuous music coming from the bar down the street. The song _ Come Away With Me _ by Nora Jones was playing there, the music low and far away but still clear enough so Nigel could hear every word through the walls.

Nigel lay watching Will sleep for a few moments, running his fingers through the boy’s hair. Wondering what he had done to earn the boy’s affections.

He kissed Will’s bare shoulder a few times and nuzzled there. He didn’t realize Will was waking up, his eyes flickering open until he pulled back.

“Hey,” Will said, smiling sleepily.

Nigel smiled. “Hey.”

Their lips joined again, so gently it didn’t make a sound.

He took a deep breath before he said what was on his mind, not thinking about the consequences.

“Stay with me,” he said, his voice breaking in the middle.

Will nuzzled his face against the pillow, his eyes sparklingly in the moonlight. He smiled, his lip twitching.

“Okay.”

Nigel’s inhaled, his heart fluttering. He had not expected that.

“Will you? Stay with me?” He pet Will’s cheek with the back of his hand.

Will nodded. He saw his future with Nigel, nobody else. This was where he was meant to end up all along.

They kissed, Nigel cried into their embrace. A broken sob. Will shushed it away, kissing his lips.

“Are you mine?” Nigel pet his face again with both hands, holding, unable to believe it was true.

Will nodded. “I’m yours.”

They kissed again for a while until Nigel’s real alarm was going off, jolting them out of their floaty stupor.

“I do need to go back,” Will said. Nigel’s heart plummeted at those words before Will finished his sentence. “Just for tonight. Get my money, all my things. Break the news. I’ll have Randall drive me back here tomorrow.”

Nigel shook his head. “I should go with you.”

“No. No. I need to explain it to him on my own. If you’re there he will just get angry. I’m sure…positive… he was getting sick of my jealousy. He will be glad to be rid of me.”

Nigel shook his head. “No. I’m going with you. What if he tries to hurt you?”

“He won't,” Will pet Nigel’s face with his thumbs. He’s not like that. He told me last week, if I didn’t want to be there anymore I didn’t have to be. He’s never said I wasn’t free to go.”

“Are you sure you _ want _ to go?” Nigel still felt like he was floating in a dream, in a world far too good to be real life.

Will kissed Nigel again. “I have never been surer of anything. I was miserable there. Things used to be so much different, but they changed. Hannibal broke his promises. I was staying only because I was scared, of losing the roof over my head. The love has been gone for a long time.” He nodded, his voice breaking in his live confession, hitting himself hard. Realizing it all at that moment as he spoke aloud. “I realized when I would kiss him, there at the end, it was always with you in my head. I tried, so hard, to rid you from my mind so I could focus on him and I couldn’t… I couldn’t…”

“Will,” Nigel sighed.

They kissed.

“Let me go end this?” Will said. “I’ll be back in the morning. Okay?”

Nigel didn’t want to let Will out of his sight, but damn was the boy stubborn.

He conceded. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the last chapter before shit gets real. Please prepare yourselves <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter involves physical abuse as well as extensive mental abuse. Please read with caution and safety.

“These things,” Nigel chuckled picking up Will’s discarded panties from the sheets. He groaned. “These things almost killed me when I saw them.”

Will, still lying down, stretched out naked in the bundles of blankets watching Nigel get dressed, laughed. “I picked them out just for you.”

Nigel tossed the panties to Will who caught them and sat up to put them back on. Nigel buckled his pants and leaned over the bed to kiss Will again, full of tongue. Will tugged on his shoulders. “Wish we had time for round two,” Will whispered.

“Fuck, me too,” they rest their foreheads together. “I could never get tired of this.” He kissed his lips in a peck. They looked into each other’s eyes. Nigel pet Will’s cheek. “Knowing you’re mine. Kissing you. Fucking finally,” he chuckled.

Their lips joined again.

“We’ll have plenty of time for that later,” Nigel said. “When you’re back here.” He held the boy’s face, pausing again. “You’re sure you want to do this?”

Will nodded, his eyes sparkling up at Nigel. “Quit doubting my love for you.”

“Love?”

Nigel felt like he had taken a diving leap from a plane, hearing the word.

Will smiled. He tugged on his own bottom lip with his teeth, a cute little smirk on his face. He nodded again. “You heard me.”

Nigel kissed Will, crawling fully on top of him again. He floated away from his body for a moment, unable to fathom the fact that this boy gave him the time of day, much less had such strong feelings for him.

“Leave with me right now,” Nigel said against Will’s lips. “I’ll take care of you. You don’t need to go get your money. You don’t need it with me.”

Will held Nigel’s cheek. He wished he could avoid going back to Desert Rose, wished he could gloss over telling Hannibal it was all over. Just leave without a goodbye. He wished he could leave his money, but he couldn’t. He had earned that money, it was his. It was the only thing in the world that Will was _ sure _ was his. He had worked hard over the past year. He would need it as a backup in case anything happened. It was for his peace of mind. Will knew Nigel cared for him, but he couldn’t take any chances. Will needed a backup, and that money was his security. He couldn’t say that though, without offending Nigel.

“Everything will be okay,” Will kissed Nigel’s lips in a soft little peck. “I promise.”

* * *

They got dressed and headed for Will’s pick-up spot, holding hands and kissing every few moments. Will checked the time on his phone as soon as they reached the spot Randall had dropped him off at nearly twelve hours earlier. It was five past midnight.

“He’s late,” Will sighed. “He’s never late.”

He called Randall’s phone and nobody picked up.

_ …Hey this is Randall, thanks for calling but I’m not… _

Will dialed the number again. Same story.

“He doesn’t ever not answer the phone,” Will laughed nervously, calling the number again to the same result.

“Maybe he fell asleep studying?” Nigel suggested.

“Yeah, maybe…I need to get back there tonight. If I don’t come back it’ll make it all so much worse.”

“I can drive you,” Nigel said. He didn’t want Will out of his sight. Especially for such a potentially risky task. But Will insisted Hannibal wouldn’t do anything and Nigel didn’t want to come off as overbearing. Such tendencies were what killed his past relationships.

“No,” Will said, shaking his head. “No.”

Nigel sighed. “I’ll call you an Uber,” he was already opening his phone to the app before Will could say no.

In moments a silver Toyota was pulling up.

“Will?” The driver, a kind-looking woman, said.

“Yeah that’s me,” Will said with a polite smile.

Nigel opened the back door for the boy to get in.

Will placed one foot into the backseat and turned around. He took off his new sunflower bracelet and handed it to Nigel for safekeeping. “I want that back.” He winked.

Nigel leaned in and kissed Will one last time, holding him by his lower back. Will sighed against Nigel’s mouth. “I’m coming home to you.”

Nigel smirked. “You bet your ass you are.”

They both smiled and pecked another kiss.

Nigel stood watching the car drive away until it was no longer in view.

* * *

Will felt something was missing from his soul the moment he and Nigel parted. He had turned in his seat, watching Nigel stare after the car. He had to resist the urge of opening the car door and stumbling out, running back to him, jumping into his arms and holding him and never letting go.

This all felt wrong. He shouldn’t be leaving him. He didn’t want to part from him. He shouldn’t be going back to Desert Rose alone. But he wanted to pretend everything was okay. He wanted to seem tough and like he could hold his own. He was going back to retrieve what was rightly his, and tell the man who had hurt him, the man who had stamped out his flame, that he had found someone who treated him far better and treasured him. Will was sure Hannibal would have some choice words, but he was positive the man wouldn’t hurt him.

To Will’s calculations, his earnings over the past year, not counting the house cut, was just over nine-hundred-thousand dollars. He was set for life. If God forbid, anything did happen, Will would be able to support himself and live comfortably. What he was sure of, was that he was finished feeling like an object. Finished placating and giving up everything for a man who broke his heart every single evening.

Will was finally realizing his self-worth, and he was going to fight for it.

* * *

“You can stop here,” Will instructed the driver. They were halfway down the pitch-black dirt road. Desert Rose was just around the bend, a little over half a mile away. But through-traffic was strictly forbidden. Any taxis or ride shares weren’t allowed past a certain point. The place was still very much a secret and they couldn’t have the public finding out about it.

“Are you sure, sweetheart? I can drive you to the front door. It’s spooky out here.”

“I’m sure. It’s alright, I could use a walk anyway.” Will got out. He thanked the woman for the ride and she drove back down the road headed for the highway. Will walked the rest of the way to the brothel.

Will could see the giant red neon sign through the trees the farther he walked. Once he cleared the corner and the place came into full view, excitement bubbled up inside him.

_ This is the last time I’ll ever have to be here. _

He walked up the rickety steep steps and let himself in. Everyone had gone to sleep already, it seemed. Nobody was up partying, the place was completely silent. Will walked past the bar on the way to the hallway of bedrooms. He peered into the side room and his eyes fell on the red booth in the corner. _ That’s where we met. _Will couldn’t wait to be back in Nigel’s arms.

He headed straight for he and Hannibal’s bedroom. _ No, not anymore. Hannibal’s bedroom. _

Will walked in, not sure of what to expect and saw Hannibal was in his bed asleep. Will’s heart clenched. The man did look beautiful when he was sleeping. Will remembered the days when he would come home on nights like this, to see the exact sight and immediately cuddle under the blankets and up to the man, kiss his neck and nuzzle against him. He was so, so in love. But now he only got the urge to walk back out. Back to Nigel.

Will undressed and took out his bellybutton ring, changing into a big t-shirt and shorts gathered from his bedside table. Hannibal was a heavy sleeper and didn’t stir throughout his commotion. Will got into bed careful not to wake him until he was laying as far away from the man as he could, supine and staring at the ceiling. He closed his eyes and imagined Nigel’s voice in his ear to lull himself to sleep. He fantasized about his love’s touch. He would be with him again in the morning. He just had some things to tend to first. Then, he would be truly happy.

* * *

Will woke up the next morning knowing it was his last day at Desert Rose. The excitement of being done with the place, with the other boys, with the heartache, was overwhelming. But the nerves of having to break the news came crashing down on him, dampening his jubilance.

Will turned in the bed, and just like the past few days Hannibal wasn’t there and had woken up without his typical morning displays of affection, for which Will was happy. Will didn’t want to kiss anyone that wasn’t Nigel ever again.

Will didn’t know Hannibal’s schedule for the day and hoped he hadn’t left the brothel already. He wanted to get it all of it over with.

He got up with a sleepy grunt, grabbing his phone, and walked out of the bedroom and into the hallway, not bothering to dress. Will’s navy sleep shirt fell just past his bottom, his sleep shorts peeked out just an inch past them. The brothel wouldn’t be opening for another hour, so he had nobody to impress, even though he was no longer on the menu.

Will could tell something was wrong the second he walked out of the bedroom. It was just past ten in the morning and nobody was awake, nobody was there. Typically there was a group of boys around the bar pre-gaming before the doors opened at eleven. But it was a ghost town. Desert Rose was never closed, even when it was, there was always a party going during the day. The place was a permanent home to a multitude of boys. There wasn’t a reason why nobody would be awake so late in the morning.

Will walked through the brothel looking for another living soul, but couldn’t find anyone. He came upon the bar and looked perturbed until his eyes fell on Hannibal sat in the red booth in the attached room. He was looking down at the table, not acknowledging Will’s presence.

Something felt very wrong. He looked from the front door, back to Hannibal. He could leave. Right then. He shook his head and walked into the room. He needed to end this face to face. He regretted his decision the second he saw what was spread out on the table in front of Hannibal.

All of his drawings. The arcade, the museum, everywhere Nigel had taken him over their past getaways. Will’s charcoal drawing of Nigel was in the center of the drawings. The side of the artwork was frayed. Hannibal had ripped it out of his sketchbook.

“Good morning. Did you sleep well?”

Hannibal’s voice was strangely calm. He was never a man to show much emotion, but he had no business being as level-voiced as he currently was. Not with what was laid out in front of him. He was holding back the venom in his voice. But Will could sense it was coming.

“Where is everyone?”

“Not here.”

_ Obviously. But why? _Will didn’t push it.

“What’s going on?” Will said, swallowing nervously.

“Why don’t you tell me?” Hannibal sat back in the booth. His red and grey suit stretched from the movement.

“Those are my drawings.”

“Yes, they are. Do you have something you wish to tell me?”

Will stared down at the ground, trying to will himself to speak, but was ashamed of how unable he was of expressing himself.

Hannibal picked up one of the drawings. The profile drawing of Nigel. “I love your use of shading here, dear. You’re improving.”

“Hannibal…”

“You didn’t use the card I gave you last night. Probably a good thing, since it wasn’t a card. Pretty convincing though, wasn’t it? It was a tracking device. I found it suspicious you were going out lately spending all this time with Randall. I thought I would check to see where you were and what you two were doing. I wasn’t expecting anything out of the ordinary. Then I saw you with him.”

Hannibal got up and closed the distance between he and Will’s bodies.

Will stood paralyzed, not sure what to say or do.

Hannibal had been stalking them? What all had he seen? Will was sick to his stomach.

“You…you saw us?”

Hannibal still held the drawing of Nigel in his hand. “I did.”

He handed the drawing to Will. “Tear it in half.”

Will looked down at it. Shaking his head.

“Tear it in half. If you want to stay here.” The venom finally seeped out, coating his words with it. Eating away at them like acid.

Will looked down at the drawing. The man he loved wasn’t in front of him in the flesh. Not anymore. That man was preserved in the charcoal on the paper in his hands.

“You don’t give me what I need,” Will looked up into Hannibal’s eyes, finally receiving the strength he longed to have. Seeing Nigel, even a fake rendering of him, recharged him. Tears began to fall from Will’s eyes to coat his cheeks. He had wanted forever with Hannibal. He had loved him so deeply. But he wasn’t happy. He hadn’t been happy for a long time.

He had been waiting for a happily ever after that would never come.

“He cherishes me. You treat me like I could be replaced at any moment.”

Hannibal stood listening, his face stoic, like always.

Will took a deep breath. “I want to get my money and I want to go.”

“Oh sweetheart,” Hannibal puts his hands on Will’s cheeks. Will relaxed into them. His body embarrassingly still used to responding to the man’s touch. His voice was heartbreakingly gentle. Will prepared himself for Hannibal’s apology. _ Don’t give in. Stand your ground. _ He imagined Nigel’s voice in his head for strength.

“You’ll never see that money. It never belonged to you. You were mine. Therefore all the money you made, was mine.” Will winced, his eyes shutting and more tears began streaming down his cheeks. “Go have fun on the street. That man will get tired of you soon enough and will leave you all alone in the gutter.” Hannibal moved a piece of Will’s hair behind his ear and cooed. “Aw, honey, don’t cry. That’s just what you were made for. It’s your only purpose. You’ll come crawling back to me and I will laugh in your face. You’re nothing without me. Without this place. The only reason you were even invited here…” Hannibal chuckled, remembering the memory. “Is because the clients had been requesting a fem boy for years. I saw your hideous painting that night and you seemed perfect. Young, stupid, and far too trusting.”

Will moved back out of Hannibal’s hold and shoved his hands down.

“My gender isn’t your fucking fetish!”

“Oh, it is. And it is to many men,” Hannibal smirked. “I’ll find another one just like you, no problem. Apparently, they linger around art schools. Who would’ve known?” He nodded, gesturing toward the door. “You’re free to go now.”

Will wanted to. He wanted to turn and run while he could but he pushed the subject further. Unable to hold his tongue. His need for closure was badgering him.

“You never loved me?”

Hannibal laughed. “I’ve never loved anybody. I only take from others what I can get out of them.”

“You’re lying,” Will shook his head. “You’re mad I’m leaving so you’re saying these things, but you loved me. There’s no way you didn’t.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night. Get out of my brothel.” Hannibal took up the stack of Will’s drawings, ripping the one of Nigel from the boy’s grasp and ripped them all in half, shoving the mauled stack against Will’s chest causing them to cascade to the floor. “And don’t come back. You lying cheating little whore.”

“I’m not coming back,” Will turned to leave and was halfway to the door when Hannibal spoke. “Don’t worry.”

“Give that filthy drug dealer my regards.”

Will didn’t know for sure, but he had assumed Nigel was in that kind of business. The news wasn’t shocking. But he would be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t disappointed.

Hannibal read the look on the boy’s face.

“Oh, you didn’t know that? You’re leaving me for him, love in those perfect little eyes, and you didn’t even know that? You’re far more idiotic than I could have ever imagined.”

Will whipped around.

“That _ filthy _ drug dealer is twice the man and lover than you will ever fucking be.”

Hannibal twisted the antler ring on his finger from the outside to the inside and lifted his hand, leaving a hard slap across Will’s face at full force. Will turned at the exact moment, reacting to the lightning-fast movement. The sharp platinum antler found purchase in the boy’s forehead and scraped down. Cutting a long gash across the boy’s face from the top of his head all the way diagonally across Will’s left cheek. The cut was deep and it immediately began gushing blood.

Will collapsed to the ground holding his face with his hands. In seconds they were coated in crimson. He screamed and began to sob, huddled on the ground.

Hannibal chuckled at the sight, circling him. “Good luck on the street corner. It is all you’re good at. That’s where you will eventually end up. Though that scar on your cheek will take your value down drastically. Nobody wants you. Especially now. That _ man _, if you can call him that, will get tired of you. All he wanted was your looks. Now you don’t even have that.”

Hannibal turned on his heel and left down the hallway.

Will tried opening his left eye to check that it was still intact. It was. But the movement caused the blood from his forehead to pour into his socket, stinging him. He screamed closing his eye tight again. He stumbled to the bar grabbing paper towels to stanch the blood, holding pressure against his face. He saw the blood on his own hands and began to feel woozy. He had never gotten light-headed from seeing blood, except for when it was his own.

He found his phone, dropped on the floor, and dialed Randall. The call went straight to voicemail. He tried again. And for a third time. “Please,” he sobbed, clutching the phone. He didn’t want to call Nigel. He didn’t want him to see him like that. He didn’t want to risk Nigel coming and getting into it with Hannibal. Didn’t want him to get hurt.

And what if Hannibal was right? What if Nigel saw him and decided he was ugly now and he didn’t want him. What would he look like when his face healed? Will began to cry even harder at that. He never could have fathomed Hannibal would hit him, or hurt him in the slightest. Had everything over the past year been a lie? How could he have been so stupid?

Will tucked his phone into his shorts and grabbed more towels. He could only see from his right eye as he stumbled out of the doors to the outside. Holding the railing he made his way down, almost losing his footing multiple times from his lack of sight. He made it and began his trek down the dirt road. He was going to call Nigel, but he needed to get far enough down the road so when Nigel did find him he could convince him to drive the other way. If he was too close to the brothel Nigel would want to go and fight Hannibal and he would end up hurt too. He was doing it for his love, even if Nigel might leave him after seeing his face. He didn’t want anything to happen to that man.

That man who was so precious to him.

_ I’m worthless now. I’ve ruined my body. My virtue. And for what? My money is gone. He never loved me. Nigel probably doesn’t either. Not really. Once he sees me… Once people get to know me they leave. They always leave. I was a pretty face and now I’m not even that. _

Will continued to sob and his face continued to gush blood. Will stumbled over his feet, almost toppling over multiple times. His vision was blurring. He got nauseous and emptied his stomach in the side of the street near the woods and kept walking. He felt his mind going, about to lose consciousness.

He decided it was now or never. He was far enough down the road, he thought.

He called Nigel, dreading having to tell him what happened. Scared he would be mad at him for insisting he go alone. Scared he will hear about his face and not come.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Will broke down into the receiver the second he heard his voice.

“Nigel.”

“Baby?” Nigel’s voice was frantic. “Babe?”

“Ni…” Will collapsed onto the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don’t hate me.


	13. Chapter 13

Nigel blew smoke out from between his lips, holding a half-used cigarette in his dominant hand as he looked out over the French Quarter from his balcony over the water, watching the sunrise. Pink, green, orange, the colors bled together painting an otherworldly image in the sky. Nigel wished Will was there to see it and experience it with him.

He imagined the boy in his arms resting his head against his chest as they watched the new day begin as one. Their first morning of being out about their love for one another. They should have been together. But instead, Will was elsewhere, in that…place.

Nigel scowled flicking the bud of his cigarette, ashing it into the tray he had balanced on the railing. Nigel would have kissed Will’s lips and held him tight. Commented on how beautiful Will’s eyes looked in the light of the rising sun. Will’s body fit so perfectly inside his. Folded into him. Like he was made for him. So much undeserved trust in those bones.

Nigel missed him, and they had only been apart for six hours.

He hadn’t slept all night. For multiple reasons.

Firstly, he was still high on what had happened between he and Will. They had kissed for the first time. Will wanted him, and only him. Not only that, but the boy had expressed that he wanted to be _ with _ him, and the boy apparently…loved him?

Surely, it had all been a dream. A sick twisted fabrication of his mind to keep Nigel placated and hoping for more. But Nigel could still feel a ghost of the boy’s lips against his, could still feel the raking of the boy’s nails against his back as they had made love. It had been real. Nigel couldn’t go a full minute without replaying their first kiss in his head. How the boy had melted so comfortably in his arms. How the disgustingly cliché fireworks had sounded off behind his eyelids, leaving sparks of electricity humming in his brain for minutes afterward. Nigel’s every daydream was about the boy and had been for months. Save a few weeks where he felt forced to forget him. Will was always his main fantasy. Such wouldn’t be ending any time soon.

Secondly, Nigel was worried sick for the boy’s safety. For him going back to that God awful cesspool of a place, to speak to that abhorrent neglectful pretentious fucking asshole. Will had sworn nothing bad would happen and Nigel wanted to believe that. He wanted to give Will the benefit of a doubt. Will knew Hannibal better than he did. But on the same token, Nigel had known better. Something didn’t feel right about the situation.

And thirdly, Nigel‘s past had been tormenting his mind again, bludgeoning him with all his previous life mistakes and fuck-ups. He had ruined his past relationships, his most recent stinging the absolute worst. He was still fishing thin figurative slivers of glass from his heart over that one, years later. He was terrified history would repeat itself and he would end up doing the same thing to Will, running him off with his compulsive controlling behaviors and problems with controlling his anger.

Which was why Nigel had allowed Will to go back to Desert Rose alone. He was practicing letting go, not being such a control freak. But he was realizing in those early morning hours, that he had been too lenient, too ignorant, too trusting. It was not the time. Not with something so dire or potentially dangerous. He should’ve been there to protect Will and that thought had been digging at Nigel nonstop since the Uber carrying the man he loved had driven off.

All of those were reasons enough, but Nigel was waiting impatiently for Will’s call to pick him at some point that morning and he couldn’t sleep in case he missed it. Because when the boy called, Nigel would be going to him. He would spend the rest of his life _ going _ to him.

Nigel allowed himself to get breakfast, keeping his phone close by waiting for some news or call to action. He sat at the café for hours scrolling his phone, every few moments opening his gallery, again and again, to look at the selfie Will had taken of himself months prior with his device. He couldn’t wait to get his hands on the boy again and show him what it felt like to be truly, deeply, and genuinely loved. He ended up setting the selfie as his new background so he could see it every time he locked his phone. He wondered if Will would ever be down for taking a picture together.

His mind got to wandering again.

_ Maybe he _ was _ right. Maybe nothing will happen. Maybe, just maybe, this is all in my fucking head and Hannibal was just as Will had said, selfish and glad to be rid of him. _

Nigel couldn’t imagine how Hannibal was able to treat Will in such a way. Since he had first met the boy he had been enamored with him. How was Hannibal so nonchalant, uncaring of who touched the boy he apparently loved. Will was no object, and it infuriated Nigel seeing him being treated as such. Will was such a talented, gorgeous, kind-hearted person. Nigel couldn’t fathom someone not cherishing him and loving him every moment, as if it were their last.

Just then, Nigel’s phone began to ring. It was a few minutes past ten in the morning. He answered immediately.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Nigel knew whatever had ended up happening between Hannibal and Will, Will would be emotional. But the sound Will replied with wasn’t a sound of pure upset but one of distress, pain, and anguish. Nigel’s stomach plummeted, horrified of the sounds his love had made.

Will wailed a broken sob into the receiver and Nigel could just barely make out his own name.

“Baby?” Nigel’s voice raised, panicked. Something wasn’t right. “Babe?”

Will sighed the beginning of his name again and Nigel heard a heavy thud and a crackling sound as the phone slid across what sounded like gravel.

“Baby!” Nigel screamed into the receiver rushing out of the café en route to the hotel to fetch his car and his gun. 

* * *

Nigel sped down the freeway, dodging traffic, focused on the road and trying to get to Desert Rose as fast as possible. The brothel was a little under an hour away but Nigel was breaking every speeding rule he could, needing to get to him. How could he have been so fucking stupid? He never should’ve let him go alone. He hit his steering wheel with a scream, bruising the heel of his hand. _ Fuck fuck fuck. Baby…Will…God, please. _ He was imagining the worst. Had Hannibal maimed him beyond healing? Was he dead? He cried, hot tears poured down his cheeks past his teeth grit with a maelstrom of anger, fear, and guilt. _ Please don’t be dead. Please don’t. _ It was all his fault. He shouldn’t have listened to Will. He should have gone with him. _ God dammit! _He huffed a broken sob.

He wiped the tears away and exited the freeway and headed down the all too familiar dirt road he hadn’t traveled down in months. He was halfway down the road when he saw a figure in the street. He slammed on his breaks, thirty feet in front of the anomaly and scrambled out of the car and began running.

The first thing Nigel saw was the blood. His stomach was in knots. Will wasn’t moving, lying face down against the gravel and dirt road, a small pool of crimson had stained the ground. Nigel let out a strangled cry. “Will?”

He got to his knees and hoisted the boy up and into his arms to survey the damage, cradling him against his body. “Oh my god,” he moved Will’s long hair, sticky with blood, away from his face. There was so much blood and dirt on his face it was difficult for Nigel to make out the injury and the precise location of the wound. Nigel was relieved to see Will’s chest moving but with a two-finger press against the boy’s neck, Nigel found Will’s heart rate was low.

Nigel wanted to break down. Wanted to lose control and fall apart. But it wasn’t the time. Will needed him to be strong.

“Honey?” Nigel cooed, his voice breaking on the last syllable. “Baby, wake up.” He shook the boy gently.

Will eyes moved beneath his lids before his body jolted a bit, a reflex of surprise. His right eye opened a tiny amount. His left eye was covered in blood gluing it mostly shut.

“Oh, thank God,” Nigel sighed. “Fuck. Will, you’re going to be okay. Can you hear me?”

Will’s hand slowly rose to lay over Nigel’s, on his chest. He didn’t have any strength to grip, he just laid his palm there. His head tilted down in such a small movement Nigel almost missed it.

“You’re going to be okay. It’s all going to be okay. Did he do this? What did he do to you?”

Nigel knew the answer already, looking away from Will to look down the road toward the brothel, a look of pure unadulterated rage on his face. _ I’m going to fucking kill him. _He could put Will in his back seat, run, be there in less than a minute and blow the man’s fucking head off. He wouldn’t see him coming.

“No,” Will breathed out. His voice soft and shaky. His vision was hazy and partially obstructed but he could see the look on Nigel’s face as if reading his thoughts. “No,” he repeated, starting to cry again, wincing at the pain. “Don’t. Please. I don’t want you to get hurt. Let’s go. Please?”

“I can’t let him get away with this shit…”

“I can’t lose you,” Will sobbed, mustering his strength to weakly squeeze Nigel’s hand. “Please…”

_ You won’t lose me, my love. I will win. _ Nigel wanted to defy Will and do it anyway. He could have it all over in moments. But the look in Will’s eyes and the desperation in his voice rooted him to the spot. He couldn’t abandon him, even for a moment. Not when he was injured and oh so fragile, desperately in need of being cleaned up and taken care of. Will passed out again. Nigel considered it once more before giving in. He needed to listen to Will. Swallow his pride and concede. For the time being, anyway.

Nigel nodded. Angry with himself but knowing it was the right decision. He lifted the boy up and carried him to the car.

* * *

Will woke to the sound of sloshing water. He kept his eyes closed, taking in his sense of feeling, still fading in and out of consciousness. He was on a bed, a soft pillow was under his head and it was wrapped in a towel. He faded out and back in again when he felt a wet washcloth being dabbed gently on his face. He winced, whining and turning away from it.

Will heard a voice shushing him softly, and the cloth was back. He stayed still allowing it to pet at and clean his wound. He opened his eyes a bit as he looked up at Nigel, a look of adoration and concentration on his handsome and concerned face.

“How’d I get here?”

Nigel shushed him again, dabbing the towel back in the basin of water he had balanced on the nightstand before bringing it back to clean the cut. We can talk later, honey. You’re safe. Go back to sleep.”

Will nodded with a soft little content grunt and closed his eyes again, drifting back off. Knowing if he was going to be safe with anyone, it would be with Nigel.

* * *

Nigel gave thanks to a God he didn’t particularly believe in when he discovered Will’s injury wasn’t nearly as bad as he had anticipated. It was a cut, starting from the side of his forehead and traveled down his left cheek, missing his eye by centimeters and scraping down past his nose and dying right before the top of his lip. It was deep, but not wide or serious enough for stitches. With proper bandaging and medicine, it would heal just fine. Will would most likely be left with a scar, but it wasn’t anything that would detract from the boy’s beauty. Nothing, in Nigel’s opinion, ever could.

He had cleaned Will’s face with the cloth and applied alcohol and then a thick layer of gauze and medical tape. They were materials he always carried with him, in case things in his profession turned hairy. Which they had done in the past, so he always learned to be prepared.

Nigel kept Will in the clothes in whence he found him in. A big cotton t-shirt and shorts. They weren’t that dirty from being in the street but there were flecks of blood on the shirt. And the front of Will’s hair was still matted with blood. Nigel had considered changing him and he tried getting the blood out with his wet towel but he quickly came to the conclusion it would cause Will too much disturbance. Nigel didn’t want to bother Will or risk waking him up or putting him through any more pain. He had surveyed every inch of Will’s body underneath his clothing, moving them aside to check that his sole injury was the one on his face, and he was thankful when it was.

It was only about noon, but Nigel was exhausted, having been up all night. He knew he should sleep, blackout the room with the thick curtains and lay down next to Will and doze off. He knew he should stay with him, in case he woke up. But every molecule of his body was telling him to leave, go to Desert Rose, and kill Hannibal.

_ Will would never find out. I could be back in a couple of hours. _

Nigel found himself thinking as he lay on the pillow staring at Will’s peacefully sleeping frame. He fantasized about driving to the brothel, finding Hannibal and cutting his face exactly how he had cut Will’s before slitting his neck. Maybe forcing him to his knees and making him apologize before putting a bullet between his eyes.

Nobody deserved the treatment Will had received. What kind of sick fuck would do that to someone? Nigel found himself staring at his keys, every possible image of Hannibal’s dead body maimed in hundreds of different ways flickered through his mind. He could do it. He could be fast. Nobody would ever know. He was experienced by his past. He could definitely get away with it.

He was moving to get up from the bed when he felt a hand touch his. He whipped around and saw Will with his eyes still shut, touching his thumb against the top of his hand in a weak movement. He couldn’t leave him. If he woke up and was alone he would be so scared.

Nigel laid back down and laced his fingers with Will’s. Will replied with a gentle squeeze in his sleep. Nigel kissed Will’s hand laced in his and rest his head inches from the boy’s and closed his eyes before drifting off.

Will was more important than his compulsion for revenge.

* * *

When Will woke again it was dark outside. It took a moment for him to find his bearings and figure out where he was and piece together all that had happened. He saw Hannibal’s face in his mind, stoic but his eyes seething with malice before he had struck him. He remembered the taste of the blood in his mouth, the uncaring demeanor of the man who was his first love as he had walked away, leaving him to bleed and cry alone.

Will shook his head trying to rid the memory from his mind and he began to cry, gritting his teeth behind his lips as the tears poured from his eyes, wetting the gauze taped to his face. How could he have been so stupid? He pat it gently, realizing he had been bandaged and he turned to see Nigel lying next to him asleep.

Will was overcome with guilt. It wasn’t Nigel’s responsibility to take care of him or come to his rescue. That surely wasn’t what he signed up for. Will knew he shouldn’t have gone back to Desert Rose. He should have listened and taken the loss and stayed safe with him. Now he was paying the price. Being humiliated by having to be rescued, like some kind of pathetic damsel and being scarred for life.

He considered for a moment getting up and leaving before Nigel could wake up. But where would he go? He didn’t have anywhere to call home, no haven, no money, no friends. All he knew was that he didn’t want to face what would surely happen when Nigel awoke.

Rejection.

And he would most likely lecture him like his father had done every time he did something wrong. A good ole line of ‘I told you so’ was his father’s favorite set of words and some of the only ones he took the time away from drinking to speak to Will. His father had only cared to speak to him only when the demeaning came easy and Will became a punching bag with his father’s words as the figurative fists. He didn’t know any different. Any better.

He let out a choked sob that woke Nigel from his slumber. He sleepily opened his eyes and he scooted closer to Will. He moved some of Will’s hair, still matted with blood from his face. “Hey. It’s okay.”

“I’m sorry,” Will cried. “I shouldn’t have gone back. I’m so…”

Nigel shushed him. “You didn’t do anything. It’s okay now.”

“I feel so stupid,” Will said. “I didn’t think he would…God…” he covered his face with his hands and began to weep.

Nigel immediately pulled Will against him and pet his hair, kissing the side of his head and shushed him.

He held him that entire time, letting Will cry himself out while Nigel continued with his string of, “You’re safe”, “it’s okay,” and “I’m not going anywhere.”

Will clung to him, his body wracking with sobs as he tried to calm down, but every strong emotion was washing over him like a violent rolling of tsunami-height waves, crashing into him and keeping him from breaking through the surface. Nigel was his lifesaver, trying to coax him up and out, while also allowing him all the time he needed to get out his emotions.

He was there to help him and be there for Will with whatever he needed. And right then, he needed someone to hold him and assure him everything would be okay. It was the complete opposite of how he assumed Nigel would react and his heart was soaring. He didn’t think himself worthy of such gentleness. 

Nigel began to cry too, wiping his eyes against Will’s hair, unable to fathom how someone could damage such a beautiful creature. It was akin to taking a pure white pigeon that never hurt a soul and tearing its wings off in a sickening act of power and dominance.

Nigel didn’t know what had happened, and wouldn’t ask unless Will supplied the information himself. But whatever had occurred, it was awful, and Nigel found his mind drifting back into wanted to kill Hannibal, punish him for all he had done. He didn’t think a day would go by in his life without thinking of killing that man.

After a while, Will’s cries got softer and he stopped shaking. His body relaxed into Nigel’s and Will nuzzled into his neck.

“Can we go?” Will whispered.

“Go where, baby?”

“Just wanna go. Wanna leave this place. This state. I don’t want to be here.”

Nigel nodded. “Of course, honey. When you’re better rested and healed, we will go. There are things I need to finish up in this city before we can leave, though. Is that okay?”

Will nodded, understanding. “For your job?”

Nigel nodded. “But whenever this is all finished, the second it is, I’ll take you anywhere you want to go. Okay?” He pet Will’s uninjured cheek with his thumb.

“Okay.”

Nigel took a deep breath before speaking again, terrified of what Will’s reaction would be.

“I know now probably isn’t the best time to say this…”

“Go ahead,” Will urged, petting Nigel’s face with his palm. “Give me something else to focus on. Please.” 

“Will, you’re all I want. I want to start a new life after all of this. And I want you by my side. If you’ll have me?” Nigel’s voice broke at the end. Looking into Will’s eyes always made him weak. 

Will sat trying to process everything. He wasn’t angry with him. Wasn’t saying any ‘i-told-you-so’s’. Nothing had changed. Nigel was still looking at him like he was made of gold or some other kind of precious metal. He could never get tired of being looked at that way. Slowly he began to nod, a small smile tugging at his lips. “I would love that.”

“Really?” Nigel sighed.

Will leaned in to leave a soft lingering peck against Nigel’s lips. They both rest their heads on the same pillow inches from one another. Nigel kissed away Will’s tears left on his cheeks and wiped the rest off with his thumb. They silently enjoyed each other’s company for a few minutes, relaxing in their intimate moment before Will spoke again.

“How long until you’re finished with everything here?”

“Three weeks, maybe four?”

Will nodded. “So would I stay in the hotel while you go out, or?”

“I could drive you somewhere else if you want me to? A different state? Put you up somewhere nice. Somewhere secure. So I don’t have to leave you here alone. And I’ll come get you after I’m all finished?”

Will shook his head. “I don’t want to leave you.”

“I want you to feel safe.”

Will caressed the back of his hand against Nigel’s cheek. “I feel safest here.”

“But I won't be here during the day sometimes, honey.”

“I know.”

“Is he…is he going to try to come looking for you?”

Will shook his head, his lip quivering again. “I don’t think so. Just, please don’t make me leave.” He began crying again.

Nigel shushed him. “Hey, hey. I don’t want you to go. I’m just throwing around ideas. I just want you to be protected. It’s whatever you want, baby. Whatever you want.” Nigel pulled him in and held him again.

“I’m right here,” he whispered into Will’s ear. “I’ll always be right here.”

Will clung to Nigel’s back and breathed in the man’s scent. With Nigel was where he felt the most safe, the most loved, and he didn’t want to leave him. Ever. They laid together for a full hour in silence, their love language spoke for them. Gentle caresses over skin, kisses on necks and shoulders. It was heaven.

Finally, Will spoke again. Bringing up the most important thing on his mind.

“Will I…will I be ugly when my face heals?”

“Baby, you could never be ugly.”

“Is it deep?”

“Not deep enough for stitches. It bled like crazy and it’ll be a scar, that’s for sure. But no, baby, you will never be ugly. You’re gorgeous, and I’ll tell you a hundred times a day if I have to.”

“But that’s because you love me? Right?”

“So fucking much,” Nigel said, kissing his lips. They rest their foreheads together.

“But meeting new people. They won’t see my beauty. That’s all I ever had going for me. Now it’s gone.”

Nigel was shocked. Did this boy. This beautiful boy, as talented, and kind, and wonderful as he was, really equate his worth to his looks and looks alone? How did such a phenomenal creature lack confidence?

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Nigel whispered, running his fingers through the part of Will’s hair that was clean. “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

“How is that?”

“God, you’re…” Nigel shook his head at a loss for words. There weren’t enough. “You’re everything, baby. You have it all. I look at you and the world fucking stops. My world stopped moving the second I first looked into your eyes.”

Will chuckled, his first genuine smile since the evening prior.

“I know how fucking corny that sounds. I do.”

“It is corny. But I like it,” Will said, caressing Nigel’s face again. “I really like it.”

Nigel turned to gather something from his bedside table and produced the sunflower bracelet he had bought Will the day before. “I believe this belongs to you.”

Will held his wrist up as Nigel clasped it on, lingering there for a moment after it was on to kiss Will’s wrist over his pulse point. He nuzzled there and kissed again.

Will lay staring at Nigel, trying to figure out what he had done to make Nigel love him so deeply. How had the man fallen in love with his soul over his face? Such a kind man. Will didn’t deserve such a thing. Not after everything he had done. All the depraved things he had put his body through in the pursuit of money and pleasing a man who never cared about him.

He was stable for the time being, but he knew the next few days would be an emotional rollercoaster that would send him for a loop. He prayed Nigel wouldn’t turn away from him, annoyed.

Nigel spoke on the exact subject as if reading Will’s thoughts.

“You’ve just been through something traumatic, baby. I can’t fathom. Your emotions are allowed to fluctuate right now. You’re allowed to feel any way you need to feel. And that’s what I’m here for. For you to talk to me, for me to just listen, or for me to just hold you.” He looked into Will’s blue eyes, tears beginning to pool in his own hazel ones. “I don’t ever want you to feel like you can’t ask me for anything.”

Will nodded, overwhelmed by his love’s words. He leaned in to kiss Nigel again, trying to deepen the embrace but winced at the pain it caused. The bottom of the cut was a mere inch above his lip and the movement tugged at the flesh.

“Let’s wait until you’re more healed to do that, hmm?” Nigel noticed Will’s discomfort.

Will nodded in defeat. He wanted to be close to the man and not being able to was difficult.

Nigel was so beautiful, so kind, and was everything Will had ever wanted. He accepted him, loved him, and treated him like he was a precious gem that should be treasured. He was unlike anyone Will had ever known in his life.

He wasn’t selfish like Matthew had been, he didn’t keep him around to ridicule as his father had, he didn’t treat him like an object like all his other clients had, and he didn’t tell him what to do or how to act, as Hannibal had. Nigel loved him for whoever he wanted to be. And for Will, that meant the world.

“I love you,” Will whispered, nuzzling his nose against Nigel’s.

Nigel closes his eyes, drinking those words in. It was the first time he had spoke them, instead of merely alluding to them. A surge of emotion rippled through him. “Baby…”

Will reached his hand and gathered Nigel’s, bringing it forward and pressing it between his legs. “Touch me, please. If I can’t…can’t properly kiss you. Please…please touch me.”

“You should rest, honey.”

Will shook his head. “Want you to touch me.” He whined.

Nigel sighed, nodding and opening his palm to give in to his boy. He pressed his hand over Will’s shorts and Will’s exhaled, reaching to wrap his arms around Nigel and duck into his neck as his hand began moving over him through the material.

“Relax, baby,” Nigel cooed, moving his hand slow but deliberate.

He stroked him a few times, kissing Will’s neck and softly talking to him, coaxing him to come.

“That’s it. Relax, honey. Give in. I’m right here.”

Will clutched the back of Nigel’s shirt as he came with a strangled cry, bucking forward and into Nigel’s unyielding hand.

“There we are,” Nigel kissed the side of Will’s head and he continued stroking, overstimulating the boy in his arms. He kissed the side of his head. “Did that feel good, my love?”

Will nodded slowly, suddenly very sleepy again, his entire body relaxed and he felt as if he were floating down into the mattress. He fell asleep, back into a peaceful state. Nigel kissed the boy’s face again before getting up to change Will out of his pants, a warm washcloth cleaning him before changing him into a pair of his own grey sweatpants that were far too big and wouldn’t have stayed on if it weren’t for the drawstring. Will’s upper half was still a mess, but he would help him bathe the next day. Until then, Will needed to get some rest.

Nigel stayed up for a while marveling at his love’s beauty in the dark before he joined him on the other side of consciousness where their minds were free of stress, and their pasts.

* * *

The next morning Will woke up to the sound of the shower going in the other room and an empty space next to him in the bed. He shifted his legs back and forth discovering the pants he was wearing. They were soft. They must’ve been Nigel’s. He remembered what they had done before he had fallen asleep and he blushed. He must’ve cleaned him up afterward. Just when Will thought Nigel couldn’t get any more thoughtful.

He sat up against the headboard with a groan and reached for Nigel’s phone to check the time. Seven-fifty in the morning. But he didn’t notice, because he was too busy looking at the background image. It was the selfie had taken of himself during Nigel’s final visit at Desert Rose. He ran his thumb over the image, not the screen. Would he ever look like that again? He touched the gauze on his face and began to feel the looming feeling of sadness and put the phone back down. Looking at it and being reminded of the past was far too painful.

He opened the bedside drawer to look for food or water or anything he could use but what he found there wasn’t anything he had expected, but he also wasn’t shocked. He reached in to grab the gun and held it in his lap, running his fingers delicately along the shaft and chamber of the revolver. It was heavier than he had expected it to be.

Will wasn’t surprised that Nigel owned a gun, and such didn’t bother him in the slightest. It fact it made him feel all the safer. He inspected the firearm for minutes, getting lost in the grooves, fascinated. He didn’t realize the bathroom door had opened and Nigel was standing in his towel until he spoke.

“Where’d you find that?” His voice wasn’t angry, simply curious and a bit cautious.

Will nodded to the drawer.

“Does it scare you?” Nigel said, walking forward to sit on the edge of the bed.

Will shook his head. “My dad had guns.”

“Do you know how to use it?”

Will shook his head again. Smiling in a way that made him wince again. “No. But I assume it’s on safety mode right now?”

“Yeah,” Nigel gently took the gun from Will. “This is how you take the safety off.” He flipped the switch at the back of the gun and flipped it back. “You try.”

They handled the gun together, very carefully as Nigel instructed him.

“It’s loaded, be careful.”

Will took the safety off and immediately put it back on.

Nigel nodded. “Good. You know how to shoot it?”

“Point and pull the trigger, I presume?”

Nigel chuckled. “Yeah. Pretty much. I’m going to leave this here for you while I’m out, okay? If someone suspicious comes. Or…” Nigel wanted to say Hannibal’s name but thought better of it. Will picked up on what he was alluding to, though. “You know what to do if he does.”

“I can shoot him?” Will chuckled.

“Self defense, my love.”

It was all a joke. Will didn’t think he could ever shoot anyone. No matter what they had done. It was a huge reason why he didn’t want to be a cop like his father. He would much rather have his weapon be a brush against a canvas. Making people feel things was his superpower. He didn’t need a piece of stainless steel to do that for him.

Will smiled. “He won’t come looking for me. Don’t worry.”

“You can’t be sure. I want you to be safe.”

“Nigel, I was nothing to him. I never was,” Will sighed deeply. “He used me. He doesn’t care enough to come after me. He doesn’t…doesn’t care.”

Nigel’s heart broke for the boy. How betrayed he must be feeling.

“Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“No.”

“Okay,” he said softly. He nodded toward Will’s dirty t-shirt. “Let me help you shower before I leave.”

“You have to go to work?”

“Sadly.” He gently took the gun from Will’s hand and lay it back on the velvet blanket in the drawer and closed it up.

Will sulked.

“C’mon,” Nigel beckoned, holding his hand out for Will to take.

* * *

Nigel helped Will to the bathroom and helped him undress and get into shower. He was still extremely weak so he sat up on the bottom of the tub as to not risk losing his footing. Nigel angled the stream of water to spray down at the boy’s naked boy while he cleaned him with a washcloth while Will relaxed with his eyes closed, keeping the gauze on his face for the time being. His hand rest over Nigel’s on the lip of the tub, squeezing and relaxing periodically. Nobody had ever bathed him before. He had never experienced such intimacy. He didn’t want it to end.

Nigel washed his hair, scrubbing the dried blood from the one section most heavily affected. After his body and hair were clean, Nigel took the bandage off and applied some alcohol to a separate washcloth to dab at it with.

“This will sting,” he warned. Will had been asleep the first time he had applied it.

Will whined when he felt the rag touch him but stayed still, wanting to get it all over with. Nigel shushed him, soothingly as he cleaned him up and reapplied a fresh piece of gauze and tape. He helped Will from the tub and back into the other room so they could both get dressed. Will chose another pair of Nigel’s sweatpants and a simple black t-shirt. He wouldn’t be going anywhere, so why not be comfortable?

Nigel dressed in a baby blue shirt with orange and brown cartoon dachshunds on it. One of his favorites. Will got a kick out of it.

“What are you wearing?” He chuckled.

Nigel looked down at himself. “What?”

“It’s…interesting.”

“It’s one of my oldest shirts, what’s wrong with it?”

“Nothing,” Will raised his hands. “It’s just. You know what? It’s _ you _ . It’s very _ you _.”

“Are you making fun of me right now?” Nigel smirked.

“Not at all,” Will hid a smile behind his hand.

“You’re a little shit, you know that?” Nigel pocketed his phone.

“Hey,” Will pouted. “I’m injured. You can’t be mean.”

“I’ll give you a pass this time,” Nigel winked and sat down on the bed to kiss Will’s forehead. “I’ll only be a few hours okay? You know where the gun is. Just in case. Get some rest.”

“I’m sick of resting.”

Nigel nodded. “I know. We’ll see the world after this is all over. Okay?”

Will smiled as much as he could. Nigel ghosted his lips over Will’s and left a small peck there, not wanting to hurt him.

“Watch some television or something. Just don’t leave the room, okay?”

Will nodded. “Okay.”

* * *

While Nigel was gone, Will was left alone to overthink.

At first, his brain was fine, not attacking him with negative thoughts, still high on Nigel’s love. But the more he sat and thought, the worse it got. He tried distracting himself with television but it didn’t work. Everything reminded him of Hannibal and what had happened.

Will knew Nigel had strong feelings for him, but he had thought the same of Hannibal too.

_ It’s only a matter of time before he’s finished with me too. _

Will thought of Hannibal. The way he used to look at him, with such adoration in his eyes. Just like Nigel does. Did Hannibal really never love him? Was he just a master manipulator? Was he even smart enough to know the difference?

If he miscalculated Hannibal’s feelings for him, he could surely do the same with Nigel. No matter what the man said to him, no matter how much he assured him he loved him and would always be there, there was a doubt in the back of his mind, no matter how minuscule. It would always be there, he feared. Because of what Hannibal had done. Because of his issues with abandonment. He still hadn’t forgiven Matthew. And now Randall.

Will searched the room for his phone. He knew he had left the brothel with it. He prayed Nigel had thought enough to bring it with him. He sighed with relief when he found it in the other bedside drawer.

He used Nigel’s charger to give it some juice before powering it up.

Once it was up and running, Will called Randall again. Each time it went to voicemail. Three times in a row. He didn’t know what he was expecting. If anything. Nigel was the only person in his life now. He wasn’t worthy of anything beyond that. He wasn’t even worthy of Nigel.

_ What is wrong with me, that everyone always wants somebody else? Am I not good enough? Why do people bring me into their lives, make promises, and drop me like it’s nothing? _

In Will’s mind, it was only a matter of time before Nigel did the same…

Will began to cry.

_ I’m not good enough. I’ll never be good enough. _

With Hannibal, he had felt secure and loved. Not a shadow of a doubt in his mind that Hannibal’s feelings for him were real. Was he really that naïve? That stupid to not see through his ploy?

_ Nigel could be pulling the same thing and I would never suspect it. _

Will hated Hannibal, for everything he had put him through. Everything he had done. For striking him. For using him. For stealing his money. For manipulating him when he was at his weakest and most vulnerable. His tears turned into those of anger and frustration, toward the man and toward himself.

He looked down and saw the cursive ‘H’ tattooed on his hand. His lip quivered looking down at it. He really thought he would be with that man forever, enough to mark his body. And Hannibal had let him, knowing the entire time how he was using Will and didn’t really love him.

Will was disgusted, furious, and weeping. Tears fell onto the ink and he ripped himself off the bed and walked into the bathroom. He avoided looking in the mirror, still having not looked into it since his injury and grabbed a clean washcloth and soap. Working quickly he wet the towel and soaped it up before beginning to scrub at the tattoo on his hand, pressing down hard and gritting his teeth through his tears as he scrubbed at his flesh. Desperate to be free of the man for good. Nauseated at the thought of the man still having a claim over his body.

_ Stupid. I was so stupid. So fucking stupid. I’m so stupid! _

He scrubbed and scrubbed, weeping and losing himself in time to the feeling of the washrag on his skin until five, ten, twenty minutes passed and his hand began to drip blood.

* * *

When Nigel got back to the hotel, he heard the boy’s cries from outside the door. He whipped it open and dropped his plastic bags of groceries before sprinting to the bathroom to find the boy scrubbing at his bleeding hand.

Nigel wrapped his arms around the boy from behind tackling him and forcing them both to the ground so he could hold him tight. He took the towel away from Will and the boy turned and clung to him. Nigel held him while he wept. He rocked Will back and forth in his arms while the boy sobbed. Nigel shushed him, petting his hair and attempting to calm him down.

Nigel looked at the boy’s hand. It wasn’t that damaged, thank God, but it was bleeding and torn and rubbed raw. The tattoo was still there under the carnage.

He began to cry himself. Feeling so lost. Not knowing what else he could do. He wished more than anything he could take all of Will’s pain for himself. Absorb it like a sponge and free the beautiful boy from what he was going through.

“It’s okay,” Nigel kissed his forehead. “Shh, it’s okay. I’m here.” 

“I’m sorry,” he cried out.

“Don’t apologize. Don’t…” Nigel choked on his words, squeezing the boy tight and rocking him. “None of this is your fault. None of it.”

He would tell Will every day that it wasn’t his fault, to combat the demons in his head. 

* * *

Two Weeks Later

Will was sketching. The only sounds in the room came from the gentle scratch of pencil against paper and the dull hum of the television in the background. Will sat cross-legged on the bed sketching Nigel using the only light provided on the bedside table. Will stared up the man, beautiful and strong, adoration blooming in his chest as he sat watching some mindless crime procedural. Will smiled to himself seeing how stiff Nigel was sitting as he sat as still as possible for the boy to properly draw him.

“You can relax, you know,” Will said with a bigger smile.

He no longer required the gauze on his face as the cut had mostly finished healing. Nigel had taken phenomenal care of the wound, cleaning it twice a day and providing ointments that would best promote speedy and near-flawless healing. He really did his research, knowing how important it was for Will to look as much like his old self as possible. He wasn’t doing it for himself. He didn’t care what Will ended up looking like. But for Will, his looks were important, so he did everything he could. And seeing Nigel staying up late into the night on his laptop looking up and researching creams and ordering them to be delivered to the hotel warmed Will’s heart. 

The spot was a scar, raised, puffy, and pink, but the swelling was going down more and more every day. And while Nigel continued to compliment him, Will still couldn’t bring himself to look in the mirror. Spending all of his time in the bed if he wasn’t exercising in the corner or drawing.

Nigel had provided Will with art supplies the day after his bathroom meltdown, giving him something to focus on. It helped. The ability to create art again gave Will something to distract his mind with, as well as a creative and emotional outlet. But Will didn’t have his glasses, which made drawing much more difficult, but it was nothing Will wasn’t used to, having lived without them for years previously.

While Nigel was out during the day, he drew. The entire time. He focused on telling his story and getting out every negative emotion he had. Multiple pages of his sketchbook were filled with extremely dark subjects, both literal and physical. A fair amount of pages were completely blacked out, which Nigel found odd, but if it was aiding Will in his recovery, who was he to judge?

Will needed to make sense of his feelings and art was the best way for him to do that. Nigel understood all too well, still not being able to fathom all that the boy had gone through. But he suggested to Will he should draw from life. To get out of his own head. It might do him some good for a night.

Nigel loosened up and turned to Will. “I don’t want to ruin your drawing.”

“You won’t,” Will assured. His hand had healed too, though the tattoo left was patchy. Will expressed wanting to get it lasered or covered up eventually, once they left the state. Nigel agreed that would probably be for the best.

Nigel was only gone a few hours a day, but when he wasn’t away for work he was with Will at the hotel. They ordered room service every single night and lay together, sometimes holding one another for hours all through the night until the sun came up. They hadn’t had sex, which was just fine with both of them. Will was still in the process of healing his soul, Nigel was happy to wait.

Will didn’t bring up what Nigel did for a living, ignoring it all. He knew whatever it was Nigel specifically did, it wasn’t any of his business. Besides Nigel had told him it would all be over soon and he would leave that life behind. Will didn’t want to risk ruining anything. Too terrified to ask or question him. He kept to himself about it, but it was eating him up inside.

He was still waiting for Nigel to decide he was too much trouble. Had too much baggage. And that he was better off without him. As much as he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from his lack of confidence seeping out. Needing validation at every possible turn. He prayed it was a phase. But Nigel never seemed annoyed when Will questioned him. Always happy to provide him with what he needed.

That night was no outlier.

Will continued drawing in silence for a while before he spoke up.

“Nigel…”

Nigel turned to him. “Hmm?”

“Why…why me?”

“What do you mean?”

Will put his pencil down, looking down ashamed. Horrified and embarrassed of himself and his compulsion for asking for validation nearly every night. 

“I mean, why me? I’m tainted. I’m…dirty. Everything I did. I was used. So much. Like a toy,” Will looked up. “How am I appealing?” He chuckled, laughing it off like it was a joke, it was anything but. It was a deflection. “You’re handsome and well off. You could have anybody. Why come to a brothel in the first place? Why show interest in me specifically? How could you possibly trust me after my past? I’m ruined. Scarred.”

Nigel turned off the television before scooting closer to Will and reaching out to hold his hand in between two of his. He pet the skin there, sighing.

“May I tell you a story? That might shed some light...on why?”

Will nodded. His heart pounding, curious of what Nigel was about to say.

“My ex-wife,” Nigel said. “She was an artist. A musician.”

“Ex-wife?” Will said under his breath before chuckling. He had no idea Nigel had been married in the past. He knew the man was bisexual, having told him that before. But never in a million years would he have thought Nigel had been married. It didn’t upset Will, only just surprised him.

Nigel nodded, smiling meekly. “I met her, well, more like…discovered her, when I was dying. Years ago.”

Will’s jaw dropped a bit and his eyebrows furrowed.

“I’m okay now, Sunflower,” Nigel said, assuring the boy. He took a deep breath and continued his story. Terrified of bringing up the past, terrified of how Will would react to knowing the details of his life. But they needed to be put onto the table. He couldn’t hide forever. Not from the man he loved.

“I was dying, literally, from a bullet wound to my stomach, in a hotel room above a café back in Romania,” he looked off at nothing reminiscing. “Anyway, I heard her play every afternoon through the floorboards. Very thin floorboards. I focused on her music instead of my injuries and her playing saved my life. I listened to it when I felt like giving up. I looked forward to it every day before she started. It really kept me going. I can still fucking remember the day, one when I was fading out and about to just…give up.”

Will put down his drawing pad and scooted forward reaching to hold Nigel’s hand. Their fingers laced together. Nigel stared down at his hand with a small smile before he continued.

“She was late to start that day. But the moment I heard the first chord. I knew it wasn’t my time. I didn’t know who the musician was for weeks. But whoever they were, it was because of them I was still alive. So, one day when I was strong enough I made my way downstairs and saw her.”

He looked off again, remembering the beautiful short-red-haired cellist. “I knew immediately that I was no good for her. And she was far too good for _ me _. But she was my angel, lifting me from perdition and toward the light. She had a white glow around her that day. I was terrified. But I mustered my courage and introduced myself to her. I told her music saved me. And instead of laughing in my face as I had so expected, she asked me to have a cup of coffee with her. We fell in love. Quickly.” He chuckled. “Very fucking quickly.”

He squeezed Will’s hand in his.

“We got married. Everything was good. Until my…” Nigel exhaled. “Until my negative impulses of jealousy fucking ruined it.” Nigel hated talking about Gabi and everything that happened. It was incredibly painful. To admit he was the reason why his marriage failed. He had nobody to blame but himself. He looked into Will’s eyes, wanting to back out and not continue his story, could feel the boy drifting from him the more he spoke. He was admitting to not being good in relationships. And with everything Will had gone through, he wouldn’t put it past him to run after hearing all of it.

“I became someone I didn’t recognize. Fueled by a deep subconscious nagging that she wanted better and I lashed out for it. Frequently. Never towards her. But toward the other men in her life. And she began to hate me for it. I was clouded by love. I would’ve done anything for her, and in doing so I became someone I hated. I knew what I was doing was driving her away. Not to mention what I did for work. But I couldn’t stop, for multiple reasons. I felt forced into my profession because of fear of being retaliated against and I felt forced into staying how I’d always acted. I had fallen into this role and I couldn’t break from it. No matter how hard I tried.”

Nigel exhaled deeply again and Will crawled closer to cuddle up against him. The boy’s closeness and the fact that he wasn’t running was driving Nigel to the edge of emotion. He could feel the tears pooling at the bottom of his eyes, about to pour-over.

“Her father blackmailed me and got me kicked out of Bucharest. It was for her best interest. I accepted it and I stayed away. For years. And by the time I made my way back to her, she was in love with someone else.” He grit his teeth, remembering the pain of seeing her with someone new. He wasn’t still in love with her, but the memory brought images into his head of Will potentially with someone else, and that thought killed him. He couldn’t go through that again.

“I didn’t handle it well. Some shit happened and we ended up at a pier. She chose him. The cops surrounded me. And at that moment I had clarity. I thought, ‘If I pretend I have a gun, the cops will shoot me and this will all be over’”. A tear streamed down Nigel’s cheek. Will gently wiped it away.

“The pain of my past, the pain of losing her. The pain of living with knowing I was the reason why she didn’t love me anymore and that I ruined it. My marriage. My life. Everything would just go black. But…I didn’t. Because a voice in my head told me to hold on. That things would get better. That one day I would find the one I was truly supposed to be with. And I would do things right the second time around.”

He squeezed Will’s hand in his again. 

“I went to the brothel originally looking for a quick fuck. I wasn’t expecting to find any kind of connection. But then I saw you.” Nigel smiled at the memory. “My type is and has always been artists, you see?”

He chuckled and Will smiled. “I don’t care about your past. I don’t care what you did. We all have our stories. I’ve been in love with you from the moment you first looked up at me. I never thought you would be mine. My sunflower.” He caressed Will’s face. Will leaned into his palm.

“If anything, I should be asking what you see in me. I’m nothing. I’ve done some bad shit. But after all of this is over, I’m through. I want to start new with you. I want to be a better man. I…” Nigel huffed out a strangled cry. “I can’t do the same things I did with her with you. I can’t lose you.”

Will immediately moved to straddle Nigel, wrapping his arms around him and holding him tight. Burying his face in Nigel’s neck. Nigel rubbed the boy’s back as the tears began to flow.

“I’m a fucking piece of shit drug dealer, baby. I was so scared to tell you. Thinking you’ll think less of me.” Will responded with a squeeze but didn’t say a word. “After the cops surrounded me that night, I spent two months in prison. I was caught with a large supply. I was given an ultimatum. Prison for life. Or come to American to work undercover, to help incriminate people and put them away. Me and Darko, we both chose America. The deal was we got to keep all the money we made through the work, but I had to supply names and I couldn’t run. The deal was for three years and that ends in a week. I have to finish up everything and then we are free. If you…” Nigel exhaled. “If you don’t want this anymore, I will understand. I’ll be happy to help you to safety and give you plenty of money to live off of…and…”

“No,” Will said shaking his head, pulling back to place his hands on Nigel’s cheeks. “Don’t talk like that. I want you.”

Nigel cried. “Why? Why me, honey?”

“You treat me better than anyone I’ve ever known. You make me happy. Genuinely happy. I feel complete when I’m in your arms. We’ve been through shit. You helped me when I was at my lowest. You respect me. There isn’t anyone, look at me,” Nigel looked up. “There isn’t anyone else I would want to start a new life with.”

Will leaned in and joined their lips together. Nigel clutched at Will’s lower back under his shirt, crying in their embrace.

“Make love to me,” Will whispered against Nigel’s lips. “Show me what our forever is going to be like.”

“God,” Nigel sighed, he maneuvered them so Will’s back was against the bed and he was on top of him. He started by kissing his neck making the boy keen underneath him. Will wrapped his legs around Nigel’s waist and rolled his hips up at the same time as Nigel ground down. Their cocks made contact through their layers of clothing, rubbing through their sweatpants. They gasped into each other’s mouths.

Nigel leaned back and they looked into each other’s eyes. “Esti nenorocit de superb,” Nigel whispered, his breath quickened from his arousal, tracing his thumb across Will’s lower lip.

Will chuckled airily. “What?”

“It sounds a lot better in Romanian.”

Their lips joined again while Nigel undressed their bottom halves. Once their pants were off, Nigel continued rubbing himself against Will, their cocks wet at their tips and sliding together. Will gripped the back of Nigel’s head, wiggling under the man’s body. It felt so good, and he wasn’t even inside him, yet.

“Inside me, baby,” Will sighed, his chest rising and falling. “Nigel, please.”

Nigel reached for the bedside table to produce the lube and a condom. Will took the condom out of Nigel’s hand and tossed it away.

“Will…”

Will shook his head. “Want to feel you. All of you.”

Nigel knew he was clean, and Will always practiced safely at the brothel. He nodded.

Nigel dipped back down to kiss at Will’s neck while he prepped him. Fingers slick with lube sliding and curling into Will’s body again and again while he nuzzled him and got drunk off the pretty whining sounds the boy made. Will clutched at his man’s back with his legs folded back giving Nigel room.

Will bucked up, his cock hard against his stomach. He felt like he could come from only Nigel’s fingers inside. But he wanted desperately to come with his man’s cock inside him. “Please,” he whined again, nuzzling at Nigel’s cheek and kissing his lips.

Nigel slicked himself and lined up and began pressing into Will’s body, quivering beneath him. They both gasped, clinging to one another, their first time without any barrier. Just them. Just their bodies. Nigel slid in inch by inch until he was fully inside his love’s body. He shivered and looked down at Will’s face, his lower lip quivering. He leaned down and began kissing the scar on Will’s face, starting at his forehead, down his cheek and right above his lip.

“You’re so beautiful, baby,” he cried pulling his hips back to sink in again. “So fucking beautiful.”

Will cried, clinging to his man, his body open for him. The only man who could get him to realize his self-worth, the only man who had ever treated him like he was something more than an object. He loved him so much. He wished they could stay like this forever, in each other’s arms, as one.

“You feel so good inside me,” Will whined as Nigel’s thrusts got deeper and more precise.

It didn’t take long before Will was crying and trembling, coming untouched from the mental and physical stimulation. Nigel came immediately after, sighing and twitching as he came down. Their mouths hovering millimeters apart before joining again.

They were each other’s home. And always would be. 

* * *

One Week Later

Nigel laid something heavy in Will’s hands.

“Open your eyes,” Nigel said, excited for his love to see the gift he had gotten him.

Will did as instructed and looked down at the gun in his hands. It wasn’t at all what he had expected. But he didn’t expect any less from Nigel. He smiled.

“I got it custom made for you. Read the inscription,” Nigel held Will’s hand holding the weapon.

It was a pretty gun with a stainless steel barrel and a leather grip. The leather had little sunflowers carved into it as well as an inscription reading, ‘Love Always, Nigel.’

Will traced the inscription with his finger. “I love it.”

“It’s so you can protect yourself. Not that you’ll need it,” he chuckled. He was in high spirits since it was the last day of his contract. He was free starting that evening. They would be leaving the state in the morning. “I want you to keep it with you. Just incase. Okay?” 

“Thank you, baby,” Will kissed Nigel’s lips.

“I can take you to a range, teach you how to shoot.”

“I’d like that a lot.”

They kissed again. Nigel twirled his finger in Will’s long hair.

“So, what do you want to do on our last day in Louisiana?”

“I’d like to get out. Haven’t left this room in weeks,” he chuckled. He had healed over that time, not only his body with his soul. He was ready to get back out. “I’d like to see the city for the last time. With your hand in mine.”

“Mm, okay,” Nigel said. “Let’s go to dinner. I know this place down the street I’ve been dying to try. Then we’ll come back, turn in early, and hit the road?” 

“Our new life starts tomorrow?” Will smiled.

Nigel nodded. “It starts tomorrow.”

* * *

Over the past few weeks, Will had stood out on the balcony to get the fresh air he needed, but nothing compared to walking the streets, getting out and seeing other people, walking on cobblestone and sightseeing, with his hand in his love’s. He had missed it. Missed the normalcy. Everything was looking up. He was where he was meant to be.

But it was his first time out with his scar, which made him self conscious. But he didn’t want to mention it to Nigel, keeping it to himself.

Nigel took them to a French restaurant that was reservation only and ordered the most extravagant meals for the two of them to feast on. The waitress commented on what a beautiful couple they made which brought a blush to Will’s cheeks.

Will took a particular liking to the linguine.

“This is so good. I was getting sick of room service.”

Nigel chuckled. “So was I.”

They ate their fill while joking around and getting back into their silly banter.

“I’m not eating a fucking snail,” Will said.

“C’mon, it’s a delicacy.”

“Get it out of my face, Nigel. I swear to God.”

“Just a little taste,” Nigel pouted.

“Will you leave me alone if I try a little bit?”

“Yes.”

Will took a tiny bite from the corner of the snail on Nigel’s fork and grimaced, spitting it into his napkin.

“Aw c’mon, that was fifty bucks.”

They ordered a dessert to share and Nigel fed Will that too. A peach sorbet.

Will moaned. It melted in his mouth. “I need to learn how to make this.”

They finished their meal and kissed, cuddling up together in their booth, Nigel’s hand traced over Will’s.

“Are you going to miss it here?”

Will shook his head. “Not really.”

“You grew up here, it must feel like a part of you.”

Will shrugged. “I don’t have a connection to this place. Not after everything that has happened. I’m excited to leave. To see the world with you. Louisiana is just the start of my story, it’s not the end.”

Nigel nodded, kissing Will’s forehead. “I can’t wait to show you the world.”

* * *

Outside a window of the restaurant stood a man, peering in from his spot on the street. He was dressed in a suit, elegant with his hair combed to the side. He looked at Nigel and Will through the glass twenty-feet away, unnoticed, menacingly, a seething jealousy boiling in his stomach.

After a month of searching, he had finally found them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only two chapters left 🥺🌹


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is extremely intense. Please read with caution.

** A Year and Some Months Ago **

“Yeah, Dad, I should be able to make it home for your birthday,” the girl laughed into her cell phone receiver as her father told a silly joke on the other end. “I think finals are the week after, so it should be fine. Hey, I have to go. I’m out to dinner right now with Matthew. Four months, Dad,” she rolled her eyes. “It’s been a good four months, yes. I’ll try to bring him home. I know you have a shotgun.” She laughed again. “I’ll ask him tonight. Okay. Okay, I love you. Bye.”

The girl hung up the phone and turned her heel to head back into the restaurant to join her boyfriend again.

“Four months, huh?” The girl heard a man’s voice behind her. She whipped around with an audible gasp, spooked out of her skin. She hadn’t seen the stranger standing there. She laughed. The man looked harmless, though very out of place, he didn’t look like he belonged in that part of town at all. His outfit, a black number with white pinstripes, alone was probably more expensive than her boyfriend’s car.

“Yeah,” she exhaled, laughing again and immediately apologizing, her open hand laid against her chest. “I’m sorry, you scared the shit out of me.”

“I didn’t intend to startle you,” the man smiled, walking closer. “My deepest apologies.”

“It’s okay,” she smiled. “I’m constantly teased for being a chicken. I’m Lana,” she reached her hand out.

“Hannibal,” the man said with a polite nod. “I was waiting for a friend but it looks like he’s not showing up. I should be off. Congratulations on your four months.”

“Thank you,” she found the man odd, but he didn’t look like he could hurt a fly. Perhaps he was just lost, surely he was meant for an upscale restaurant uptown, not at the chain restaurant they currently stood in front of. 

“Babe, the shrimp dip just got to the table. Come on,” a boy around the girl’s age said, walking out of the restaurant doors. Matthew immediately looked from Lana to Hannibal. “Holy shit I know you! You bought Will’s paintings last week. Babe, he bought Will’s paintings last week,” he raised his eyebrows trying to get Lana to remember everything he had told him about the man. He nudged her. Lana stayed looking confused. “Holy shit, dude, what are you doing all the way out here?”

“Waiting on a friend,” Hannibal said. “I’m sorry, forgive me, I don’t recall our previous meeting.”

“Will’s my buddy. I was there when you bought his shit…his paintings…his…fuck…sorry.” Matthew laughed. “It’s fucking crazy I run into you, here of all places.”

Hannibal stayed feigning ignorance. “I’m sure you were just as charming that night. It still doesn’t ring any bells, however. Lana, it was a pleasure,” Hannibal nodded, turning his body angling himself to leave. “And you…”

“Matthew,” he said reaching to violently shake Hannibal’s hand. “God, man, you really helped him out by buying his stuff. Will is over the moon about being able to afford shit now.”

“Please give Will my regards. His paintings are in good hands.”

“Will do,” Matthew smiled.

“Here,” Hannibal reached into his pocket for his wallet and produced a single one hundred-dollar-bill and handed it to Matthew. “For your four months. It’d be my honor to pay for your meal.”

Matthew accepted it immediately without hesitation, stuffing the bill into his pocket. “Shit, thanks! You’re a good man.” Matthew turned to Lana and shrugged to reference Hannibal. “Fucking philanthropy. That’s what I want to be able to do one day. Thanks again, man.” He waved as he ushered Lana back inside.

“Enjoy your evening,” Hannibal nodded and was off.

* * *

Thirty-minutes later

“You have got to stop doing that!” Lana said, nearly jumped out her skin after turning the corner of the restaurant into the hallway where the restrooms were located. Hannibal was stood there leaning up against the wall between the men’s room and staff room doors. Her laughter trickled down. “Thank you for the money again. I got my own dessert! I thought you left? Did your friend end up coming back?”

Hannibal didn’t reply but made the one quick lightning-fast stride needed to get near Lana and turned her, snapping her neck in an instant before she could react. Hannibal exited out the staff door at the end of the hallway, carrying her to his car. Her limp body slung over his shoulder.

He had preemptively destroyed all security cameras to ensure an easy escape. He got the girl to his car undetected as he had parked in the shadows. He dumped her into his trunk and slammed it before pulling his vehicle back around front and entering through the main entrance of the restaurant like nothing had happened. His pulse not even quickening. Far too used to the macabre act of taking lives to let it affect him. 

He walked through the restaurant like everything was normal until he passed Matthew’s table. He was sat there alone, scraping the last bits of his chocolate cake from his plate with noisy clangs of fork against porcelain. Hannibal cringed at the sound, stood at the edge of the table until Matthew noticed him. “Oh, hey man,” Matthew said. “What’s up?”

“My car battery seems to have died,” Hannibal said with a light-hearted laugh. “I’ve been stranded here waiting for a jump. I believe I just saw Lana leave while I was waiting outside for Triple A. I witnessed her getting into a car just moments ago.”

“Nah, that couldn’t have been her,” Matthew said shaking his head. “She didn’t have anyone else picking her up. She’s in the toilet I think. You need a jump, man? I got you. Let me pay and we’ll meet you out there.”

Hannibal dropped another hundred dollar bill on the table. “Keep the one I gave you. I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news but it seems as if your girlfriend has abandoned you this evening.”

“She wouldn’t fucking do that, man,” he laughed nervously. “It must’ve been a doppelgänger or some shit.”

“Is this hers?” Hannibal opened his hand and a cheap earring in the shape of a red cartoony heart lay there. “It was in the parking lot right where she got into the vehicle.”

Matthew’s eyebrows furrowed. “She wouldn’t…Who…who was driving?”

“I didn’t get a clear look at them.” Hannibal put on a voice of concern. “I’m sorry. It may have been a friend. I’m sure it’s nothing out of the ordinary. I didn’t mean to upset you. She’ll probably be right back,” Hannibal gestured, nodding his head toward the outside. “I will however graciously accept that jump in the meantime.”

“Yeah,” Matthew nodded. “Yeah, okay.” He got up following Hannibal out the doors. Hannibal slowed his stride allowing Matthew to walk in front of him so he could follow the boy to his car. But Hannibal knew exactly which car was Matthew’s, he had parked right next to it.

Matthew got out his phone and dialed Lana’s number.

A muffled sound of a ringing phone sounded from Hannibal’s trunk. Lana’s ringtone. Matthew’s blood went ice cold, feeling Hannibal’s presence behind him. By the time Matthew turned Hannibal had advanced and clamped his hand down hard against Matthew’s mouth stifling his scream and dragged him into his backseat.

* * *

“What did you fucking do to her?” Matthew screamed trying to thrash his way out of Hannibal’s strong grip as they lay horizontally in the backseat of Hannibal’s car. “Get the fuck off me!”

Hannibal pressed a needle into Matthew’s arm and the fight left his body. His muscles felt too heavy but he was still fully conscious.

“She’s fine,” Hannibal whispered into Matthew’s ear, petting his hair. “She’s just fine. You do what I tell you to do and I’ll let her go. And you. But you have to cooperate with me.”

“Fuck you,” Matthew gritted his teeth.

Hannibal chuckled. “Or I could kill you now. Your choice?” He cooed.

“Is this about Will?”

Hannibal’s lips curled into a smirk against the back of Matthew’s ear. “And here I was thinking art students were stupid.”

“I’m not helping you trick him,” Matthew said, his voice barely coming out. The medicine was making his voice come out slurred.

“No tricks,” Hannibal said. “I only want you to disappear. I’ll pay for you and Lana to get away together for an entire year. Just one year. I have a house in Alaska you two can stay at. After you get back I’ll pay off both of your school loans and give you money to live off of and continue your education if you desire. I may even find it in my heart to fund a wedding for the two of you, if you decide you don’t hate each other after another year together, that is.”

“Fuck you. We don’t want anything from you. Let us go. I won’t tell anyone about this. Just please…” his eyes drooped. “Please let us go.”

“You missed the most important part, Matthew,” Hannibal said, speaking the boy’s name with a harsh bite. “If you don’t agree, I will kill you both. Either accept my gift or die. It’s your choice. Your little girlfriend is running out of air in the trunk. I’d hurry and decide if I were you.”

Lana was dead. But Matthew didn’t know that.

“What are you going to do with Will?” A tear streamed down Matthew’s cheek.

“That’s none of your concern. But trust that he will be in good hands. All I want is a year. I won’t harm a hair on his head. You have my word.”

“I don’t trust you.”

“You don’t have a choice.”

“What is it you want?” Matthew sighed. “Just for us to go?”

“First I need you to write a note out for me. For Will. I’ll leave it for him to find, don’t worry. Then I will send you and Lana away.” He produced a notepad from his pocket and held it, handing Matthew a pen. Matthew fumbled it but Hannibal helped him hold it, keeping his hand steady. Matthew considered taking the pen and stabbing Hannibal with it, but he knew he wouldn’t win that fight, besides he could barely move much more than an inch. Hannibal helped him write the note out, telling him exactly what he wanted him to say.

_ I’m sorry, Will. Forgive me. _

Those were the last words Matthew thought before Hannibal snapped his neck.

* * *

Hannibal waited to receive the inevitable phone call. The number came across the display the very next afternoon.

“Hello?” He answered as inconspicuously as he was able.

“Hi,” he heard the boy’s soft scared voice on the other end of the call. He smirked.

“Who is this?”

“It-it’s Will.”

The boy sounded upset.

“Will? Artist Will?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you alright, Will?” Hannibal’s voice was laced with faux concern. “You sound as if you’ve been crying?”

“My roommate left. Just out of nowhere, just...fucking left,” Will’s voice squeaked with emotion, sending an excited chill down Hannibal’s spine. “Um...I’m pretty sure I’m expelled. I have nowhere to go.” Hannibal licked his lips. He had Will exactly where he wanted him. Alone and desperate. His plan was coming to fruition. Of course, it was. All of his plans always did. He was an expert at tweaking the future to his advantage. Drunk on the power of it. An expert at toying with emotions and manipulating people to his benefit. Anything he wanted was his for the taking. And Hannibal had never wanted anything as much as he wanted Will. The pretty little fem boy would be the perfect addition to his brothel.

“I’ll be right there,” Hannibal said sounding compassionate. “I’ll be driving a black BMW. I’ll park near the dormitories. Give me an hour, okay, Darling?”

“Thank you.” The boy said. Hannibal hung up, giving one of his canine teeth a pleased lick. He couldn’t wait to twist the boy into becoming the exact person he wanted him to be. His pretty little body would bring in so much business. He couldn’t wait to show him off, mold him, train him. He would give Will the false sense of security, allow the boy to think he had a semblance of control over the situation. But in no time the boy would be selling his body. He would make sure of that. The boy was his. Until he got bored. He would have his fun in the meantime.

* * *

** A Year and Some Months Later **

“Maybe we should stop in there,” Will nodded his head toward the adult store on their way back to their hotel after dinner. His hand was laced in Nigel’s, subconsciously squeezing tighter at the sight of the contents of the store through the large glass windows. “We’ll need some fun things for our world tour,” he wiggled his eyebrows playfully and Nigel tugged the boy closer as they continued to walk past. He kissed the side of his forehead.

“Mm, I’ve never been a huge fan of toys,” Nigel said. They passed the store and continued down the cobblestone street.

“An outfit, then,” Will said with a pout. “I saw some cute skirts.”

“Baby, you deserve better than sex store wardrobe quality,” he chuckled. “It’ll fall apart in weeks.”

“Not if you rip it off first,” Will smirked.

Nigel turned to hold Will’s chin to kiss his lips. “I’ll treat you after we leave, okay? Impatient little thing.”

Will’s eyes sparkled looking up at the man. He nodded. “There’s no rush.”

“Not at all.”

The restaurant had been very close to their hotel, but they had decided to circle a mile to take the scenic route, enjoy the feeling of the air on their faces. Their first time out on the town together as a couple. Will caught some men and women eyeing Nigel up on their trek. Will’s eyes shot daggers through them. _ He’s mine, get your own. _ Nigel noticed silently and chuckled, holding Will tighter in response.

It was nearly midnight and the streets were sparse of people. Most of the shops had already closed for the evening. But the walk felt nice. Will had been cooped up for weeks. It was nice being out for a change.

“Can’t wait to do this in Paris,” Nigel said softly. “Milan. Sydney.”

Will squeezed Nigel’s hand tighter. He couldn’t wait either.

They were a few blocks from their hotel when they turned down an alley to take a cut path. The street lights above them were on but dim, the music from the bars and restaurants a mile away were still audible but very soft, all the shops around had closed and nobody else was on the street, but Will didn’t realize, too focused on his love.

A shadow emerged from around the corner, stepping into the light. Nigel saw it first, immediately moving to shove Will behind him taking a protective stance. His blood boiled, his nose and mouth twitching in a rage-filled grimace upon seeing who it was. He wanted nothing more than to tear the man’s head off but he was more focused on the boy he held behind him. He needed to protect him. That was his only concern.

Will was confused in a daze for a moment, wondering why he had been shoved to the side so quickly, but his instincts soon kicked in. The air felt freezing all at once, chilling his bones. Something didn’t feel right. He knew exactly what to expect when he peered around Nigel’s body.

Hannibal walked forward toward them, his posture perfect, his hands in his pockets, unbothered.

“I believe you have something that belongs to me,” Hannibal said, his chin lifted.

Nigel tightened his grip on Will’s arms behind him. “You’re lucky you’re still breathing, you sack of shit.” Nigel seethed. “Turn the fuck around before I blow your fucking brains out for what you did to him.”

Hannibal’s lips drew into a menacing smirk, narrowing his eyes like the predator he had perfected being over the past few decades. “What exactly did I do?” His voice was calm. “I recall him being the one at fault. But I’ve chosen to forgive him. I have always…” he chuckled, “…been rather impulsive. However, I never strike unless I’m struck first.” Hannibal tilted his head to the side, leaning around Nigel’s body to look into Will’s eyes.

Will dug his nails into Nigel’s arm, a natural reaction to the threat of his manipulator’s eyes making contact with his. The man once of his dreams had become the man of his nightmares, the creator of his trauma. The reason his face was maimed for life, not to mention his ruined ability to fully trust another human. 

“Will, I’d like you to come home. My car is around the corner,” he nodded. “Let’s go.”

He spoke with such confidence, not allowing mental room or even considering the possibility of Will denying him. But the lovesick puppy had grown up, the strings on his marionette had broken off long ago.

“No,” Will said.

“He’s not fucking going anywhere,” Nigel said shaking his head. “I have a gun. I will fucking shoot you if you do not leave, right now. This is your final warning.”

Hannibal stayed unbothered.

Will pressed his body closer against Nigel’s. 

“Will is coming home with me. I fought for him. I killed for him. He’s mine.” Hannibal’s cheeks heated, shifting his weight. “I will not hesitate to kill you too. I’m well trained. That gun won’t help you.”

“Who…who did you kill?” Will said stepping out further from behind Nigel to address Hannibal. His love’s hands still held tight on him.

“Your infantile little friendship was keeping you away. You declined my offer so I did what I had to. I once told you I would do anything for you. I meant it.”

Will’s blood ran cold. “Matthew? You hurt Matthew?”

“I helped you find your purpose. Your true potential. You were wasting away at that school, remember? You were better under my roof. Happier. In love. Carefree. Adorned with the finest things. Don’t you miss that? Come home. I’ll give you your money. It’ll be like none of this ever happened. We’ll get you some surgery for that scar. Some makeup in the meantime. I’ll admit I’m not proud of that lapse in my composure.”

“Is he…dead?”

“Who?”

“Matthew.”

Hannibal smirked.

“Up until recently, he was in my fridge. Just finished off the last loin of him three days ago. Do you remember my Thursday evening stews? He really brought out the flavor, didn’t he? I’m sure Randall will taste just as delectable.” 

“You…” a sudden bought of dizziness and nausea hit Will at full force and he turned to heave his supper onto the pavement, slipping out of Nigel’s grasp in the process.

Hannibal took the opportunity to advance. Nigel drew his gun but it was too late. Hannibal knocked it out of his hand and it skidded across the pavement. Will was incapacitated in his sick, sobbing and gripping the cobblestones, his entire body felt like it was on fire, the sound of the men fighting sounded like it was miles away. This was a nightmare. It was all a sick nightmare.

Hannibal drew his knife striking forward aiming for Nigel’s head but Nigel ducked, the knife found purchase in his arm instead slicing across his bicep. Nigel head-butted Hannibal’s face, stunning him and allowing him to get a few more punches in pressing his fingers over the man’s eyes and pressing in hard, attempting to blind him. Hannibal struck out again with his knife stabbing Nigel’s thigh to get him off and shoved him back, standing in a quick movement and forcing Nigel to his knees holding the large knife against his throat. Nigel slammed his hands back trying to get out of the hold but Hannibal pressed the sharp blade of the knife against Nigel’s neck cutting him, a pearl of blood trickled down to his clavicle.

Hannibal chuckled in Nigel’s ear. “I always win.”

“Please,” Will cried.

Hannibal heard Will’s plea. He had righted himself and was standing looking down at the scene. Nigel and Will’s eyes met. Nigel mouthed the words ‘I love you’. Will shook his head, his lower lip trembling. This wasn’t the end. This couldn’t be the end.

“Hannibal, please. Don’t.”

“Get in the car,” Hannibal said, gritting his teeth. “I’ll let him go if you do.”

Will shook his head. He knew that if he left Hannibal would kill Nigel. “Let him go first.”

“The clients are rioting. They all miss you. I miss you.”

“I know,” Will nodded. “It’ll be just like the old days. I’ll go with you. Just let him go,” his voice broke. He kept his gaze on Hannibal, he had to for him to trust him. “If you hurt him I will never touch you again.”

“You’ve missed me haven’t you, Darling?”

Will nodded, tears streaming down his face. Disgusted at his own lies, but he needed to do it. For Nigel’s sake. He could feel Nigel’s gaze on him. He wanted so badly to look at him, and not his abuser. “I have. I’ve missed you.”

Hannibal pressed the knife harder against Nigel’s throat making the man groan. More blood trickled from the wound.

“Stop hurting him,” Will cried. “I promise I’ll go with you. Please, just stop.” His voice faltered. 

Hannibal was lost in a rage, could feel Nigel’s heartbeat through his throat against the knife and the heel of his hand. Everything Nigel had taken from him, he wanted him to die. He wanted to cut him open. Watch his blood spurt out. Make him pay for what he had stolen.

While Hannibal looked away, at his knife and the trickling of the blood, Will pulled his own gun out from behind himself, took the safety off in his movement and held it out aiming it at Hannibal’s head three feet away. He should’ve shot right then, but he hesitated, his hand shaking.

Hannibal chuckled. “I knew it. Once a lying whore always a lying whore. Hm?”

“Let him go,” Will said.

“I can smell the fear on you. True fear,” Hannibal smirked. “The fear of loss. You really have feelings for this…cretin?”

“Do you not see what I’m fucking holding? Let him go!”

“You won't do it. And if you try, I’ll turn him the second you fire and he will be the one that takes the bullet. Not me. You lost your chance. Idiot boy. The moment of surprise is gone. I have the advantage. Now go. Get in the car like a good boy. Leave daddy to his business.”

_ Daddy _ . That word. The way Hannibal had used it was always a way to display he held power over him. It was never a word that meant what it was supposed to mean. Loving. Nurturing. Caring. It was a word used to excuse the abuse Hannibal had put on his mind and body from day one. And Will had been stupid enough to fall for it. _ Daddy _. The word was used to keep him in line. Weak. To pull him down. To feel less than. Like an employer indebted to his boss. It was all about power. Always about power.

Will was stunned in thought, his weapon still held out when Nigel took advantage of the silence.

In an instant, Nigel grabbed the knife against his throat, digging his nails into Hannibal’s hand to pull him back, taking the weapon from the man and whipping around to stab Hannibal in the shoulder, shoving him and getting him onto the ground.

Will took the cue and stepped forward.

Everything happened in slow motion. Will saw the sudden fear in Hannibal’s eyes, the first time Will ever witnessed him showing his humanity. Will heard his father’s voice in his head transporting him back in time to a hunting trip he had been brought along on. “Shoot it,” his father had said, standing behind a trembling seven-year-old Will. The sparrow on the branch a yard away was distracted with the feeder. “Go on, son. Shoot it. Make me proud.” But Will couldn’t. He couldn’t kill an innocent animal. No matter how badly he craved his father’s approval. The bird had never done anything to him. Unlike Hannibal, who had destroyed his entire being from the ground up. Will didn’t hesitate. For the first time in his life. The first shot went straight through Hannibal’s forehead, deafening Will. He emptied the clip into the man’s head, not even able to hear his own anguished screams or the loud shots of gunfire through his rage. His face was doused in blood from the proximity. Will dropped his gun and collapsed into Nigel’s arms sobbing and shaking.

“We have to go,” Nigel said smoothing Will’s hair. “We have to go.” But Will didn’t hear him. They had to flee the scene, and quickly, before they were discovered.

Nigel gathered Will up into his arms and grabbed both of their guns before making his way back to their hotel. The sounds of police sirens sounded from a distance. Will clung to Nigel, his cries soon dying out as he slipped into a state of shock. He stared forward at nothing, his mind completely shattered, slowly struggling to stitch itself back together again.

Nigel took the side service entrance and stairs up to their hotel so they wouldn’t be seen. Once inside he stood Will in the corner and unloaded his own gun, dropping them both into a smaller bag that he tossed into the single open suitcase they had started packing before dinner. They needed to get on the road, and fast, but first they needed to clean themselves up. Nigel had to make sure the evidence was gone, that none of the blood had gotten left behind.

Will stared forward at the corner of the room until Nigel was back addressing him.

“Baby, we need to get in the shower. You need to shower. Can you do that for me?”

Will’s hand raised slowly, touching the side of Nigel’s neck, the cut bisecting the tattooed girl there. The wound was still bleeding. “I’m okay. It’s okay.” He cooed, holding Will’s hand and lowering it.

Nigel was in a state of shock himself. His arm was sliced and his thigh was stabbed, but he couldn’t feel a thing. Too full of adrenaline, too focused on getting he and Will somewhere safe and away from everything.

“Come on, we have to hurry.” He took he and Will’s blood-flecked clothes off and dropped them into the suitcase, making sure to keep things as clean as possible. He took Will’s hand and wheeled them into the bathroom, helping Will lift his foot into the shower and turned the water on.

Will stared forward as Nigel maneuvered Will until he was standing under the stream. Hannibal’s blood on his face and neck slowly washed away. Nigel helped it along, wiping his cheeks and forehead with his hand, not wanting to use a washcloth that could gather evidence. Will looked down at the red water circling down the drain. He heaved up a bit of bile and Nigel held him up, petting his back. “It’s okay. It’ll all be okay.”

Nigel washed their bodies with soap before washing their hair, speaking softly and delicately to Will the entire time, keeping a close eye on him and making sure he was okay. He was ready to catch him if he collapsed or passed out, which Nigel knew typically came after being in a state of shock.

Will began to cry again, his body shaking.

Nigel shushed him softly petting his hair and holding the boy against him under the water. Will reached up and clung to him, weeping openly. So many thoughts were bombarding his mind. He couldn’t help but feel abandoned yet again. Hannibal had ruined him, destroyed his life, his best friends, and had almost taken his love away from him and yet Will mourned him. Not him, per se, but the past, the man he thought he knew. He had been manipulated, abused, used. Nothing was real at Desert Rose. Behind the curtain, everything had been a sick fabrication. He had been so stupid. Will could have sworn Hannibal loved him, that it had all been real. What if what he and Nigel had wasn’t real either? He didn’t trust himself to know the difference. What if Nigel turned out to be the same way? Nigel could tell him a million times how much he loved him and he would never believe it. After his past. His trust was gone. Shattered. Ripped and tossed to the wind. He was damaged goods. In so many ways.

“Don’t hurt me,” Will cried. “Please don’t be like him. Don’t hurt me. Don’t leave me, please.” He didn’t realize he was speaking out loud until Nigel’s body shook in his, crying tears of his own, gripping him even tighter.

“Never, baby. Never.”

* * *

After their shower, Nigel led Will to the bed to lie down while he cleaned the entire bathroom with bleach and patched his own wounds with gauze and medical tape for a quick fix. He would do a better job of cleaning his cuts and the deep gash in his leg when they were somewhere safe. He packed up all of their things and dressed himself before helping Will dress. He was drifting in and out of sleep now, emotionally and physically exhausted.

“You can sleep when we get to the car,” Nigel told him softly. “We’re almost finished.”

He fixed up their luggage and held his hand out for Will. “Can you walk, baby?”

Will nodded, accepting Nigel’s hand. He wheeled their luggage behind him as they left the room and headed for the parking garage on the lowest floor. Will clung to him in the elevator. Nigel nuzzled into his neck whispering assurances that he’s not going anywhere and that everything would be okay. He would say it a million times if he needed to, until Will believed him. Even if he never did, Nigel would always be there to say it.

Nigel helped Will to the car and put him into the passenger’s seat and put their luggage in the trunk, changing their license plates quickly before sitting back in the driver’s seat. Will was asleep, his head against the rest. Nigel leaned over Will and buckled the seatbelt over him before he adjusted the boy’s seat so it was further back so he would be more comfortable. He kissed the sleeping boy’s forehead, lingering his lips over his skin for a moment, promising himself that he would do anything and everything in his power to protect Will. It was his duty now, and the highest honor. Once the boy awoke again, everything would be different. But first, he needed to sleep his old life away. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one chapter left 🥺🥺🌹🌹


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ending to the story.

Nigel drove all night while Will slept. He knew from experience that Will was a fairly heavy sleeper, but he didn’t want to turn on the radio or even take a single drag of a cigarette if it meant risking disturbing the boy’s rest. He drove in silence for just under twelve hours, focused on nothing but his thoughts, every few moments taking a second or two to steal a glance at the sleeping beauty in his passenger’s seat. Will looked peaceful. Nigel would’ve hated ripping the boy from the comfort of his mind and back into reality before he was ready to face it again. 

Nigel hoped within his heart of hearts that the boy would be okay after everything that had transpired. It would take time for him to heal, for his mind to process what had happened, for him to forgive himself for killing his abuser, and even longer for Will to get the horrific image of Hannibal’s dead body out of his head. Nigel was committed to being with Will throughout his entire journey of healing. He would be whatever Will wanted him to be. He would be his crying shoulder, his defender, and he would live and die being the biggest fan of Will Graham’s life. 

The further north Nigel drove the higher he had to turn up the heat in his car. One thing Nigel had enjoyed about southern Louisiana was its warm weather, even during the early months of winter. It was very easy to forget they were in the middle of winter in the south. Southern states weren’t blessed in being able to experience the true glory of all four of the seasons. The north knew true autumn when the leaves turned vibrant shades of red and orange, and during the winter it knew snow. 

Will had mentioned once about how he’d never left Louisiana in his life, and he had never seen or experienced snow. Nigel never cared for the cold, having grown up in the tundra of Romanian winters. He grew up dreaming of one day living in a warmer climate, but he couldn’t deny the beauty of snow. He understood how someone could find the look of it appealing, especially if they weren’t forcibly raised around the stuff. For Nigel he saw snow as a nuisance, for someone with fresh eyes such as Will, he would see it as a sight to behold, an eighth world wonder. As Nigel drove and began seeing blankets of snow across the ground he began to get emotional, imagining the look of excitement on Will’s face once he finally got to see it. 

Nigel was half tempted to wake Will up right at that moment, upon seeing the first snowfall, but it wasn’t time yet. He knew exactly where he was going. He was saving it for that moment. He drove trying to piece his words together, of what he was going to tell the boy. He wanted to make sure Will knew he wasn’t going anywhere, that he was there for good. He wanted Will to know how much he meant to him, what he would do for him. He wanted Will to feel safe and know there was no longer a threat. He would spend the rest of his life making sure Will never again felt pain of any sort. He would absorb it all himself. 

Eventually, after many hours of driving, Nigel reached the place he had set out for. The place he had fantasized about bringing Will to for the past few months he had known the boy. Since their very first meeting. Before waking Will up, he sat for a while longer, pondering his life, his past, and his future. He had been given a second chance. He would do it right this time around. He would control his emotions, he would be more open about his feelings, he would be there for Will in not only in the good times but times of trouble. He wouldn’t retreat into his own head when things got rough. Not like how he had with his ex-wife. He had learned from his mistakes. He got a do-over. Not many people were so lucky. 

Nigel looked at Will for a moment. So beautiful. Lost in sleep. Content. His eyes moved beneath his lids, dreaming. Everything for Nigel since he had met Will had seemed like a dream too. He prayed the dream would continue. As long as Will was by his side, it would. 

“Wake up, baby,” Nigel said softly, gently coaxing the boy back into consciousness. His knuckle glided against Will’s soft unscarred cheek.

Will’s eyes moved and gently flickered open and closed again, nuzzling into Nigel’s hand with a soft disoriented whine. 

“I know,” he said. “I know. I just want to show you something.” 

Will’s eyes opened and he took Nigel in, his heart yearned for the man. Wanting to pull him close immediately but his exhausted body wasn’t allowing for such hasty movements. 

“Look,” Nigel cooed. 

Will turned his head to look out the front window and his features softened all at once as he sat up tentatively to get a closer look, his turquoise eyes glistening in the afternoon sun. Outside the window were mountains, capped in snow. It was unlike anything Will had ever seen in his life. A fantasy he had held for years. Will stared for a full minute, his mouth slightly agape as he took in the gorgeous view in front of them. Nigel had parked them on top of a mountain overlooking multiple others. He sat watching Will’s reaction, giving him all the time in the world to take everything in. Will closed his mouth and a single tear rolled down his cheek. Nigel reached to hold Will’s hand, who clasped his other hand over their joined ones. Not taking his eyes off the scene but squeezing Nigel’s hand tightly in both of his. 

Nigel took a deep breath and started his prepared speech. 

“Whatever you want. I’ll get it for you. Wherever you want to go. I’ll take you there. I’ve loved you since the first moment I saw you, drawing mountains just like those.” Nigel inhaled and exhaled, taking his time before his next sentence. “And one day, when all of this passes, if you’ll have me…..I want to marry you on a mountain just like that one.” 

Will turned to look at Nigel, his lower lip quivering. His eyes were glassy and full of emotion. 

Nigel continued. 

“I want to be there for you when you’re happy, when you’re upset, through it all. I want to know you and be with you. You don’t have to hide any aspect of yourself. Ever. You can be whatever you want and I will always love you. Always. We get a fresh start. I want to spend the rest of my life making you feel safe, loved…cherished.” 

Will allowed Nigel’s words to wash over him, rooting him to his seat. It was everything he had ever wanted to hear. From the man he had always wanted to hear it from. 

“You don’t have to answer me right now. Just know that you have me. And no matter what you always w…”

“I love you,” Will sighed, his words breaking off into a gentle sob.

“Yeah?” Nigel said, moving to hold Will’s face with his hands. 

Will sat forward, nodding.

Nigel would never tire of hearing those words. Each time sounding like a symphony playing just for him. Each chord plucked, each string bowed, stimulated his soul. It was a feeling meant for royalty, or people who had done good deeds in their lives, what did Nigel do to ever deserve such happiness? 

Nigel pulled Will against him as they kissed, finally untethered from their bonds, free from the chains holding them to the past. The future was theirs to weave however they seemed fit. Together. 

When Nigel was a child, around five, he developed a strangely overwhelming affinity with flowers. He would spend his early years picking them and collecting different types and cataloging them by pressing them into books and labeling them. It was an odd amusement and Nigel always preferred to do that instead of play ball or war with the other neighborhood boys. His step-father didn’t take a liking to his strange pastime, always teasing him for being a girly boy to the point that young Nigel eventually lost his passion for it. It was a hobby Nigel had thought he had grown out of. Until he met Will. Nigel had immediately been drawn in by his beauty, entranced by his scent, and kept, pressed into the book of his mental palace to stay, for his warmth, and how he made him feel. Nigel had found the finest piece of his abandoned collection. Finally. He had his sunflower. 

* * *

** Epilogue**

** Twenty-Years-Later **

_ “Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful?” – Lana Del Ray _

“Do you want me to grab you a pint, love?” A man asked his wife lounged back in a high backed leather chair. She was halfway through getting a black and gray hyper-realistic dragon tattoo on her thigh. 

“No,” Will said, stopping his tattoo gun and wiping the area over the tattoo with a cloth, pushing his glasses further up his nose. “No drinking in my shop. Keep that downstairs, please.” 

“Oy, mate, there’s no sign in here that says that.” 

“It’s my rule,” Will said starting the gun up again and lowering his head, drawing a perfect line down the woman’s leg. “Please respect it.” 

“Harry, darling,” the woman said in her equally thick English accent. “Respect his rule. I don’t want to get kicked out halfway through another tattoo.” 

“Fine, I’ll just have my drink downstairs then,” the man huffed and left.

“Sorry about that,” the woman said. “He’s difficult.” She noticed the ring on Will’s finger. The silver band with a diamond on top, surrounded by petals of citrine, making a sunflower out of the stones. It matched the small tattoo on his hand. A sunflower that served as a cover-up to something that was once there years ago. 

“You married?” She said. 

Will noticed her gaze. “Yeah.” He smiled. 

“Ah, so you know how it is.” 

Will laughed with a shrug. He wouldn’t exactly say his relationship was anything like the couple's. They had been bickering since the moment they had entered his shop. 

“You’re handsome as all hell. I will say that.” She smiled. “Who’s the lucky lady?” 

Will opened his mouth to respond when the door to the shop opened and a man entered. He had grey hair, a short grey beard, was in his early sixties and was still extremely handsome. He was holding a bouquet of purple roses and sunflowers. 

“Speak of the devil,” Will chuckled turning back to the woman’s tattoo and finished off another line. He cocked his head toward the man. “My wife.” 

The woman’s mouth was slightly agape as Nigel walked over. Nigel gave the woman a polite nod and Will lifted his foot from the tattoo gun pedal and turned accepting a quick peck from his husband. 

“Hey,” Will said. They kissed again. “How was your day?” 

“It was okay,” Nigel said, his voice gruff. “Finally got through inventory. Went out to get you this.” He held up the bouquet. The big ‘Happy Anniversary’ tag was over the flowers. 

“They’re beautiful, babe. Thank you. Are you going to take them upstairs? Make sure to put sugar in the water. And please keep it out of Puck’s reach this time.” 

“I will,” Nigel smiled. “I like your haircut.” 

Will rubbed the top of his head. “You don’t think its too short?” He grimaced. “I haven’t had hair this short since I was in the seventh grade.” 

“I think it’s cute,” Nigel said, playfully tapping at the back of Will’s earlobe. “You can see your cute ears.” 

Will blushed, laughing and nodding his head. “Get out of here.”

“Meet you upstairs when you’re done.” 

“Okay.” 

Nigel bent to kiss Will’s lips again and was off, headed for the door in the corner leading to the locked third-floor stairwell. 

Nigel and Will lived in a three-story building in central London they had owned for the past five years. The first floor was Nigel’s bar he managed, the second story was Will’s tattoo parlor, and they lived in the penthouse. It was one of their many homes, but the place served as their main hearth. It was where they spent the majority of their time. 

The woman laughed once Nigel was gone. “Forgive me” 

Will shook his head. “It’s okay” 

“Today is your anniversary?” 

“Yep, nineteen years.” 

“Nineteen?” She looked shocked. 

Will nodded.

“You married young, eh? You can’t be a day over forty.” 

“I was young, he wasn’t,” Will laughed. 

“I see that. How in the world did you two meet? By mere happenstance? Robbing the cradle. Must be a story behind all that.” 

“It’s a very, very long story,” Will said, wiping the tattoo and getting back to work. 

The woman looked down at her tattoo which was half-way finished. There were at least another two and a half hours left in the session. “I have time.” 

Will laughed. “Alright, I hope you have an open mind.” 

Will told her the basics but kept out the sad bits. Changing the ending of the story, of course. 

“So you just knew?” 

Will nodded. “More or less, yeah.” 

“That’s so romantic. You just left to be with him?” 

Will smiled. He wished it had been that easy. The scar on his face was still visible, but it had gone down quite a bit over time. Will had stopped wearing makeup to cover it ten years prior. He didn’t mention that, how he had gotten the scar or any of the abuse. Giving the woman a much more subdued version of the story, as he always did when people asked. He wasn’t ashamed of his past but he didn’t like digging into old wounds if he didn’t need to. On the same token, he loved seeing people’s reactions upon hearing he used to work at a brothel. 

“You should write a novel about your story. I’d buy it.” 

Will smirked. He’d heard that a million and one times. 

* * *

As soon as the woman’s tattoo was finished, Will wrapped her up and closed up shop. It was just past eleven in the evening when Will finally made it up to he and Nigel’s flat. His keys jingling in the door roused their dog who began whining and scratching at the door the second he heard him.

Will opened the door and immediately dropped to his knees to ruffle the long-haired dachshund’s fur with a huge smile on his face. “Hey, Puck! Hey boy! How was your day? Huh? How was your day?” He kissed the top of his head while the dog’s tail was going nuts wagging back and forth, giving Will’s hands and arms kisses. “Did Papa give you dinner? Huh? You hungry?” 

Will stood up and walked into the kitchen. Puck followed, trotting behind. “Nigel?” Will called across the flat. “Did you give Puck his dinner?” 

“Yeah,” Nigel called back in response from the other room. 

“Well someone was a good boy today so he gets an almost-midnight treat,” Will spoke to the dog reaching into the jar of doggie treats to fetch a little biscuit in the shape of a bone. “Sit. Good boy.” He fed Puck the treat and ruffled his ears. “Such a good boy!” 

He righted himself and began walking back to he and Nigel’s bedroom. On his way passing the bouquet Nigel had gotten him, placed in a vase on the mantle. The flowers were indeed gorgeous. Every year for their anniversary Nigel got him a different bouquet. But every year, since their very first wedding anniversary, the bouquet had always included sunflowers. Will frequently found it amusing that a single outfit he had chosen to wear for one day during an outing at the French Quarter twenty years prior was still determining what flowers he received in his bouquets. But ever since that day that was what Nigel called him. His sunflower. Will never complained. He found it far too cute. The night of their first kiss was one they would never forget. 

Many photographs adorned the mantelpiece, capturing and forever preserving moments throughout their nineteen years of marriage. The first was their wedding photo. Nigel had worn a traditional black suit and bow-tie, while Will had worn a tight all-white suit. His hair had grown to a few inches past his shoulders and it was worn down that day. The photo was of their first kiss as husbands, Nigel’s hand laced through Will’s long tendrils as their lips moved together, the purple and pink sunset was behind them and they were stood on a mountain. 

The second photo was a selfie photograph of them sat together on a couch with their first dog, a pretty blonde dachshund they had named Luna. She had been a birthday gift for Will from Nigel and she was the sweetest dog Will had ever known. Nigel’s first. Will had taught Nigel how to care for her and how to train her. She was very smart and loyal, cuddling with them both at night, serving as a little space-heater for their feet under their comforter every evening She had lived a long fifteen years. Nigel took it harder than Will, not being used to the idea of losing a pet. Their second dog Puck had been a gift to Nigel from Will two days after Luna’s passing, bringing the little red-haired dachshund puppy home and surprising his husband with him. Nigel immediately began crying holding the little puppy for the first time. 

One of the photos was from their honeymoon, just of Will in a yellow sundress walking down the streets of Italy. Nigel had taken it when Will had his back turned and had walked a few yards ahead. It was Nigel’s favorite photo and sometimes Will found Nigel standing in their living room sipping from a glass of scotch while staring at it. Their honeymoon had been magical. Another photo was from the same trip, but this one had Nigel and Will both in the photo as they swam in a shallow part of the ocean. Will’s legs wrapped around Nigel’s waist as he held him up, huge smiles plastered on both of their faces. The photo was taken by another tourist who was kind enough to send them the photo afterward. The photo was taken seconds before Nigel flipped Will back into the water with a laughing grunt. 

And the last photo was another candid Nigel had taken of Will. From their years they lived in Paris. Will frequently found solace in painting on the balcony after breakfast each morning. A cup of coffee by his side as he either focused out at the scenery or focused inside his head drawing and painting from memory. Nigel captured him perfectly, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration, his brush against the canvas. The photo was taken the same day Will started his tattoo artist apprenticeship. It was something he wanted to fool around with, but he hadn’t expected to fall in love with it, much less end up owning a tattoo parlor one day. 

Nigel, who could never draw anything more than a stick figure but had the yearning of having a creative outlet had taken up a hobby of writing poetry. He didn’t do it professionally or make money off his craft like Will did, but it allowed him a way to get all his feelings out. His love for Will was so strong if he didn’t get his emotions out he swore he would explode.

Nigel wrote poetry for years without Will knowing. Too nervous to admit it, too worried he would get teased. Although he knew Will would never do such a thing. The first poem he ever wrote Will and showed him was in one of their anniversary cards. 

_How is it, wind over water _

_ Never has the strength _

_ To move a vessel, without the hands of a man _

_ Against the wheel. _

_ To help it along. _

_ The wind is dependent on man. _

_ The man on the wind. _

_ To point it north. _

_ So he can find his way home. _

_ I thank the wind. _

_ For without it, _

_ I would not have been steered _

_ Toward you. _

_   
Happy Twelfth Anniversary, Sunflower. _

“Did you write that?” Will said turning to his husband as they sat on the couch exchanging gifts. Nigel nodded, his chin on Will’s shoulder. 

“You’re a poet now? That’s sexy as hell, you know that?” 

Nigel grunted with a laugh. “Why do you think I started?” He ran his hands up and down Will’s thighs from behind him and kissed his neck. “You really like it?” 

“You’re amazing,” Will said kissing his lips. “How long have you been writing poetry?” 

“Few years.” 

“A few…Nigel…you better write me a poem every day for the rest of our lives.” 

And so ever since that day, Nigel did. He would leave notes for Will to find in the evenings or mornings, or sometimes even text the poems to Will during the day if he didn’t have time. But he never missed a day. Always, every day, writing a poem for his love. Some of them were only two lines, some three, and some were full pages of text. It made Nigel happy to see Will enjoying his writing, to remind him every day how much he loved him, to get his emotions out while keeping his husband satisfied. 

“Stay out here, buddy,” Will said to Puck as he neared he and Nigel’s bedroom door. “Go to your bed. Go,” he cooed. 

Puck trotted over to his bed in the corner of the living room and plopped down. Will smiled at the sight before opening his bedroom door and shutting it, making his way across the room to drape himself over Nigel’s body. He was sat at his computer typing in inventory numbers from the bar into a spreadsheet. Will took his glasses off and folded them onto the table, wrapped his arms around his husband and kissed his neck. 

“Happy nineteen years,” Will said softly, kissing over his husband’s neck tattoo. The scar from the scuffle decades ago was there and still prevalent, but Will never got tired of showing that area of his body affection. It had been a fantasy of his to kiss that area since he was forbidden from the act of lip to skin contact. Ever since he was free to do so, he did, and often. 

Nigel stopped typing and grasped Will’s arms wrapped around his chest, leaning back against him. He groaned. “Nineteen. God, I’m an old man.” 

“You?” Will laughed. “What about me?” 

“You’re not old, Will. You’re the same age I was when I met you.” 

“Not even.” 

“See? Stop bragging.” 

Will smiled, accepting his husband’s kiss. 

“You really like my haircut?” Will touched his own head again, grimacing at the length. “I hate it. It’s so…fucking masculine.” 

“I like it a lot.”

“You would,” Will rolled his eyes. 

“It looks good, baby. It’s a bit short but you still have your curls. Your face is so gorgeous you can pull it off.” 

“I don’t want to _ pull it off _, I want to look good,” Will pouted. 

Will had become insecure about his aging more and more over the past few years, needing validation at every turn, and Nigel was always happy to give it. In Nigel’s eyes, Will was just as beautiful then as he had been more than twenty years ago. Sure his skin had sagged a bit, the crows-feet next to his eyes were more pronounced but he was still the beautiful boy he had fallen in love with all those years ago. 

“Baby, you’re perfect,” Nigel assured him kissing his forehead. “Besides, it’s only hair. It’ll grow back.” 

Will nodded. Nigel was right. He was being ridiculous. 

“Am I still your pretty boy?” Will said softly, holding his husband. 

Nigel groaned. “You’re always going to be my pretty boy, baby.” 

“Yeah?” 

Nigel kissed his lips. Will pulled back from their embrace and walked around, pushing Nigel’s chair back a bit from the desk to give himself room to drop to his knees in front of him. He placed his cheek on Nigel’s thigh. “Call me your pretty boy.” He rubbed his face against the fabric, his voice gentle. 

“Pretty…” Nigel pet Will’s cheek. “So beautiful, baby. Always so fucking beautiful.” 

Will nuzzled against Nigel’s hand kissing his palm before reaching to unbutton his husband's pants. Nigel lifted his hips helping Will tug them and his briefs down just past his mid-thigh. Will kissed up Nigel’s thigh, his mouth breathing hot hovering over Nigel’s hardening cock. 

Nigel’s breaths were shallow, his hand carded through Will’s short hair as he began peppering hot open-mouthed kissed against his shaft and up toward the head to envelope him. More than twenty years later and Will on his knees for him still got him weaker than anything else. He began to fill out quickly as Will stroked him with his tongue and fist, pumping and dribbling spit for added slickness. Will slapped Nigel’s cock against his tongue a few times staring directly up at him, causing Nigel’s hips to buck forward and for him to curse. “Fuck, baby,” Will smirked and continuing his teasing. He kissed the tip and continued stroking with his hand. 

“It’s still amazing that you never need Viagra,” he laughed with a wink. He frequently teased Nigel about that, always jokingly poking fun at his age, expecting another round of teasing banter but Nigel’s eyes were too blown out with lust to care. 

“Never. Not with you. Fucking never with you,” Nigel said, tugging Will up and forward onto his lap so he was straddling him in the chair. He pulled Will down to him to join their lips rolling their hips together, their cocks touching through the fabric of Will’s pants. 

Nigel unbuckled Will’s pants and awkwardly tugged them down, leaving his undergarments on. A pair of sheer pink panties. Nigel groaned, running his open hands over them, along his front and his cheeks. Will smirked rolling his hips forward into Nigel’s hands. The majority of Will’s undergarments were flimsy feminine things, but Nigel never got over discovering them. Each new pair was a wonderland, a new shiny colorful candy bar he was always excited to unwrap. 

“My pretty…girl,” Nigel sighed, leaning to lick at Will’s nipple through his t-shirt. He knew how that word drove Will wild, the validation for his identity, the sin of it. Will clutched the back of Nigel’s long silver-colored hair as he teased him. He rolled his hips down, the fabric of his panties wetting from the feeling of his husband’s cock against him. Will tugged his shirt up and off to allow Nigel easier access.

Will’s body was no longer the thin boyish frame he had once had, but was more filled out, his thighs were thick and muscular to match his arms, his shoulders were more broad and Nigel still couldn’t get enough. Still treating his love like the demure little thing he wanted to be seen as. 

The material of Will’s panties was so thin it felt like it could tear at any moment. After minutes of Nigel licking and sucking at Will’s nipples, his cock was wet with Will’s precome, leaking through the fabric. Nigel continued his barrage of compliments and praises. “Such a pretty girl. Always my pretty girl too.” He spoke almost under his breath. 

Will began trembling in his grasp. Nigel’s nails had started skating along Will’s back making him keen and twitch. He leaned to kiss Nigel’s lips again. “Take me to the bed, baby.” 

Nigel gathered Will in his hold and stood up in one fluid moment. Will’s legs wrapped around Nigel as he walked them to the bed. Laying Will down, Nigel kissed up Will’s thighs to begin laving and kissing at Will through his panties, just as he had the night they had first kissed, so many years ago. 

Will’s hips moved from side to side at the sensitive area receiving a barrage of gentle kisses and sucks. Nigel’s silver beard he had grown out for the past month felt heavenly against the material, tickling him and sending Will close to the edge. “Baby,” he sighed, petting Nigel’s shoulder. Nigel tugged Will’s panties off and took him into his mouth, dipping down, his throat relaxed to take him deep. Before Will, Nigel had never sucked cock before, he had kissed it but had never really tried to take it into his mouth. Will had taught his husband how to deep throat which was both a blessing a curse. It drove Will over the edge far too quickly. 

His hips raised fucking Nigel’s mouth. “Fuck,” Will sighed. “Baby, not going to last. Please.” 

Nigel allowed Will’s cock to fall from his mouth wet and heavy against his husband’s lower stomach. He continued kissing the shaft and licking a long stripe down the vein before Will was tugging him up to kiss his lips. “Baby, fuck me.” 

Nigel nodded, reaching for their pillowcase to gather their lube. He slicked himself up, taking the time to tease his head against Will’s hole for a moment before slowly entering him. Will gripped at Nigel’s back and kissed his neck as he filled him. His whine came out breathy and soft, which Nigel kissed away, joining their mouths and kissing while Nigel rut his hips forward fucking into Will. Pulling back until only the head remained inside before slamming back in, tasting Will’s cries.

“Harder. harder, baby.” Nigel obliged, drunk off of Will’s sounds, trying, again and again, to draw those whimpers out. 

“Always my pretty boy,” Nigel sighed, like a mantra, against Will’s lips looking him in the eye, continuing to fuck into him. “All mine.” 

Nigel was reminded of their first time together, ever. The look in Will’s eyes had been the exact same. He had wondered at the time if Will looked at every client like that, sick to his stomach terrified that was the case. But he didn’t and he hadn’t. That look was for Nigel only and always had been. Will’s body knew who it belonged with, long before his brain did. Nigel saw the last twenty years flicker past in his memory. From every kiss, every midnight slow dance, every hand-holding walk they took through crowded streets of hundreds of cities around the world, every smile Will gave him, he wished he had counted them. Surprised to even deserve one, nonetheless thousands. Will was everything to him, and he sometimes found himself too scared to touch Will, too afraid his fingers would meet his form and his body would disappear like smoke. Like the figment he surely was. They were both stuck in a perpetual state of die-hard love, and nothing could ever compare, nothing could come between them. They were magnets that had finally found their perfect opposite, melded for life with a force that couldn’t break them. 

Nigel’s sweat-dampened forehead touched Will’s and he cried out as he came, rocking forward. Will clutched his biceps and came immediately after, kissing Nigel’s sighing and trembling lips. They rocked together milking out their orgasms, tasting each other’s pleasure as they floated down, their chests rising and falling. 

Nigel kissed Will’s neck, resting there trying to catch his breath. 

“It blows my mind…how,” Nigel’s breaths were shallow. He kissed Will’s clavicle. “How fucking in love with you I am almost twenty years later.” 

Will chuckled, petting the back of Nigel’s hair. “Me too, baby. Me too.” They kissed a gentle peck before they relaxed for a while, nuzzling as they regained their resting heart rates. 

Once Nigel’s composure was regained he kissed down Will’s body again, pressing his husband's legs back to lap softly at Will’s hole, leaking with him. Nigel’s beard against that part of Will’s body made him bite down on his lower lip staring down watching his husband clean him, one hand gently clenching the sheets while the other gently pet at Nigel’s hair, his thighs twitching every few moments from the aftershocks and the still coursing pleasure of it all. When Nigel was finished he crawled back up again to kiss Will’s lips and lay onto his back. Will immediately curled up against him as Nigel lit a cigarette, taking a puff and blowing the smoke out away from Will before kissing his forehead. 

“Mm, thank you,” Will said, nuzzled up against Nigel’s neck. His eyes were closed breathing in the relaxing scent of the cigarette. A smell that always reminded him of his love. 

“For what?” Nigel said. “Baby, it was a joint effort.” 

“Not that,” Will said with a small smile. 

“Then for what?” Nigel moved a strand of one of Will’s wayward curls behind his ear. 

Will hesitated before speaking, his voice coming out at almost a whisper. 

“For deciding that I was worth fighting for.” 

Nigel’s exhaled, caressing Will’s cheek right over his scar with the knuckle holding his cigarette. 

Will’s eyes were wide and full of love. Those eyes made Nigel want to melt, damn near every time. 

Will rarely brought up the past, rarely showed his insecurities, but when he did, Nigel was always there to provide him the comfort and security he needed. They stayed looking into one another’s eyes for a moment in silence before Nigel finally found the words to speak. 

“I’d go to battle for you,” Nigel said. “Every day if I needed to. You know that. Right?” He held Will’s chin between his thumb and pointer finger. 

Will nodded slowly. “I know.” 

Nigel could have played it easy, could’ve never returned to the brothel, could’ve never gotten to know the boy, could have decided to not come back to Louisiana for his job after the banning. 

Where would Will be if he hadn’t? If he hadn’t stepped up and taken the risk to show him what a healthy relationship should truly be like? Nigel hated to think about it, what any other alternate realities held for them. Anything but their current life together was unfathomable. 

There had been so much room for error. Anything could’ve gone wrong. A butterfly could have fluttered its wings and it could have changed their course drastically. It was truly a miracle they had ended up where they currently were. Safe, happy, and devastatingly in love. 

Happenstance, being in the right place at the right time. Those things were important for finding love. But holding onto it, nurturing it, growing it, that’s where the fight came in. And Nigel and Will would never stop fighting for one another.

_Until death do they fucking part. _

The End 

* * *

Art by @magpiewendigo on Twitter

Art by @jocomhbha on Twitter

Art by @shatouto on Twitter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story is complete and I'm very emotional to be saying goodbye to these characters and this story. I've been working on it for the past nine months. This was my first novel-length fanfiction I've ever completed after having been writing for fandoms for over ten years. I'm very proud of myself for accomplishing this feat and I thank every single person who took the time to read this story and anyone who will and has left me comments and feedback. Your comments kept me motivated to keep going and give this story the ending it deserved. 
> 
> Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments make me so happy. This story means the world to me so if you enjoyed please let me know 🌹


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